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Unit4Pygmalion備課資料ACTVMrs.Higgins'sdrawing-room.Sheisatherwriting-tableasbefore.Theparlor-maidcomesin.THEPARLOR-MAID[atthedoor]Mr.Henry,mam,isdownstairswithColonelPickering.MRS.HIGGINS.Well,shewthemup.THEPARLOR-MAID.Theyreusingthetelephone,mam.Telephoningtothepolice,Ithink.MRS.HIGGINS.What!THEPARLOR-MAID[comingfurtherinandloweringhervoice]Mr.Henry'sinastate,mam.IthoughtI'dbettertellyou.MRS.HIGGINS.IfyouhadtoldmethatMr.Henrywasnotinastateitwouldhavebeenmoresurprising.Tellthemtocomeupwhentheyvefinishedwiththepolice.Isupposeheslostsomething.THEPARLOR-MAID.Yes,mam[going].MRS.HIGGINS.GoupstairsandtellMissDoolittlethatMr.HenryandtheColonelarehere.AskhernottocomedowntillIsendforher.THEPARLOR-MAID.Yes,mam.Higginsburstsin.Heis,astheparlor-maidhassaid,inastate.HIGGINS.Lookhere,mother:heresaconfoundedthing!MRS.HIGGINS.Yes,dear.Good-morning.[Hecheckshisimpatienceandkissesher,whilsttheparlor-maidgoesout].Whatisit?HIGGINS.Eliza'sbolted.MRS.HIGGINS[calmlycontinuingherwriting]Youmusthavefrightenedher.HIGGINS.Frightenedher!nonsense!Shewasleftlastnight,asusual,toturnoutthelightsandallthat;andinsteadofgoingtobedshechangedherclothesandwentrightoff:herbedwasntsleptin.Shecameinacabforherthingsbeforeseventhismorning;andthatfoolMrs.Pearceletherhavethemwithouttellingmeawordaboutit.WhatamItodo?MRS.HIGGINS.Dowithout,I'mafraid,Henry.Thegirlhasaperfectrighttoleaveifshechooses.HIGGINS[wanderingdistractedlyacrosstheroom]ButIcantfindanything.IdontknowwhatappointmentsIvegot.I'm—[Pickeringcomesin.Mrs.Higginsputsdownherpenandturnsawayfromthewriting-table].PICKERING[shakinghands]Good-morning,Mrs.Higgins.HasHenrytoldyou?[Hesitsdownontheottoman].HIGGINS.Whatdoesthatassofaninspectorsay?Haveyouofferedareward?MRS.HIGGINS[risinginindignantamazement]YoudontmeantosayyouhavesetthepoliceafterEliza?HIGGINS.Ofcourse.Whatarethepolicefor?Whatelsecouldwedo?[HesitsintheElizabethanchair].PICKERING.Theinspectormadealotofdifficulties.Ireallythinkhesuspectedusofsomeimproperpurpose.MRS.HIGGINS.Well,ofcoursehedid.Whatrighthaveyoutogotothepoliceandgivethegirl'snameasifshewereathief,oralostumbrella,orsomething?Really![Shesitsdownagain,deeplyvexed].HIGGINS.Butwewanttofindher.PICKERING.Wecantlethergolikethis,youknow,Mrs.Higgins.Whatwerewetodo?MRS.HIGGINS.Youhavenomoresense,eitherofyou,thantwochildren.Why—Theparlor-maidcomesinandbreaksofftheconversation.THEPARLOR-MAID.Mr.Henry:agentlemanwantstoseeyouveryparticular.HesbeensentonfromWimpoleStreet.HIGGINS.Oh,bother!Icantseeanyonenow.Whoisit?THEPARLOR-MAID.AMr.Doolittle,sir.PICKERING.Doolittle!Doyoumeanthedustman?THEPARLOR-MAID.Dustman!Ohno,sir:agentleman.HIGGINS[springingupexcitedly]ByGeorge,Pick,it'ssomerelativeofhersthatshesgoneto.Somebodyweknownothingabout.[Totheparlor-maid]Sendhimup,quick.THEPARLOR-MAID.Yes,sir.