匆匆英譯版本的對比及賞析

1、朱自清（18981948），原名自華、號秋實，改名自清；原籍浙江紹興，生于江蘇省東?？h（今連云港 市東?？h平明鎮(zhèn)）；現(xiàn)代杰出的散文家、詩人、學(xué)者、民主戰(zhàn)士。主要作品有背影、春、梅雨潭的綠、荷塘月色。燕子去了，有再來的時候；楊柳枯了，有再青的時候；桃花謝了，有再開的時候。但是，聰明的，你告訴我，我們的日子為什么一去不復(fù)返呢？是有人偷了他們罷：那是誰？又藏在何處呢？是他們自己逃走了罷：現(xiàn)在又到了哪里呢？我不知道他們給了我多少日子；但我的手確乎是漸漸空虛了。在默默里算著，八千多日子已經(jīng)從我手中溜去；像針尖上一滴水滴在大海里，我的日子滴在時間的流里，沒有聲音，也沒有影子。我不禁頭涔涔而淚潸潸了。去的盡

2、管去了，來的盡管來著；去來的中間，又怎樣地匆匆呢？早上我起來的時候，小屋里射進兩三方斜斜的太陽。太陽他有腳啊，輕輕悄悄地挪移了；我也茫茫然跟著旋轉(zhuǎn)。于是洗手的時候，日子從水盆里過去；吃飯的時候，日子從飯碗里過去；默默時，便從凝然的雙眼前過去。我覺察他去的匆匆了，伸出手遮挽時，他又從遮挽著的手邊過去，天黑時，我躺在床上，他便伶伶俐俐地從我身上跨過，從我腳邊飛去了。等我睜開眼和太陽再見，這算又溜走了一日。我掩著面嘆息。但是新來的日子的影兒又開始在嘆息里閃過了。在逃去如飛的日子里，在千門萬戶的世界里的我能做些什么呢？只有徘徊罷了，只有匆匆罷了；在八千多日的匆匆里，除徘徊外，又剩些什么呢？過去的日子如

3、輕煙，被微風(fēng)吹散了，如薄霧，被初陽蒸融了；我留著些什么痕跡呢？我何曾留著像游絲樣的痕跡呢？我赤裸裸來到這世界，轉(zhuǎn)眼間也將赤裸裸的回去罷？但不能平的，為什么偏要白白走這一遭?。磕懵斆鞯?，告訴我，我們的日子為什么一去不復(fù)返呢？ 民主戰(zhàn)士朱自清于1922年3月28日創(chuàng)作的散文匆匆作為短短600余字的散文， 題為匆匆， 卻非“匆匆” 之作， 飽含著深刻的文學(xué)意蘊。從歷史內(nèi)容層面讀匆匆， 掠過“五四” 知識青年忙于追求進步的匆匆身影； 從哲學(xué)意味層讀匆匆， 飽含時間流逝的思辨； 從審美意蘊層讀匆匆， 感受情景交融的意境， 豐富的意象。文章緊扣“匆匆”二字，細(xì)膩地刻畫了時間流逝的蹤跡，表達了作者對時光流逝

4、的無奈和惋惜。文章的特點：一是結(jié)構(gòu)精巧，層次清楚，轉(zhuǎn)承自然，首尾呼應(yīng)；二是文字清秀雋永，純樸簡練；三是情景交融，無論是寫燕子、楊柳、桃花，還是寫太陽，都與“我們的日子為什么一去不復(fù)返呢”的感嘆融為一體，處處流露出作者對時光流逝感到無奈和惋惜。 Rush 譯By 朱純深Swallows may have gone, but there is a time of return; willow trees may have died back, but there is a time of re-greening; peach blossoms may have fallen, but they w

5、ill bloom again. Now, you the wise, tell me, why should our days leave us, never to return? - If they had been stolen by someone, who could it be? Where could he hide them? If they had made the escape themselves, then where could they stay at the moment?I dont know how many days I have been given to

