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高中英語(yǔ)讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)寫(xiě)作思路梳理Attheendoftheclass,youwillbeabletohaveabasicunderstandingofcontiuationwriting.masterthewritingrulesandwritingstepsofcontiuationwriting.
LearningObjectives目錄
?評(píng)分規(guī)則
?寫(xiě)作注意?寫(xiě)作指導(dǎo)?真題分析一、續(xù)寫(xiě)作文歷年真題分析二、我的讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)主題分類:第一類:與自我主題01:堅(jiān)持不懈/勇敢追夢(mèng)主題02:獲得自信主題03:克服恐懼主題04:學(xué)到美德(誠(chéng)實(shí)、分享合作)第二類:與他人主題05:傳遞善意主題06:愛(ài)的表達(dá)主題07:愛(ài)的和解主題08:見(jiàn)義勇為主題09:認(rèn)知改觀主題10:分享趣事第三類:與自然主題11:環(huán)境保護(hù)主題12:動(dòng)物救人主題13:人救動(dòng)物主題14:獸口逃生主題15:可愛(ài)動(dòng)物全題16:險(xiǎn)境求生三、評(píng)分原則(一)評(píng)分原則1.本題總分為25分,按5個(gè)檔次給分。2.評(píng)分時(shí),先根據(jù)文章的內(nèi)容和語(yǔ)言初步確定其所屬檔次,然后以該檔次的要求來(lái)衡量,確定或調(diào)整檔次,最后給分。3.詞數(shù)少于130,從總分中減去2分。4.評(píng)分時(shí),應(yīng)主要從以下四個(gè)方面考慮:(1)與所給短文及段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)的銜接程度;(2)內(nèi)容的豐富性;(3)應(yīng)用語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯的豐富性和準(zhǔn)確性;(4)上下文的連貫性。5.拼寫(xiě)與標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號(hào)是語(yǔ)言準(zhǔn)確性的一個(gè)方面,評(píng)分時(shí),應(yīng)視其對(duì)交際的影響程度予以考慮。英、美拼寫(xiě)及詞匯用法均可接受。6.如書(shū)寫(xiě)較差以致影響交際,可將分?jǐn)?shù)降低一個(gè)檔次。一檔次描述第五檔(21-25分)①與所給短文融洽度高,與所提供各段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)銜接合理。內(nèi)容豐富。②所使用語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯豐富、準(zhǔn)確,可能有些許錯(cuò)誤,但完全不影響意義表達(dá)。③有效地使用了語(yǔ)句間的連接成分,使所續(xù)寫(xiě)短文結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊。第四檔(16-20分)①與所給短文融洽度較高,與所提供各段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)銜接較為合理。內(nèi)容比較豐富。②所使用語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯較為豐富、準(zhǔn)確,可能有些許錯(cuò)誤,但不影響意義表達(dá)。③比較有效地使用了語(yǔ)句間的連接成分,使所續(xù)寫(xiě)短文結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊。第三檔(11-15分)①與所給短文關(guān)系較為密切,與所提供各段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)有一定程度的銜接。寫(xiě)出了若干有關(guān)內(nèi)容。②應(yīng)用的語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯能滿足任務(wù)的要求,雖有一些錯(cuò)誤,但不影響意義表達(dá)。③應(yīng)用簡(jiǎn)單的語(yǔ)句間連接成分,使全文內(nèi)容連貫。第二檔(6-10分)①與所給短文有一定的關(guān)系,與所提供各段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)有一定程度的銜接。寫(xiě)出了一些有關(guān)內(nèi)容。②語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)單調(diào),詞匯項(xiàng)目有限,有些語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯方面的錯(cuò)誤,影響了意義的表達(dá)。③較少使用語(yǔ)句間的連接成分,全文內(nèi)容缺少連貫性。第一檔(1-5分)①與所提供短文和開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)的銜接較差。產(chǎn)出內(nèi)容太少。②語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)單調(diào),詞匯項(xiàng)目很有限,有較多語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯方面的錯(cuò)誤,嚴(yán)重影響了意義的表達(dá)。③缺乏語(yǔ)句間的連接成分,全文內(nèi)容不連貫。0分白卷、內(nèi)容太少無(wú)法評(píng)判或所寫(xiě)內(nèi)容與所提供內(nèi)容無(wú)關(guān)。各檔次評(píng)分描述2021年新高考卷I&II閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開(kāi)頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫(xiě)兩段,使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。
AMOTHER'SDAYSURPRISE
以2021年新高考I&II卷真題為例
Step1.通讀全文,理清脈絡(luò)1.讀要素2.讀情節(jié)3.讀情感5.讀主題4.讀語(yǔ)言3讀后續(xù)寫(xiě)的寫(xiě)作步驟故事六要素wherewhathowwhywhen
whocharacters
timeevent
reasonplace
