廣東省深圳中考真題作文青春飛揚解說詞課件

中考真題青春不覺老朱顏，強半銷磨薄領間——一輪復習第三周作文——目錄1234審題-摘取內容要素構思-建立內容邏輯成文-句段銜接成篇升級-優(yōu)化詞句表達CONTENTSPre-writingwhatwhowhywhenwherehow寫什么？話題+體裁給誰寫？誰來寫？作者/讀者為什么寫？寫作的目的什么時候時態(tài)：？什么地點？怎么寫？拓展內容六何分析法“地圖”為了達成寫作目的要采用什么寫作方式Pre-writingTIP1:完成六何分析表格(5W1H)Step1審題-摘取內容要素whatwhowhywhenwherehow體裁：解說詞①我②同學們①畢業(yè)活動一般過去時海邊②解說詞參加國際學生vlog作品展①海邊活動②活動感言①沙灘排球......晚上搭帳篷聚餐清理垃圾分享會下午Pre-writingStep1審題-摘取內容要素TIP2:提取重點短語并翻譯沙灘排球

沖浪

搭帳篷

聚餐

清理垃圾

分享會增進友誼

寶貴的回憶

abeachvolleyballgamesurfingputuptenthaveapicnicpickupthelittersharefeelingpromotefriendshipvaluablememoriesPre-writing

TIP1:確定謀篇布局Step2構思-建立內容邏輯whatwhowhywhenwherehow①我②同學們①畢業(yè)活動一般過去時海邊②解說詞參加國際學生vlog作品展①海邊活動②活動感言①沙灘排球......晚上搭帳篷聚餐清理垃圾分享會下午Pre-writingBeginningBodyEnding感謝語Step2構思-建立內容邏輯1.下午，我們打沙灘排球。TIP2:頭腦風暴各段句子并翻譯BeginningBodyEnding引出話題（已給出）感謝語

（已給出）①海邊活動②活動感言①沙灘排球......晚上搭帳篷聚餐清理垃圾分享會下午2.有些同學在附近游泳，另一些同學享受著海上沖浪的樂趣。3.我們在沙灘上清理垃圾。4.晚上，我們搭起帳篷在沙灘上野餐。5.我們坐在一起，并分享對這次難忘的經(jīng)歷的感受。6.我們不僅增進我們的友誼，而且活動給我們留下寶貴的回憶。Pre-writingStep2構思-建立內容邏輯1.

下午，我們打沙灘排球。TIP2:頭腦風暴各段句子并翻譯BeginningEnding引出話題（已給出）感謝語

（已給出）Intheafternoon,

Body①海邊活動②活動感言①沙灘排球......晚上搭帳篷聚餐清理垃圾分享會下午We

playedabeachvolleyballgame.Pre-writingStep2構思-建立內容邏輯2.有些同學在附近游泳，另一些同學享受著海上沖浪的樂趣。TIP2:頭腦風暴各段句子并翻譯BeginningEnding引出話題（已給出）感謝語

（已給出）SomestudentsBody①海邊活動②活動感言①沙灘排球......晚上搭帳篷聚餐清理垃圾分享會下午wentswimming

nearby,others

enjoyedthefunofsurfinginthesea.Pre-writingStep2構思-建立內容邏輯3.

我們在沙灘上清理垃圾。TIP2:頭腦風暴各段句子并翻譯BeginningEnding引出話題（已給出）感謝語

（已給出）WeBody①海邊活動②活動感言①沙灘排球......晚上搭帳篷聚餐清理垃圾分享會下午pickedupthelitteronthebeach.Pre-writingStep2構思-建立內容邏輯4.晚上，我們搭起帳篷，并在沙灘上野餐。TIP2:頭腦風暴各段句子并翻譯BeginningEnding引出話題（已給出）感謝語

（已給出）Atnight,Body①海邊活動②活動感言①沙灘排球......晚上搭帳篷聚餐清理垃圾分享會下午weputuptentsandonthebeach.hadapicnicPre-writingStep2構思-建立內容邏輯5.我們坐在一起，并分享對這次難忘的經(jīng)歷的感受。TIP2:頭腦風暴各段句子并翻譯BeginningEnding引出話題（已給出）感謝語

（已給出）AllofusBody①海邊活動②活動感言①沙灘排球......晚上搭帳篷聚餐清理垃圾分享會下午sataroundandourfeelingexperience.sharedaboutthisunforgettablePre-writingStep2構思-建立內容邏輯

6.

我們不僅增進我們的友誼，而且活動給我們留下寶貴的回憶。TIP2:頭腦風暴各段句子并翻譯BeginningEnding引出話題（已給出）感謝語

（已給出）WeBody①海邊活動②活動感言①沙灘排球......晚上搭帳篷聚餐清理垃圾分享會下午notonlypromoteourfriendship,butalsothisactivityleavesusvaluablememories.Pre-writingStep3成文-句段銜接成篇TIP:連句成段、連段成篇Beginning(Para.1)引出話題Body(Para.2)要點1：海邊活動；要點2：活動感悟Ending(Para.3)感謝語

Hi,everyone!IamLiHua.lt'smygreatpleasuretopresentmyvlogtoyou.