6、 spend, but I do feel my hands are getting empty. Taking stock silently, I find that more than eight thousand days have already slid away from me. Like a drop of water from the point of a needle disappearing into the ocean, my days are dripping into the stream of time, soundless, trace-less. Already

7、 sweat is starting on my forehead, and tears welling up in my eyes.Those that have gone have gone for good, those to come keep coming; yet in between, how swift is the shift, in such a rush? When I get up in the morning, the slanting sun marks its presence in my small room in two or three oblongs. T

8、he sun has feet, look, he is treading on, lightly and furtively; and I am caught, blankly, in his revolution. Thus-the day flows away through the sink when I wash my hands, wears off in the bowl when I eat my meal, and passes away before my day-dreaming gaze as reflect in silence. I can feel his has

9、te now, so I reach out my hands to hold him back, but he keeps flowing past my withholding hands. In the evening, as I lie in bed, he strides over my body, glides past my feet, in his agile way. The moment I open my eyes and meet the sun again, one whole day has gone. I bury my face in my hands and

10、heave a sigh. But the new day begins to flash past in the sigh.What can I do, in this bustling world, with my days flying in their escape? Nothing but to hesitate, to rush. What have I been doing in that eight-thousand-day rush, apart from hesitating? Those bygone days have been dispersed as smoke b

11、y a light wind, or evaporated as mist by the morning sun. What traces have I left behind me? Have I ever left behind any gossamer traces at all? I have come to the world, stark naked; am I to go back, in a blink, in the same stark nakedness? It is not fair though: why should I have made such a trip

12、for nothing!You the wise, tell me, why should our days leave us, never to return? 28 March,1922 Transient Days 譯 By 張培基 If swallows go away, they will come back again. If willows wither, they will turn green again. If peach blossoms fade, they will flower again. But, tell me, you the wise, why shoul

13、d our days go by never to return? Perhaps they have been stolen by someone. But who could it be and where could he hide them? Perhaps they have just run away by themselves. But where could they be at the present moment? I dont know how many days I am entitled to altogether, but my quota of then is u

14、ndoubtedly wearing away. Counting up silently, I find that more than 8000 days have already slipped away through my fingers. Like a drop of water falling off a needle point into the ocean, my days are quietly dripping into the stream of time without leaving a trace. At the thought of this, sweat ooz

15、es from my forehead and tears trickle down my cheeks.What is gone is gone, what is to come keeps coming. How swift is the transition in between! When I get up in the morning, the slanting sun casts two or three squarish patches of light into my small room. The sun has feet too, edging away softly an

16、d stealthily. And, without knowing it, I am already caught in its revolution. Thus the day flows away through the sink when I wash my hands; vanishes in the rice bowl when I have my meal; passes away quietly before the fixed gaze of my eyes when I am lost in reverie. Aware of its fleeting presence,

17、I reach out for it only to find it brushing past my outstretched hands. In the evening, when I lie on my bed, it nimbly strides over my body and flits past my feet. By the time when I open my eyes to meet the sun again, another day is already gone. I heave a sigh, my head buried in my hands. But, in

18、 the midst of my sighs, a new day is flashing past. Living in this world with its fleeting days and teeming millions, what can I do but waver and wander and live a transient life? What have I been doing during the 8000 fleeting days except wavering and wandering? The bygone days, like wisps of smoke

19、, have been dispersed by gentle winds, and, like thin mists, have been evaporated by the rising sun. What traces have I left behind? No, nothing, not even gossamer-like traces. I have come to this world stark naked, and in the twinkling of an eye, I am to go back as stark naked as ever. However, I a

20、m taking it very much to heart: why should I be made to pass through this world for nothing at all? O you the wise, would you tell me please: why should our days go by never to return? 原名：匆匆 譯名：張培基：Transient Days 朱純深：Rush 對比：匆匆一詞，朱翻時采取了直譯，對比：匆匆一詞，朱翻時采取了直譯，“Rush”Rush”本身就有本身就有“匆匆匆匆”之意，而張翻時則取意譯之意，而張翻時則