result主要內(nèi)容:__________(who)____________________________________(what)___________________(why)_________________(where)_____________(when)._____________________________________________________________(how)1.讀要素(5W1H):抓住六要素,弄清主要內(nèi)容。
AMOTHER'SDAYSURPRISEThetwinswerefilledwithexcitementastheythoughtofthesurprisetheywereplanningforMother'sDay.HowpleasedandproudMotherwouldbewhentheybroughtherbreakfastinbed.TheyplannedtomakeFrenchtoastandchickenporridge.Theyhadwatchedtheirmotherinthekitchen.Therewasnothingtoit.JennaandJeffknewexactlywhattodo.Thebigdaycameatlast.Thealarmrangat6a.m.Thepairwentdownthestairsquietlytothekitchen.Theydecidedtoboiltheporridgefirst.TheyputsomericeintoapotofwaterandleftittoboilwhiletheymadetheFrenchtoast.Jeffbroketwoeggsintoaplateandaddedinsomemilk.Jennafoundthebreadandputtwoslicesintotheeggmixture.Next,Jeffturnedonthesecondstoveburnertoheatupthefryingpan.EverythingwasgoingsmoothlyuntilJeffstartedfryingthebread.Thepanwastoohotandthebreadturnedblackwithinseconds.Jennathrewtheburntpieceintothesinkandputintheothersliceofbread.Thistime,sheturneddownthefiresoitcookednicely.][
whenwhowherewhat&whyThenJeffnoticedsteamshootingoutofthepotandthelidstartingtoshake.Thenextminute,theporridgeboiledoverandputoutthefire.Jennapanicked.Thankfully,Jeffstayedcalmandturnedoffthegasquickly.Butthestovewasamessnow.JennatoldJefftocleanitupsotheycouldcontinuetocooktherestoftheporridge.ButJeff'shandtouchedthehotburnerandhegaveacryofpain.Jennamadehimputhishandincoldwater.Thenshecaughtthesmellofburning.Ohdear!Thepieceofbreadinthepanhadturnedblackaswell.Asthetwinslookedaroundthemindisappointment,theirfatherappeared._______________________________________________________Thetwinscarriedthebreakfastupstairsandwoketheirmotherup._____________________________________________________________how主要內(nèi)容:__________(who)____________________________________(what)__________________(why)______________(where)________________(when)._____________________________________________________________(how)theporridgeboiledoverandthebreadturnedblack故事六要素wherewhathowwhyMother’sDayinthekitchenthetwins(Jenna&Jeff);mother;fathermakebreakfastformothergivemotherasurprisewhenwho
However,theyfailed.
Theporridgeboiledoverandthebreadturnedblack.ThetwinsplannedtomakebreakfastfortheirmothertogiveherasurpriseonMother'sDayinthekitchenThinkaboutthequestions:1.Whatdidthefatherseeandhowdidhefeel?(所見(jiàn)/所感)2.Whatmaythefathersaywhenseeingthemess?(所說(shuō))3.Whatmaythetwinssaytotheirfather?(所說(shuō))HowFatherhelpedthetwinsmakebreakfast.第一段續(xù)寫(xiě)細(xì)節(jié):themessinthekitchen;shocked/surprised/angry...“Whatareyoudoinghere?”(直接引語(yǔ))---askedwhathadhappened(間接引語(yǔ))“OhDad,weweretryingto...”(直接引語(yǔ))---explainedtheirplantohim(間接引語(yǔ))4.Whatmaythefatherdoorsaynext?(所做)5.Howdidthetwinsfeelandwhatdidtheydo?(所感/所做)
6.Whatmaythefatherdoafterhelpingthetwinsmakebreakfast?(所做)HowFatherhelpedthetwinsmakebreakfast.第一段續(xù)寫(xiě)細(xì)節(jié):comfortedthetwins,...;offeredtohelp
themmakethebreakfast;helped/toldthetwinstocleanupthekitchen...becamehappy/excitedagain/cheeredup...;didastold...wentbacktosleep/sneakedbacktobed...(偷偷溜回床上)7.Wasthebreakfastreadyintheend?Yes.Thebreakfast/surprisewasready.BeginningClimaxEndingThetwinsplannedtomakebreakfastfortheirmother.