LastSaturday,wewenttotheseasidetocelebrateourgraduation.Intheafternoon,wehadabeachvolleyballgame.Somestudentswentswimmingnearby,othersenjoyedthefunofsurfinginthesea.Wepickedupthelitteronthebeach.Atnight,weputuptentsandhadapicnic.Allofussataroundandsharedourfeelingaboutthisunforgettableexperience.Wenotonlypromoteourfriendship,butalsothisactivityleavesusavaluableexperience.Somuchformyvideo.Ihopeyouhaveenjoyedit.ThankyouhowWhile-writingStep4升級-優(yōu)化詞句表達TIP:高分策略Beginning(Para.1)引出話題Body(Para.2)要點1：海邊活動；要點2：活動感悟Ending(Para.3)感謝語

Hi,everyone!IamLiHua.lt'smygreatpleasuretopresentmyvlogtoyou.LastSaturday,wewenttotheseasidetocelebrateourgraduation.Intheafternoon,wehadabeachvolleyballgame.Somestudentswentswimmingnearby,othersenjoyedthefunofsurfinginthesea.Wepickedupthelitteronthebeach.Atnight,weputuptentsandhadapicnic.Allofussataroundandsharedourfeelingaboutthisunforgettableexperience.Wenotonlypromoteourfriendship,butalsothisactivityleavesusavaluableexperience.Somuchformyvideo.Ihopeyouhaveenjoyedit.Thankyou（1）內容升級（對中間段落how的內容進行發(fā)散擴展）（2）連接詞（過渡句，邏輯詞）While-writingIntheafternoon,wehadabeachvolleyballgame.Step4升級-優(yōu)化詞句表達Body(para2)要點：海邊活動；

要點：活動感言我們玩得很開心weallhadagoodtime.TIP:內容升級：對how部分進行內容擴展Intheafternoon,

一起去海邊今天是晴天內容擴展的方法：描述事實wewenttotheseasidetogether.Itwasasunnyday.Somestudentswentswimmingnearby,othersenjoyedthefunofsurfinginthesea.內容擴展的方法：描述感受swimmingnearby,othersenjoyedthefunofsurfinginthesea.Somestudents

wentWeallhadagoodtime.wewenttotheItwasasunnyseasidetogether.

Wehadabeachvolleyballday.game.While-writingwepickedupthelitteronthebeach.Step4升級-優(yōu)化詞句表達Body(para2)要點：海邊活動；

要點：活動感言我們做的食物非常美味Thefoodcookedbyuswassodelicious.TIP:內容升級：對how部分進行內容擴展Beforedark,

天黑前多么有意義內容擴展的方法：時間邏輯詞，感受Beforedark，Howmeaningfulitwas!wassodelicious.apicnic.

wepickedupHowthelitteronthebeach.

Atnight,meaningfulitwas!weputuptwotentsand

hadAtnight,weputuptwotentsandhadapicnic.內容擴展的方法：描述感受ThefoodcookedbyusWhile-writingAllofussataroundandsharedourfeelingaboutthisunforgettableexperience.Step4升級-優(yōu)化詞句表達Body(para2)要點：海邊活動；

要點：活動感言通過這次活動Throughthisactivity,TIP:內容升級：對how部分進行內容擴展Finally,

最后內容擴展的方法：時間邏輯詞Finally,leavesusavaluableexperience.ourfriendship,

butalsothisactivityallofussataroundand

Throughsharedourfeelingaboutthisunforgettableexperience.

thisactivity,

WenotonlypromoteWenotonlypromoteourfriendship,butalsothisactivityleavesusavaluableexperience.內容擴展的方法：過渡詞，期待我希望我們都有一個更美好的未來。Ihopethatallofushaveabetterlife.Ihopethatallofushaveabetterlife.While-writing參考范文

Hi,everyone!IamLiHua.lt'smygreatpleasuretopresentmyvlogtoyou.

LastSaturday,wewenttotheseasidetocelebrateourgraduation.Intheafternoon,wewenttotheseasidetogether.Itwasasunnyday.Wehadabeachvolleyballgame.Somestudentswentswimmingnearby,othersenjoyedthefunofsurfinginthesea.

Weallhadagoodtime.Beforedark，wepickedupthelitteronthebeach.Howmeaningfulitwas!Atnight,weputuptentsandhadapicnic.Thefoodcookedbyuswassodelicious.Allofussataroundandsharedourfeelingaboutthisunforgettableexperience.Throughthisactivity,Wenotonlypromoteourfriendship,butalsothisactivityleavesusavaluableexperience.

Ihopethatallofushaveabetterlife.Somuchformyvideo.Ihopeyouhaveenjoyedit.ThankyouPost-writingthestandardofevaluation評分標準Post-writing小試牛刀（2023年作文）Post-writing范文Sincerely

LearningthatvolunteerstomeettheNewZealandEducationgroupandintroduceoursmartcampusareingreatneed.I'mwritingtoapplytobecomeavolunteer.IholdafirmbeliefthatIamqualifiedforthispositionbecauseIhavethefollowingadvantages.

Firstandforemost,Iamfamiliarwiththeachievementsofsmartcampus.Forexample,teachersandstudentscansurftheInternetfreelyintheclassroomwiththehelpofadvancedequipmen