21、取意譯“Transient Days - Transient Days - 轉(zhuǎn)瞬即轉(zhuǎn)瞬即逝的日子逝的日子”來代指，二者一動一靜，一張一弛。審視原文，來代指，二者一動一靜，一張一弛。審視原文，“匆匆匆匆”在漢語中乃是疊詞，連讀之間有輕促之感，令人生出在漢語中乃是疊詞，連讀之間有輕促之感，令人生出急切之情，朱自清通篇抒寫急切之情，朱自清通篇抒寫“時光匆匆不我待時光匆匆不我待”的感慨，卻不的感慨，卻不選用更加貼切的選用更加貼切的“時光匆匆時光匆匆”作為文題，一則因為作為文題，一則因為“匆匆匆匆”更更為簡潔，含蓄，二則因其更具音韻美和感染力，符合漢語的表為簡潔，含蓄，二則因其更具音韻美和感染力，符合漢

22、語的表達習(xí)慣，但在轉(zhuǎn)譯為英語時，達習(xí)慣，但在轉(zhuǎn)譯為英語時，“Rush”Rush”雖然也能傳達雖然也能傳達“匆匆匆匆”之意，但更多地體現(xiàn)在人的行動處，且有急躁魯莽的意思，兼之意，但更多地體現(xiàn)在人的行動處，且有急躁魯莽的意思，兼“rush”rush”本身詞義分散廣闊，不易于英語讀者聯(lián)想到時間流逝本身詞義分散廣闊，不易于英語讀者聯(lián)想到時間流逝之遽而產(chǎn)生歧義。兩者相比，張翻的之遽而產(chǎn)生歧義。兩者相比，張翻的“Transient Days”Transient Days”變通變通地采取了意譯，地采取了意譯，“transient”transient”也是標(biāo)準(zhǔn)的書面語散文體，也是標(biāo)準(zhǔn)的書面語散文體，“轉(zhuǎn)瞬即逝

23、的日子轉(zhuǎn)瞬即逝的日子”一目了然，符合英語讀者習(xí)慣，故認(rèn)為張一目了然，符合英語讀者習(xí)慣，故認(rèn)為張翻版本更勝一籌，私以為翻版本更勝一籌，私以為“Rushing Time/Days”Rushing Time/Days”亦比較合適。亦比較合適。原文：燕子去了，有再來的時候；楊柳枯了，有再青的時候；桃花謝了，有再開的時候。翻譯：張培基：If swallows go away, they will come back again. If willows wither, they will turn green again. If peaches shed their blossoms, they will

24、 flower again. 朱純深：Swallows may have gone, but there is a time of return; willow trees may have died back, but there is a time of re-greening; peach blossoms may have fallen, but they will bloom again.對比：翻譯此排比句式時，張朱兩位翻譯大家都作了注解，讓我們得以一窺譯者思路： “張培基：原文開頭三個句子結(jié)構(gòu)類似，譯文采用三個相應(yīng)的句式，力求形似。同時，每句均以if從句為首，使人想起英國詩人雪萊（

25、Shelley）的名句If Winter comes，can Spring be far away，有助于烘托原文的韻味。” “朱純深：文章一開頭，用了一個三重排比句，具有很強的氣勢。英譯時采用了相應(yīng)的句式，但為了避免過多重復(fù)而顯得單調(diào)，在最后一部分稍作改變，不用there is a time of re-blooming?！笨梢姸环g大家在處理這一排比句式時都各有考量各有千秋，但在句式處理上都追可見二位翻譯大家在處理這一排比句式時都各有考量各有千秋，但在句式處理上都追求與原文的對應(yīng)與形似，朱翻時采用了求與原文的對應(yīng)與形似，朱翻時采用了“may have donemay have done，