[Shegoes].HIGGINS[eagerly,goingtohismother]Genteelrelatives!nowweshallhearsomething.[HesitsdownintheChippendalechair].MRS.HIGGINS.Doyouknowanyofherpeople?PICKERING.Onlyherfather:thefellowwetoldyouabout.THEPARLOR-MAID[announcing]Mr.Doolittle.[Shewithdraws].Doolittleenters.Heisbrilliantlydressedinanewfashionablefrock-coat,withwhitewaistcoatandgreytrousers.Aflowerinhisbuttonhole,adazzlingsilkhat,andpatentleathershoescompletetheeffect.HeistooconcernedwiththebusinesshehascomeontonoticeMrs.Higgins.HewalksstraighttoHiggins,andaccostshimwithvehementreproach.DOOLITTLE[indicatinghisownperson]Seehere!Doyouseethis?Youdonethis.HIGGINS.Donewhat,man?DOOLITTLE.This,Itellyou.Lookatit.Lookatthishat.Lookatthiscoat.PICKERING.HasElizabeenbuyingyouclothes?DOOLITTLE.Eliza!notshe.Nothalf.Whywouldshebuymeclothes?MRS.HIGGINS.Good-morning,Mr.Doolittle.Wontyousitdown?DOOLITTLE[takenabackashebecomesconsciousthathehasforgottenhishostess]Askingyourpardon,maam.[Heapproachesherandshakesherprofferedhand].Thankyou.[Hesitsdownontheottoman,onPickering'sright].IamthatfullofwhathashappenedtomethatIcantthinkofanythingelse.HIGGINS.Whatthedickenshashappenedtoyou?DOOLITTLE.Ishouldntmindifithadonlyhappenedtome:anythingmighthappentoanybodyandnobodytoblamebutProvidence,asyoumightsay.Butthisissomethingthatyoudonetome:yes,you,HenryHiggins.HIGGINS.HaveyoufoundEliza?Thatsthepoint.DOOLITTLE.Haveyoulosther?HIGGINS.Yes.DOOLITTLE.Youhavealltheluck,youhave.Iaintfoundher;butshe'llfindmequickenoughnowafterwhatyoudonetome.MRS.HIGGINS.Butwhathasmysondonetoyou,Mr.Doolittle?DOOLITTLE.Donetome!Ruinedme.Destroyedmyhappiness.Tiedmeupanddeliveredmeintothehandsofmiddleclassmorality.HIGGINS[risingintolerantlyandstandingoverDoolittle]Youreraving.Youredrunk.Youremad.Igaveyoufivepounds.AfterthatIhadtwoconversationswithyou,athalf-a-crownanhour.Iveneverseenyousince.DOOLITTLE.Oh!Drunk!amI?Mad!amI?Tellmethis.DidyouordidyounotwritealettertoanoldblighterinAmericathatwasgivingfivemillionstofoundMoralReformSocietiesallovertheworld,andthatwantedyoutoinventauniversallanguageforhim?HIGGINS.What!EzraD.Wannafeller!Hesdead.[Hesitsdownagaincarelessly].DOOLITTLE.Yes:hesdead;andI'mdonefor.NowdidyouordidyounotwritealettertohimtosaythatthemostoriginalmoralistatpresentinEngland,tothebestofyourknowledge,wasAlfredDoolittle,acommondustman.HIGGINS.Oh,afteryourlastvisitIremembermakingsomesillyjokeofthekind.DOOLITTLE.Ah!youmaywellcallitasillyjoke.Itputthelidonmerightenough.JustgivehimthechancehewantedtoshewthatAmericansisnotlikeus:thattheyrecognizeandrespectmeritineveryclassoflife,howeverhumble.Themwordsisinhisbloomingwill,inwhich,HenryHiggins,thankstoyoursillyjoking,heleavesmeashareinhisPre-digestedCheeseTrustworththreethousandayearonconditionthatIlectureforhisWannafellerMoralReformWorldLeagueasoftenastheyaskmeuptosixtimesayear.HIGGINS.Thedevilhedoes!Whew![Brighteningsuddenly]Whatalark!PICKERING.Asafethingforyou,Doolittle.Theywontaskyoutwice.DOOLITTLE.ItaintthelecturingImind.I'lllecturethemblueintheface,Iwill,andnotturnahair.It'smakingagentlemanofmethatIobjectto.Whoaskedhimtomakeagentlemanofme?Iwashappy.Iwasfree.ItouchedprettynigheverybodyformoneywhenIwantedit,sameasItouchedyou,HenryHiggins.NowIamworrited;tiedneckandheels;andeverybodytouchesmeformoney.It'safinethingforyou,saysmysolicitor.Isit?saysI.Youmeanit'sagoodthingforyou,Isays.WhenIwasapoormanandhadasolicitoroncewhentheyfoundapraminthedustcart,hegotmeoff,andgotshutofmeandgotmeshutofhimasquickashecould.Samewiththedoctors:usedtoshovemeoutofthehospitalbeforeIcouldhardlystandonmylegs,andnothingtopay.NowtheyfindsoutthatI'mnotahealthymanandcantliveunlesstheylooksaftermetwiceaday.InthehouseI'mnotletdoahand'sturnformyself:somebodyelsemustdoitandtouchmeforit.AyearagoIhadntarelativeintheworldexcepttwoorthreethatwouldntspeaktome.NowIvefifty,andnotadecentweek'swagesamongthelotofthem.Ihavetoliveforothersandnotformyself:thatsmiddleclassmorality.YoutalkoflosingEliza.Dontyoubeanxious:Ibetshesonmydoorstepbythis:shethatcouldsupportherselfeasybysellingflowersifIwasntrespectable.Andthenextonetotouchmewillbeyou,HenryHiggins.I'llhavetolearntospeakmiddleclasslanguagefromyou,insteadofspeakingproperEnglish.Thatswhereyoullcomein;andIdaresaythatswhatyoudoneitfor.MRS.HIGGINS.But,mydearMr.Doolittle,youneednotsufferallthisifyouarereallyinearnest.Nobodycanforceyoutoacceptthisbequest.Youcanrepudiateit.Isntthatso,ColonelPickering?PICKERING.Ibelieveso.DOOLITTLE:[softeninghismannerindeferencetohersex]Thatsthetragedyofit,maam.It'seasytosaychuckit;butIhaventthenerve.Whichofushas?We'reallintimidated.Intimidated,maam:thatswhatweare.WhatisthereformeifIchuckitbuttheworkhouseinmyoldage?Ihavetodyemyhairalreadytokeepmyjobasadustman.IfIwasoneofthedeservingpoor,andhadputbyabit,Icouldchuckit;butthenwhyshouldI,acausethedeservingpoormightaswellbemillionairesforallthehappinesstheyeverhas.Theydontknowwhathappinessis.ButI,asoneoftheundeservingpoor,havenothingbetweenmeandthepauper'suniformbutthishereblastedthreethousandayearthatshovesmeintothemiddleclass.(Excusetheexpression,maam:youduseityourselfifyouhadmyprovocation).Theyvegotyoueverywayyouturn:it'sachoicebetweentheSkillyoftheworkhouseandtheCharBydisofthemiddleclass;andIhavntthenervefortheworkhouse.Intimidated:thatswhatIam.Broke.Boughtup.Happiermenthanmewillcallformydust,andtouchmefortheirtip;andI'lllookonhelpless,andenvythem.Andthatswhatyoursonhasbroughtmeto.