Process
StoryMountainexcitedEverythingwasgoingsmoothly.confident/happyTheporridgeboiledoverandthebreadturnedblack.panicked;disappointedhappy/delightedThetwinsfinallymadeitwiththehelpoftheirfather.Retelling如何寫(xiě)出高分作文高分作文特點(diǎn)傳神的動(dòng)作、表情和心理活動(dòng)2高級(jí)多變的語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)3賞心悅目的書(shū)寫(xiě)1賞心悅目的書(shū)寫(xiě)...whichmademequiverwithanuncontrollableterror
/
horror
/
fright.(難以控制地發(fā)抖)Astimetickedby,fearcreptuponmyheart.(爬上我心頭)Iwasfloodedwithasenseofhorror.(被恐懼感淹沒(méi))Seeingthis,Ifeltmyfeargrowing
/
increasing(劇增)inside.Ifeltawaveofanxiety(一陣焦慮)sweptovermybody(襲來(lái))aflushof(表情緒的名詞)awaveof
=
afeeling
/
senseof
=
aburstof/
asurgeof(一陣)joy/excitement/pride/anger/rage/panic/terror/sorrow/sadness/grief/embarrassment/disappointment/guilty/shame...floodedoversb
=
sweptoversbTearsblurredone'seyes.One'seyesgotmisty.One’seyesmisted
/
dimmed
withtears.(淚眼模糊)...becloseto
tears(幾乎要哭了)tears(roll/
streameddownone’seyes
/
cheeks
/
face)(淚水落下)Tearswelledupinhereyes.傳神的動(dòng)作、表情、心理活動(dòng):寫(xiě)作素材分類整理withabsolutecertainty斬釘截鐵地withfalseenthusiasm故作熱情地withgreatseriousness
特別嚴(yán)肅地withsuddenresolution突然堅(jiān)決地speakwithpassion充滿激情地說(shuō)inasoft/gentle/mildtone用溫柔的語(yǔ)氣說(shuō)inasoftvoice以溫柔的口吻inanexcited/angryvoice以興奮/生氣的口吻insurprise驚奇地inalowtone/voice低聲地inawhisper
低聲說(shuō)throughgrittedteeth
咬牙切齒地mutterbetweenteeth低聲含糊地說(shuō)roarwithlaughter大笑著說(shuō)letoutascreamofhorror
發(fā)出恐懼的尖叫wordsofcomfort安慰的話utteracryofjoy/grief發(fā)出快樂(lè)/悲痛的叫聲feelingsofexcitement興奮的表情傳神的動(dòng)作、表情、心理活動(dòng):寫(xiě)作素材分類整理高級(jí)多變的語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)Asthetwinslookedaroundthemindisappointment,theirfatherappeared.
Whenhesawthemess,hewasshockedandaskedwhathadhappened.Thetwinsexplainedtheirplantohim.Hecomfortedthem.Thenhetoldthemtocleanupthekitchenandhelpedthemmadethebreakfast.Thetwinscheeredupanddidastold.ThekitchenwascleanedandFathersneakedbacktobedafterfinishingmakingthebreakfast.Noweverythingwasready.
第一段續(xù)寫(xiě)
初稿
Asthetwinslookedaroundthemindisappointment,theirfatherappeared.
Seeingthemess,thefatherwasshockedandaskedwhathadhappened.
(現(xiàn)在分詞作狀語(yǔ);并列謂語(yǔ)).Afterknowingtheirplan,heapproachedthetwinswithhishandstouchingtheirheadsgently.Hecomfortedthem,“Nevermind.Let’stryitagain”.
ThenhetoldthemtocleanupthekitchenwhilehehelpedthemmakebreakfastforMother(時(shí)間狀語(yǔ)從句).
Thetwinscheeredupanddidastold(并列謂語(yǔ)).Halfanhourlater,thekitchenwascleanedandFathersneakedbacktobedafterfinishingmakingthebreakfast.
Noweveryhingwasready.第一段續(xù)寫(xiě)
修改潤(rùn)色:第二段續(xù)寫(xiě)
初稿Thetwinscarriedthebreakfastupstairsandwoketheirmotherup.Motherwasverysurprisedtofindbreakfastreadyinfrontofher.
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