26、 but there is a time of”but there is a time of”句式，看似與原句句式，看似與原句“x x了，有了，有x x的時候的時候”的時態(tài)對應(yīng)，實則的時態(tài)對應(yīng)，實則“may have done”may have done”在運用時在運用時又多了又多了“也許，可能也許，可能”之意，多了揣測的可能性，令句意稍有偏曲；蓋因原句中的之意，多了揣測的可能性，令句意稍有偏曲；蓋因原句中的“去了，枯了，謝了去了，枯了，謝了”并非純粹表示過去時態(tài)，而是以燕去燕歸，柳枯柳綠，花謝花并非純粹表示過去時態(tài)，而是以燕去燕歸，柳枯柳綠，花謝花開這幾個意象來表示時光流逝，萬物枯榮的常態(tài)，

27、這一常態(tài)是一直存在，四季輪回的，開這幾個意象來表示時光流逝，萬物枯榮的常態(tài)，這一常態(tài)是一直存在，四季輪回的，反觀張翻版本的反觀張翻版本的“If.will” If.will” 這一句式則更加切合時態(tài)，簡潔明了，易于把握中心，這一句式則更加切合時態(tài)，簡潔明了，易于把握中心，與雪萊名詩相仿，更有韻味。與雪萊名詩相仿，更有韻味。原文：我不知道他們給了我多少日子；但我的手確乎是漸漸空虛了。在默默里算著，八千多日子已經(jīng)從我手中溜去；象針尖上一滴水滴在大海里，我的日子滴在時間的流里，沒有聲音也沒有影子。我不禁頭涔涔而淚潸潸了。翻譯：張培基：I dont know how many days I am ent

28、itled to altogether, but my quota of then is undoubtedly wearing away. Counting up silently, I find that more than 8000 days have already slipped away through my fingers. Like a drop of water falling off a needle point into the ocean, my days are quietly dripping into the stream of time without leav

29、ing a trace. At the thought of this, sweat oozes from my forehead and tears trickle down my cheeks.朱純深：I dont know how many days I have been given to spend, but I do feel my hands are getting empty. Taking stock silently, I find that more than eight thousand days have already slid away from me. Like

30、 a drop of water from the point of a needle disappearing into the ocean, my days are dripping into the stream of time, soundless, trace-less. Already sweat is starting on my forehead, and tears welling up in my eyes.對比：在閱讀兩個翻譯版本時，不難發(fā)現(xiàn)朱翻版本更多的是直譯，尤以首句和末句為甚，而張翻則是直譯與意譯相合，在忠實原文的基礎(chǔ)上稍加意譯，更易于讀者理解和把握文章內(nèi)涵。如“但

31、我的手確乎是漸漸空虛了”，朱直接翻譯為“but I do feel my hands are getting empty”，轉(zhuǎn)折稍顯突兀，無形的時間與有形的手之間的聯(lián)系也沒能直接表現(xiàn)出來；而張翻則以意譯法處理：“but my quota of them is undoubtedly wearing away”，quota of them 意為“一定數(shù)額的日子”，也即“壽命的預(yù)期數(shù)額”，補充了“手漸漸空虛”的內(nèi)容物，“wearing away”意為“cause something to become thin，damaged，weak，by constant use”也很是貼切，“-ing”形式

32、也更富有動感，令人如可捉摸，感觸到這逝去的時間。而“從我手中溜去”，朱翻為“slid away from me”，張翻為“slipped away through my fingers”，雖為細(xì)節(jié)，但張的版本化無形為有形，忠實可感。但在“象針尖上一滴水滴在大海里，我的日子滴在時間的流里，沒有聲音也沒有影子”這一句的翻譯時，朱的版本更要可圈可點，“Like a drop of water from the point of a needle disappearing into the ocean, my days are dripping into the stream of time, sou

33、ndless, trace-less”，不論是“disappearing into”，還是“soundless，trace-less”，既符合了原文，又點出了時間如水滴入大海，消融無形，無聲無跡的空茫感覺，也有形式美。最后一句“我不禁頭涔涔而淚潸潸了”的翻譯，朱翻版本則很是突兀，“Already sweat is starting on my forehead, and tears welling up in my eyes”，沒有承接，難免令讀者困惑，而張翻版本則添加了“At the thought of this(一想到這兒）”，承上啟下，原文雖無其字而有其意，屬于增譯，靈活處理，令人嘆服