[Heisovercomebyemotion].MRS.HIGGINS.Well,I'mverygladyourenotgoingtodoanythingfoolish,Mr.Doolittle.ForthissolvestheproblemofEliza'sfuture.Youcanprovideforhernow.DOOLITTLE[withmelancholyresignation]Yes,maam:I'mexpectedtoprovideforeveryonenow,outofthreethousandayear.HIGGINS[jumpingup]Nonsense!hecantprovideforher.Heshantprovideforher.Shedoesntbelongtohim.Ipaidhimfivepoundsforher.Doolittle:eitheryoureanhonestmanorarogue.DOOLITTLE[tolerantly]Alittleofboth,Henry,liketherestofus:alittleofboth.HIGGINS.Well,youtookthatmoneyforthegirl;andyouhavenorighttotakeheraswell.MRS.HIGGINS.Henry:dontbeabsurd.IfyoureallywanttoknowwhereElizais,sheisupstairs.HIGGINS[amazed]Upstairs!!!ThenIshalljollysoonfetchherdownstairs.[Hemakesresolutelyforthedoor].MRS.HIGGINS[risingandfollowinghim]Bequiet,Henry.Sitdown.HIGGINS.I—MRS.HIGGINS.Sitdown,dear;andlistentome.HIGGINS.Ohverywell,verywell,verywell.[Hethrowshimselfungraciouslyontheottoman,withhisfacetowardsthewindows].ButIthinkyoumighthavetoldmethishalfanhourago.MRS.HIGGINS.Elizacametomethismorning.Shepassedthenightpartlywalkingaboutinarage,partlytryingtothrowherselfintotheriverandbeingafraidto,andpartlyintheCarltonHotel.Shetoldmeofthebrutalwayyoutwotreatedher.HIGGINS[boundingupagain]What!PICKERING[risingalso]MydearMrs.Higgins,shesbeentellingyoustories.Wedidnttreatherbrutally.Wehardlysaidawordtoher;andwepartedonparticularlygoodterms.[TurningonHiggins].HigginsdidyoubullyherafterIwenttobed?HIGGINS.Justtheotherwayabout.Shethrewmyslippersinmyface.Shebehavedinthemostoutrageousway.Inevergavehertheslightestprovocation.TheslipperscamebangintomyfacethemomentIenteredtheroom—beforeIhadutteredaword.Andusedperfectlyawfullanguage.PICKERING[astonished]Butwhy?Whatdidwedotoher?MRS.HIGGINS.IthinkIknowprettywellwhatyoudid.Thegirlisnaturallyratheraffectionate,Ithink.Isntshe,Mr.Doolittle?DOOLITTLE.Verytender-hearted,maam.Takesafterme.MRS.HIGGINS.Justso.Shehadbecomeattachedtoyouboth.Sheworkedveryhardforyou,Henry!Idontthinkyouquiterealizewhatanythinginthenatureofbrainworkmeanstoagirllikethat.Well,itseemsthatwhenthegreatdayoftrialcame,andshedidthiswonderfulthingforyouwithoutmakingasinglemistake,youtwosatthereandneversaidawordtoher,buttalkedtogetherofhowgladyouwerethatitwasalloverandhowyouhadbeenboredwiththewholething.Andthenyouweresurprisedbecauseshethrewyourslippersatyou!Ishouldhavethrownthefire-ironsatyou.HIGGINS.Wesaidnothingexceptthatweweretiredandwantedtogotobed.Didwe,Pick?PICKERING[shrugginghisshoulders]Thatwasall.MRS.HIGGINS[ironically]Quitesure?PICKERING.Absolutely.Really,thatwasall.MRS.HIGGINS.Youdidn'tthankher,orpether,oradmireher,ortellherhowsplendidshe'dbeen.HIGGINS[impatiently]Butsheknewallaboutthat.Wedidntmakespeechestoher,ifthatswhatyoumean.PICKERING[consciencestricken]Perhapswewerealittleinconsiderate.Issheveryangry?MRS.HIGGINS[returningtoherplaceatthewriting-table]Well,I'mafraidshewontgobacktoWimpoleStreet,especiallynowthatMr.Doolittleisabletokeepupthepositionyouhavethrustonher;butshesayssheisquitewillingtomeetyouonfriendlytermsandtoletbygonesbebygones.HIGGINS[furious]Isshe,byGeorge?Ho!MRS.HIGGINS.Ifyoupromisetobehaveyourself,Henry,I'llaskhertocomedown.Ifnot,gohome;foryouhavetakenupquiteenoughofmytime.HIGGINS.Oh,allright.Verywell.Pick:youbehaveyourself.LetusputonourbestSundaymannersforthiscreaturethatwepickedoutofthemud.