34、。原文：去的盡管去了，來的盡管來著，去來的中間，又怎樣的匆匆呢？張培基譯： What is gone is gone, what is to come keeps coming. How swift is the transition in between!朱純深譯：Those that have gone have gone for good, those to come keep coming; yet in between, how swift is the shift, in such a rush?對比： 此句中最明顯的不同就是對此句中最明顯的不同就是對“又怎樣的匆匆呢？又怎樣的匆匆

35、呢？”這句的翻譯。朱這句的翻譯。朱的翻譯遵循原文將此句翻譯為疑問句的翻譯遵循原文將此句翻譯為疑問句“in such a rush“in such a rush？”而張的翻譯而張的翻譯則將此句翻譯成為感嘆句則將此句翻譯成為感嘆句“How swift is the transition on “How swift is the transition on between! between! 朱的翻譯直白通俗，與原文一一對應(yīng)，有利于讀者的理解。朱的翻譯直白通俗，與原文一一對應(yīng)，有利于讀者的理解。但張的翻譯則能表現(xiàn)作者想要表達的意思但張的翻譯則能表現(xiàn)作者想要表達的意思-時間流逝之快令人感嘆。時間流逝之

36、快令人感嘆。所以此處用！更能表達作者對于時間的匆匆的震驚和無奈。所以此處用！更能表達作者對于時間的匆匆的震驚和無奈。 其次是關(guān)于其次是關(guān)于“去來的中間去來的中間”這句的翻譯。朱的翻譯是這句的翻譯。朱的翻譯是“yet in “yet in between, how swift is the swift”between, how swift is the swift”張的翻譯是張的翻譯是“How swift is the “How swift is the transition in between!”transition in between!”兩者都突出了兩者都突出了swiftswift這個詞

37、，前者比較直白這個詞，前者比較直白忠于原文，后者則用忠于原文，后者則用how how 句型突出句型突出swiftswift給人更加強烈的沖擊。給人更加強烈的沖擊。原文：早上我起來的時候，小屋里射進兩三方斜斜的太陽。張培基譯：When I get up in the morning, the slanting sun casts two or three squarish patches of light into my small room. 朱純深譯：When I get up in the morning, the slanting sun marks its presence in my

38、 small room in two or three oblongs.對比：對于“射進”這詞的翻譯，朱譯為“marks its presence”有種將陽光擬人的味道，是一種靜態(tài)的描述，雖有文學(xué)的美感但是和原文“射進”一次傳達的動感有出入。張譯為“casts .into”意思是“投入”與原文“射進”更加吻合和朝氣蓬勃。對于“兩三方斜斜的太陽”的翻譯，朱譯為“two or three oblongs.”“oblongs”意思是“長方體的”。有過生活體驗的同學(xué)應(yīng)該不難發(fā)現(xiàn)從外處射進的陽光的確有時會呈現(xiàn)長方體的的形態(tài)。朱的翻譯側(cè)重對于陽光的形態(tài)描寫。張譯為“ two or three squari

39、sh patches ”意思是近似方形的圖形。不難看出張的翻譯是進一步改進了朱的翻譯的，將陽光的斑駁之感描繪出來，給人如臨其境的感覺。 原文：我覺察他去的匆匆了，伸出手遮挽時，他又從遮挽著的手邊過去，天黑時，我躺在床上，他便伶伶俐俐地從我身邊垮過，從我腳邊飛去了。 張培基： Aware of its fleeting presence, I reach out for it only to find it brushing past my outstretched hands. In the evening, when I lie on my bed, it nimbly strides ov

40、er my body and flits past my feet. 朱純深： I can feel his haste now, so I reach out my hands to hold him back, but he keeps flowing past my withholding hands. In the evening, as I lie in bed, he strides over my body, glides past my feet, in his agile way. 朱純深的朱純深的譯文完全直譯，忠實于原文，除了添加一些連詞如譯文完全直譯，忠實于原文，除了添加

41、一些連詞如soso、butbut、asas外，英譯版本的結(jié)構(gòu)以及用詞基本與中文源文基本一外，英譯版本的結(jié)構(gòu)以及用詞基本與中文源文基本一致。致。張培基張培基譯文句式與用詞更為貼近英語表達，符合英語習(xí)慣，譯文句式與用詞更為貼近英語表達，符合英語習(xí)慣，讀來順口舒服。句式更為簡練，用詞更加精到。讀來順口舒服。句式更為簡練，用詞更加精到。 等我睜開眼和太陽再見，這算又溜走了一日。 朱純深：The moment I open my eyes and meet the sun again, one whole day has gone. 張培基：By the time when I open my eyes

42、 to meet the sun again, another day is already gone. 兩種譯文的結(jié)構(gòu)基本相似，都為時間狀語從句與主句兩種譯文的結(jié)構(gòu)基本相似，都為時間狀語從句與主句的組合。但是的組合。但是朱純深朱純深譯文中的譯文中的“The moment”“The moment”更有動更有動態(tài)意義，一睜開眼便意識到時日又已溜走，更完整地態(tài)意義，一睜開眼便意識到時日又已溜走，更完整地表達出了作者對時光流逝的敏銳觀察力，突出了作者表達出了作者對時光流逝的敏銳觀察力，突出了作者對時光的在意。而對時光的在意。而張培基版本張培基版本則更為委婉，文學(xué)性更則更為委婉，文學(xué)性更強。強。 原文

43、：我掩著面嘆息。但是新來的日子的影兒又開始在嘆息里閃過了。 朱純深：I bury my face in my hands and heave a sigh. But the new day begins to flash past in the sigh. 張培基：I heave a sigh, my head buried in my hands. But, in the midst of my sighs, a new day is flashing past. 朱純深版朱純深版譯文忠實于中文原文，結(jié)構(gòu)與中文完全一樣，譯文忠實于中文原文，結(jié)構(gòu)與中文完全一樣，較于死板。而較于死板。而張培基張

44、培基譯文則更符合英語表達習(xí)慣，第譯文則更符合英語表達習(xí)慣，第一句中分主句與獨立主格結(jié)構(gòu)，第二句也分主要和次一句中分主句與獨立主格結(jié)構(gòu)，第二句也分主要和次要句子成分?？傮w來說，要句子成分?？傮w來說，張培基版張培基版譯文更易為英語讀譯文更易為英語讀者接受。者接受。原文：在逃去如飛的日子里，在千門萬戶的世界里的我能做些什么呢？只有徘徊罷了，只有匆匆罷了；在八千多日的匆匆里，除徘徊外，又剩些什么呢？張翻：Living in this world with its fleeting days and teeming millions, what can I do but waver and wander

45、 and live a transient life? What have I been doing during the 8000 fleeting days except wavering and wandering? 朱翻：What can I do, in this bustling world, with my days flying in their escape? Nothing but to hesitate, to rush. What have I been doing in that eight-thousand-day rush, apart from hesitati

46、ng? 分析：首先，對比兩個譯文，朱翻是偏向于直譯的，而張翻則是偏向于意譯，分析：首先，對比兩個譯文，朱翻是偏向于直譯的，而張翻則是偏向于意譯，“逃去逃去如飛如飛”、“千門萬戶千門萬戶”這樣的四字成語，朱翻和張翻都按照自己的理解去翻譯。先看這樣的四字成語，朱翻和張翻都按照自己的理解去翻譯。先看到朱翻，他把到朱翻，他把“我能做些什么呢我能做些什么呢”翻成翻成“What can I do”What can I do”并置于句首，強調(diào)時間飛逝并置于句首，強調(diào)時間飛逝而自己又不能留下什么的無助感。而自己又不能留下什么的無助感?！疤尤ト顼w逃去如飛”、“千門萬戶千門萬戶”直接譯成直接譯成“days day