[HeflingshimselfsulkilyintotheElizabethanchair].DOOLITTLE[remonstrating]Now,now,HenryHiggins!havesomeconsiderationformyfeelingsasamiddleclassman.MRS.HIGGINS.Rememberyourpromise,Henry.[Shepressesthebell-buttononthewriting-table].Mr.Doolittle:willyoubesogoodastostepoutonthebalconyforamoment.IdontwantElizatohavetheshockofyournewsuntilshehasmadeitupwiththesetwogentlemen.Wouldyoumind?DOOLITTLE.Asyouwish,lady.AnythingtohelpHenrytokeepheroffmyhands.[Hedisappearsthroughthewindow].Theparlor-maidanswersthebell.PickeringsitsdowninDoolittle'splace.MRS.HIGGINS.AskMissDoolittletocomedown,please.THEPARLOR-MAID.Yes,mam.[Shegoesout].MRS.HIGGINS.Now,Henry:begood.HIGGINS.Iambehavingmyselfperfectly.PICKERING.Heisdoinghisbest,Mrs.Higgins.Apause.Higginsthrowsbackhishead;stretchesouthislegs;andbeginstowhistle.MRS.HIGGINS.Henry,dearest,youdontlookatallniceinthatattitude.HIGGINS[pullinghimselftogether]Iwasnottryingtolooknice,mother.MRS.HIGGINS.Itdoesntmatter,dear.Ionlywantedtomakeyouspeak.HIGGINS.Why?MRS.HIGGINS.Becauseyoucantspeakandwhistleatthesametime.Higginsgroans.Anotherverytryingpause.HIGGINS[springingup,outofpatience]Wherethedevilisthatgirl?Arewetowaithereallday?Elizaenters,sunny,self-possessed,andgivingastaggeringlyconvincingexhibitionofeaseofmanner.Shecarriesalittlework-basket,andisverymuchathome.Pickeringistoomuchtakenabacktorise.LIZA.Howdoyoudo,ProfessorHiggins?Areyouquitewell?HIGGINS[choking]AmI—[Hecansaynomore].LIZA.Butofcourseyouare:youareneverill.Sogladtoseeyouagain,ColonelPickering.[Heriseshastily;andtheyshakehands].Quitechillythismorning,isntit?[Shesitsdownonhisleft.Hesitsbesideher].HIGGINS.Dontyoudaretrythisgameonme.Itaughtittoyou;anditdoesnttakemein.Getupandcomehome;anddontbeafool.Elizatakesapieceofneedleworkfromherbasket,andbeginstostitchatit,withouttakingtheleastnoticeofthisoutburst.MRS.HIGGINS.Verynicelyput,indeed,Henry.Nowomancouldresistsuchaninvitation.HIGGINS.Youletheralone,mother.Letherspeakforherself.YouwilljollysoonseewhethershehasanideathatIhavntputintoherheadorawordthatIhavntputintohermouth.ItellyouIhavecreatedthisthingoutofthesquashedcabbageleavesofCoventGarden;andnowshepretendstoplaythefineladywithme.MRS.HIGGINS[placidly]Yes,dear;butyoullsitdown,wontyou?Higginssitsdownagain,savagely.LIZA[toPickering,takingnoapparentnoticeofHiggins,andworkingawaydeftly]Willyoudropmealtogethernowthattheexperimentisover,ColonelPickering?PICKERING.Ohdont.Youmustntthinkofitasanexperiment.Itshocksme,somehow.LIZA.Oh,I'monlyasquashedcabbageleaf—PICKERING[impulsively]No.LIZA[continuingquietly]—butIowesomuchtoyouthatIshouldbeveryunhappyifyouforgotme.PICKERING.It'sverykindofyoutosayso,MissDoolittle.LIZA.It'snotbecauseyoupaidformydresses.Iknowyouaregeneroustoeverybodywithmoney.ButitwasfromyouthatIlearntreallynicemanners;andthatiswhatmakesonealady,isntit?YouseeitwassoverydifficultformewiththeexampleofProfessorHigginsalwaysbeforeme.Iwasbroughtuptobejustlikehim,unabletocontrolmyself,andusingbadlanguageontheslightestprovocation.AndIshouldneverhaveknownthatladiesandgentlemendidntbehavelikethatifyouhadntbeenthere.HIGGINS.Well!!PICKERING.Oh,thatsonlyhisway,youknow.Hedoesntmeanit.LIZA.Oh,Ididntmeaniteither,whenIwasaflowergirl.Itwasonlymyway.ButyouseeIdidit;andthatswhatmakesthedifferenceafterall.PICKERING.Nodoubt.Still,hetaughtyoutospeak;andIcouldnthavedonethat,youknow.LIZA[trivially]Ofcourse:thatishisprofession.HIGGINS.Damnation!LIZA[continuing]Itwasjustlikelearningtodanceinthefashionableway:therewasnothingmorethanthatinit.Butdoyouknowwhatbeganmyrealeducation?PICKERING.What?LIZA[stoppingherworkforamoment]YourcallingmeMissDoolittlethatdaywhenIfirstcametoWimpoleStreet.Thatwasthebeginningofself-respectforme.[Sheresumesherstitching].Andtherewereahundredlittlethingsyounevernoticed,becausetheycamenaturallytoyou.Thingsaboutstandingupandtakingoffyourhatandopeningdoor—PICKERING.Oh,thatwasnothing.LIZA.Yes:thingsthatshewedyouthoughtandfeltaboutmeasifIweresomethingbetterthanascullery-maid;thoughofcourseIknowyouwouldhavebeenjustthesametoascullery-maidifshehadbeenletinthedrawing-room.YounevertookoffyourbootsinthediningroomwhenIwasthere.PICKERING.Youmustntmindthat.Higginstakesoffhisbootsallovertheplace.LIZA.Iknow.Iamnotblaminghim.Itishisway,isntit?Butitmadesuchadifferencetomethatyoudidntdoit.Yousee,reallyandtruly,apartfromthethingsanyonecanpickup(thedressingandtheproperwayofspeaking,andsoon),thedifferencebetweenaladyandaflowergirlisnothowshebehaves,buthowshestreated.IshallalwaysbeaflowergirltoProfessorHiggins,becausehealwaystreatsmeasaflowergirl,andalwayswill;butIknowIcanbealadytoyou,becauseyoualwaystreatmeasalady,andalwayswill.MRS.HIGGINS.Pleasedontgrindyourteeth,Henry.PICKERING.Well,thisisreallyveryniceofyou,MissDoolittle.LIZA.IshouldlikeyoutocallmeEliza,now,ifyouwould.PICKERING.Thankyou.Eliza,ofcourse.LIZA.AndIshouldlikeProfessorHigginstocallmeMissDoolittle.HIGGINS.I'llseeyoudamnedfirst.MRS.HIGGINS.Henry!Henry!PICKERING[laughing]Whydontyouslangbackathim?Dontstandit.Itwoulddohimalotofgood.LIZA.Icant.Icouldhavedoneitonce;butnowIcantgobacktoit.Lastnight,whenIwaswanderingabout,agirlspoketome;andItriedtogetbackintotheoldwaywithher;butitwasnouse.Youtoldme,youknow,thatwhenachildisbroughttoaforeigncountry,itpicksupthelanguageinafewweeks,andforgetsitsown.Well,Iamachildinyourcountry.Ihaveforgottenmyownlanguage,andcanspeaknothingbutyours.Thatstherealbreak-offwiththecornerofTottenhamCourtRoad.LeavingWimpoleStreetfinishesit.PICKERING[muchalarmed]Oh!butyourecomingbacktoWimpoleStreet,arntyou?YoullforgiveHiggins?HIGGINS[rising]Forgive!Willshe,byGeorge!Lethergo.Letherfindouthowshecangetonwithoutus.Shewillrelapseintothegutterinthreeweekswithoutmeatherelbow.Doolittleappearsatthecentrewindow.WithalookofdignifiedreproachatHiggins,hecomesslowlyandsilentlytohisdaughter,who,withherbacktothewindow,isunconsciousofhisapproach.PICKERING.Hesincorrigible,Eliza.Youwontrelapse,willyou?LIZA.No:Notnow.Neveragain.Ihavelearntmylesson.IdontbelieveIcouldutteroneoftheoldsoundsifItried.[Doolittletouchesheronherleftshoulder.Shedropsherwork,losingherself-possessionutterlyatthespectacleofherfather'ssplendor]A-a-a-a-a-ah-ow-ooh!HIGGINS[withacrowoftriumph]Aha!Justso.A-a-a-a-ahowooh!A-a-a-a-ahowooh!A-a-a-a-ahowooh!Victory!Victory![Hethrowshimselfonthedivan,foldinghisarms,andspraddlingarrogantly].DOOLITTLE.Canyoublamethegirl?Dontlookatmelikethat,Eliza.Itaintmyfault.Ivecomeintosomemoney.LIZA.Youmusthavetouchedamillionairethistime,dad.DOOLITTLE.Ihave.ButI'mdressedsomethingspecialtoday.I'mgoingtoSt.George's,HanoverSquare.Yourstepmotherisgoingtomarryme.LIZA[angrily]Youregoingtoletyourselfdowntomarrythatlowcommonwoman!PICKERING[quietly]Heoughtto,Eliza.[ToDoolittle]Whyhasshechangedhermind?DOOLITTLE[sadly]Intimidated,Governor.Intimidated.Middleclassmoralityclaimsitsvictim.Wontyouputonyourhat,Liza,andcomeandseemeturnedoff?LIZA.IftheColonelsaysImust,I—I'll[almostsobbing]I'lldemeanmyself.Andgetinsultedformypains,likeenough.DOOLITTLE.Dontbeafraid:shenevercomestowordswithanyonenow,poorwoman!respectabilityhasbrokeallthespiritoutofher.PICKERING[squeezingEliza'selbowgently]Bekindtothem,Eliza.Makethebestofit.LIZA[forcingalittlesmileforhimthroughhervexation]Ohwell,justtoshewtheresnoillfeeling.I'llbebackinamoment.[Shegoesout].DOOLITTLE[sittingdownbesidePickering]Ifeeluncommonnervousabouttheceremony,Colonel.Iwishyoudcomeandseemethroughit.PICKERING.Butyouvebeenthroughitbefore,man.YouweremarriedtoEliza'smother.DOOLITTLE.Whotoldyouthat,Colonel?PICKERING.Well,nobodytoldme.ButIconcluded—naturally—DOOLITTLE.No:thataintthenaturalway,Colonel:it'sonlythemiddleclassway.Mywaywasalwaystheundeservingway.ButdontsaynothingtoEliza.Shedontknow:Ialwayshadadelicacyabouttellingher.PICKERING.Quiteright.We'llleaveitso,ifyoudontmind.DOOLITTLE.Andyoullcometothechurch,Colonel,andputmethroughstraight?PICKERING.Withpleasure.Asfarasabachelorcan.MRS.HIGGINS.MayIcome,Mr.Doolittle?Ishouldbeverysorrytomissyourwedding.DOOLITTLE.Ishouldindeedbehonoredbyyourcondescension,maam;andmypooroldwomanwouldtakeitasatremenjouscompliment.Shesbeenverylow,thinkingofthehappydaysthatarenomore.MRS.HIGGINS[rising]I'llorderthecarriageandgetready.[Themenrise,exceptHiggins].Ishantbemorethanfifteenminutes.