47、s flying in their escape”“bustling world”flying in their escape”“bustling world”，通俗易懂，結(jié)構(gòu)清晰，不過就缺少，通俗易懂，結(jié)構(gòu)清晰，不過就缺少一點音韻美。而張翻則用一點音韻美。而張翻則用“fleeting days”“teeming millions”fleeting days”“teeming millions”來翻譯，如果單看來翻譯，如果單看teeming(teeming(豐富的豐富的) )和和millions(millions(百萬百萬) )，一般人想不出這兩個詞可以如何聯(lián)系在一起，而，一般人想不出這兩個詞

48、可以如何聯(lián)系在一起，而張翻運用這兩個詞都表達張翻運用這兩個詞都表達“多多”的含義，來表示的含義，來表示“千門萬戶的世界千門萬戶的世界”，語言水平較高，語言水平較高，張翻把第一句和第二句的第一個分句合在一起翻譯，簡練之余又銜接有序，張翻把第一句和第二句的第一個分句合在一起翻譯，簡練之余又銜接有序，“waver waver and wander”“transient”and wander”“transient”分別表示徘徊和匆匆。分別表示徘徊和匆匆?！霸诎饲Ф嗳盏拇掖依镌诎饲Ф嗳盏拇掖依铩保焓侵?，朱是直接用接用“eight-thousand-day rush”eight-thousand-day

49、 rush”，而張翻是，而張翻是“ “ the 8000 fleeting days”the 8000 fleeting days”，相比，相比較而言，張翻是更有動感，較而言，張翻是更有動感，“fleeting”fleeting”是飛逝的意思。是飛逝的意思?？傮w來說，朱翻句式比較單調(diào)，也簡單易懂，而張翻辭藻較華麗些。總體來說，朱翻句式比較單調(diào)，也簡單易懂，而張翻辭藻較華麗些。原文：過去的日子如輕煙卻被微風(fēng)吹散了，如薄霧，被初陽蒸融了；我留著些什么痕跡呢？我何曾留著象游絲樣的痕跡呢？翻譯：張培基：The bygone days, like wisps of smoke, have been di

50、spersed by gentle winds, and, like thin mists, have been evaporated by the rising sun. What traces have I left behind? No, nothing, not even gossamer-like traces.朱純深：Those bygone days have been dispersed as smoke by a light wind, or evaporated as mist by the morning sun. What traces have I left behi

51、nd me? Have I ever left behind any gossamer traces at all?對比：對比：對比兩個翻譯版本，我們能發(fā)現(xiàn)朱純深更多地是遵循原文句式，一一對應(yīng)，對比兩個翻譯版本，我們能發(fā)現(xiàn)朱純深更多地是遵循原文句式，一一對應(yīng)，而張培基則是打破原文的結(jié)構(gòu)，優(yōu)先選擇把內(nèi)在情感表達出來再選擇合適的而張培基則是打破原文的結(jié)構(gòu)，優(yōu)先選擇把內(nèi)在情感表達出來再選擇合適的句式。對句式。對“過去的日子如輕煙卻被微風(fēng)吹散了，如薄霧，被初陽蒸融了過去的日子如輕煙卻被微風(fēng)吹散了，如薄霧，被初陽蒸融了”這這句的翻譯中，張培基使用連詞句的翻譯中，張培基使用連詞“and”and”把原文兩個

52、比喻修辭形成一個并列句把原文兩個比喻修辭形成一個并列句（compound sentencecompound sentence），句式簡潔，而且張培基多運用逗號把句子各成分），句式簡潔，而且張培基多運用逗號把句子各成分分開，使譯句充滿靈動感。而朱純深則完全按照原文的格式，未免顯得有點分開，使譯句充滿靈動感。而朱純深則完全按照原文的格式，未免顯得有點累贅。對累贅。對“我留著些什么痕跡呢？我何曾留著象游絲樣的痕跡呢？我留著些什么痕跡呢？我何曾留著象游絲樣的痕跡呢？”這句的這句的翻譯中，張培基選擇了設(shè)問的形式，答句使用翻譯中，張培基選擇了設(shè)問的形式，答句使用“no, nothing”no, nothi

53、ng”加強了語氣，加強了語氣，表達出一絲悲傷的感情。而朱純深使用一個特殊疑問句和一個普通疑問句，表達出一絲悲傷的感情。而朱純深使用一個特殊疑問句和一個普通疑問句，雖然在句式上顯得有點死板，但是普通疑問句有點類似責(zé)問自己，能讓人感雖然在句式上顯得有點死板，但是普通疑問句有點類似責(zé)問自己，能讓人感同身受。同身受。原文：我赤裸裸來到這世界，轉(zhuǎn)眼間也將赤裸裸地回去罷？譯文：張培基：I have come to this world stark naked, and in the twinkling of an eye, I am to go back as stark naked as ever.朱純

54、深：I have come to the world, stark naked; am I to go back, in a blink, in the same stark nakedness?對比：對比：原文雖是一個疑問句，但表達的卻是一個揣測語氣的肯定句。張培基譯文采用肯定句原文雖是一個疑問句，但表達的卻是一個揣測語氣的肯定句。張培基譯文采用肯定句的形式，直接表達出原作者的意思，而朱純深依然采用普通疑問句，與原文表達意思的形式，直接表達出原作者的意思，而朱純深依然采用普通疑問句，與原文表達意思有所偏差。但是對于有所偏差。但是對于“轉(zhuǎn)眼間轉(zhuǎn)眼間”這一短語，張培基使用這一短語，張培基使用“i

55、n the twinkling of an in the twinkling of an eye”eye”，把內(nèi)里意思表達了出來，但是顯得過長，打破了譯文的節(jié)奏感；而朱純深使用，把內(nèi)里意思表達了出來，但是顯得過長，打破了譯文的節(jié)奏感；而朱純深使用短句，使譯文帶有韻律感。個人建議短句，使譯文帶有韻律感。個人建議“am I go back”am I go back”可以改成可以改成“am I not go am I not go back”back”，這既保留了疑問句的形式，又增強了語氣。兩位譯者的譯文各有千秋，同時，這既保留了疑問句的形式，又增強了語氣。兩位譯者的譯文各有千秋，同時也各有小缺憾，

56、這也是我們以后面對翻譯方式選擇時該思考的。也各有小缺憾，這也是我們以后面對翻譯方式選擇時該思考的。原文：但不能平的，為什么偏要白白走這一遭??？譯文：張培基：However, I am taking it very much to heart: why should I be made to pass through this world for nothing at all?朱純深：It is not fair though: why should I have made such a trip for nothing!對比：對比：兩位譯者采取了不同的方式，但都表達出了強烈的情感。張培基依舊兩

57、位譯者采取了不同的方式，但都表達出了強烈的情感。張培基依舊是采取優(yōu)先表達原文意思，把是采取優(yōu)先表達原文意思，把“不能平的不能平的”的本意的本意“我自己內(nèi)心一直我自己內(nèi)心一直不能釋懷的不能釋懷的”傳達出來；而朱純深則繼續(xù)采取直譯，遵循原文格式，傳達出來；而朱純深則繼續(xù)采取直譯，遵循原文格式，逐字對應(yīng)，把其譯為逐字對應(yīng)，把其譯為“it is not fair though”it is not fair though”。個人認(rèn)為張培基。個人認(rèn)為張培基的意譯版本更為貼切。的意譯版本更為貼切。原文：你聰明的，告訴我，我們的日子為什么一去不復(fù)返呢？朱譯：You the wise, tell me, why should our days leave us, never to return?張譯：O you the wise, would you tell me please: why should our days go by never to return?分析：分析：總地來說，朱純深的譯文較為簡練，與原文對應(yīng)程度更