[AsshegoestothedoorElizacomesin,hattedandbuttoninghergloves].I'mgoingtothechurchtoseeyourfathermarried,Eliza.Youhadbettercomeinthebroughamwithme.ColonelPickeringcangoonwiththebridegroom.Mrs.Higginsgoesout.Elizacomestothemiddleoftheroombetweenthecentrewindowandtheottoman.Pickeringjoinsher.DOOLITTLE.Bridegroom!Whataword!Itmakesamanrealizehisposition,somehow.[Hetakesuphishatandgoestowardsthedoor].PICKERING.BeforeIgo,Eliza,doforgivehimandcomebacktous.LIZA.Idontthinkpapawouldallowme.Wouldyou,dad?DOOLITTLE[sadbutmagnanimous]Theyplayedyouoffverycunning,Eliza,themtwosportsmen.Ifithadbeenonlyoneofthem,youcouldhavenailedhim.Butyousee,therewastwo;andoneofthemchaperonedtheother,asyoumightsay.[ToPickering]Itwasartfulofyou,Colonel;butIbearnomalice:Ishouldhavedonethesamemyself.Ibeenthevictimofonewomanafteranotherallmylife;andIdontgrudgeyoutwogettingthebetterofEliza.Ishantinterfere.It'stimeforustogo,Colonel.Solong,Henry.SeeyouinSt.George's,Eliza.[Hegoesout].PICKERING[coaxing]Dostaywithus,Eliza.[HefollowsDoolittle].ElizagoesoutonthebalconytoavoidbeingalonewithHiggins.Herisesandjoinsherthere.Sheimmediatelycomesbackintotheroomandmakesforthedoor;buthegoesalongthebalconyquicklyandgetshisbacktothedoorbeforeshereachesit.HIGGINS.Well,Eliza,youvehadabitofyourownback,asyoucallit.Haveyouhadenough?andareyougoingtobereasonable?Ordoyouwantanymore?LIZA.Youwantmebackonlytopickupyourslippersandputupwithyourtempersandfetchandcarryforyou.HIGGINS.IhavntsaidIwantedyoubackatall.LIZA.Oh,indeed.Thenwhatarewetalkingabout?HIGGINS.Aboutyou,notaboutme.IfyoucomebackIshalltreatyoujustasIhavealwaystreatedyou.Icantchangemynature;andIdontintendtochangemymanners.MymannersareexactlythesameasColonelPickering's.LIZA.Thatsnottrue.Hetreatsaflowergirlasifshewasaduchess.HIGGINS.AndItreataduchessasifshewasaflowergirl.LIZA.Isee.[Sheturnsawaycomposedly,andsitsontheottoman,facingthewindow].Thesametoeverybody.HIGGINS.Justso.LIZA.Likefather.HIGGINS[grinning,alittletakendown]Withoutacceptingthecomparisonatallpoints,Eliza,it'squitetruethatyourfatherisnotasnob,andthathewillbequiteathomeinanystationoflifetowhichhiseccentricdestinymaycallhim.[Seriously]Thegreatsecret,Eliza,isnothavingbadmannersorgoodmannersoranyotherparticularsortofmanners,buthavingthesamemannerforallhumansouls:inshort,behavingasifyouwereinHeaven,wheretherearenothird-classcarriages,andonesoulisasgoodasanother.LIZA.Amen.Youareabornpreacher.HIGGINS[irritated]ThequestionisnotwhetherItreatyourudely,butwhetheryoueverheardmetreatanyoneelsebetter.LIZA[withsuddensincerity]Idontcarehowyoutreatme.Idontmindyourswearingatme.Idontmindablackeye:Ivehadonebeforethis.But[standingupandfacinghim]Iwontbepassedover.HIGGINS.Thengetoutofmyway;forIwontstopforyou.YoutalkaboutmeasifIwereamotorbus.LIZA.Soyouareamotorbus:allbounceandgo,andnoconsiderationforanyone.ButIcandowithout

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