商務(wù)英語寫作新版第章-chapter-1

Welcometomyclass1BUSINESSENGLISHWRITING

2Chapter1AnOverviewofBusinessWriting商務(wù)寫作概述3Lead-inQuestionsWhatisbusinesscommunication?Canyounamesomewaystocommunicatepeopleinabusinesssetting?Businesscommunicationisaprocessofexchanginginformationandideasinabusinesssetting.

4nonlinguisticeyecontactphysicalappearancefacialexpressionsspaceanddistancegesturepostureFormsofBusinessCommunication5

linguistice-mailslettersmemostelephonecallsconversationfaxesnotesvoicemailsreportsproposalsminutesFormsofBusinessCommunicationWeb6WhyBusinessWriting?Theabilitytowriteeffectivelyisavaluablebusinessasset.1)agreatdealofbusinessistransactedinwriting,whichisinvolvedineverypartofbusiness.2)effectivebusinesswriterscanusetheirskilltohelpincreasetheircompany’ssalesandprofitsbypromotinggoodrelations.3)proficiencyinwritinggivesapersonaladvantageoverlesscapablewritersandcontributessubstantiallytohis/herself-confidence----anecessaryqualityforbusinesssuccess.7?

Toestablisharelationship?Tocommunicateyourideas

precisely?ToconveyagoodimageofyourorganizationTheimportanceofsuccessfulbusinesswriting

8FunctionsofBusinessWritingToinformToinfluence/persuade9ToinformMessagestoinformareusedtoconveythevastamountofinformationneededtocompletetheday-to-dayoperations.Themajorpurposeofmostofthesemessagesistohavethereceiverunderstandabodyofinformationandconcentrateonthelogicalpresentationofthecontents.10Toinfluence/persuadeInadditiontoprovidinginformation,abusinessmessagesmustalsoinfluencethereader’sattitudesandactions.11

Tosecurethedesiredresponse,itisnecessarytohaveanadequateknowledgeoftheEnglishlanguageandanunderstandingofhumannature.Thewritershouldhaveanacquaintancewiththeparticularinterestand,ifpossible,theemotionsofthereader.Nocommunicationiswhollysuccessfulunlessitretainsthereader’sgoodwill.12Abusinessmessageisconsideredsuccessfulwhen:

1)thereceiverinterpretsthemessageasthesenderintendedit,and

2)itachievesthesender’spurposes.Inordertoachievegoodcommunication,weshouldconsiderthefollowing“sixC’sprinciples”.ThesixC’sarebothcriteriaandtechniquesforeffectivebusinesswriting.Courtesy,Correctness,Conciseness,Clarity,Concreteness,CompletenessCriteriaforEffectiveBusinessWriting13Courtesy

CorrectnessConcisenessClarityConcretenessCompletenessSixC’sPrinciples（6C原則）141.Courtesy（禮貌）

Specialattentionshouldbedevotedtoassuringthecourtesyofbusinesscommunication.Itmeanstreatingpeoplewithrespectandfriendlyhumanconcern.Itisapositivevalue,notneutral(中立的）

ornegative.Thetonemustconveypositivegoodwill,positivewarmth,andpositiveinterestinthereader.Thecourteouswritershouldbesincereandtactful,thoughtfulandappreciative,andanswerletterspromptly.15CourtesyBeingverypolite,eveninaskingtheaddresseetopaybackthedebtsorrefusinghisdemands,yourletterstillshouldbeverymildandtactful.

Beingpromptinreplyingtotheoppositepart’sletter.Thereplyshouldusuallybesentonthesameday.Ifitisimpossibleforyoutogiveapromptreplyindetailonthesameday,youshouldwriteashortnotetotheclientexplainingwhy.16Developingcourtesyinaletterusuallyinvolvesthreeaspects:

1)usingyou-viewpoint

2)takingapositivetone

3)beingconversational17Courtesy1)Usingyou-viewpoint

(reader-oriented)Compare:WewillacceptbidsuntilJune10.Youmaysubmitabid(投標(biāo)）untilJune10.(reader-oriented)Pleaseacceptourapologiesforthedelay.Wehopeyouhavenotbeenseriouslyinconveniencedbythedelay.(reader-oriented)18DearSirs,wearesorry

youhavemisunderstoodus.DearsSirs,wearesorrywedidn’tmakeourselvesclear.Wecannotunderstandwhyyouhavehadtroublewiththesearticles.Wepresumethattheremustbesomereasonsforyouhavingtroublewiththesearticles.19

DifferentAttitudes

We/Iattitude

YouattitudeAlargesaleofourproductswillmakeourcompanymoreprofitable.Weareinneedoffundandyoumustpay…Wecannotofferyouanyrefund（償還額，退款）

…Obviouslyyouforgettellingusthecolor…AgoodsaleoftheproductswillbenefityouTomaintainyourexcellentcredit,pleaseremit(匯款）…Youcouldobtainarefundif…Pleaseindicateyourchoiceofcolor…20Courtesy2)TakingapositivetoneusepositivewordsandexpressionsinsteadofnegativewordsandexpressionsCompare:Theofficeisclosedafter4.Theofficeisopenuntil4.Wecannothavethesefiguresforyoubeforenextweek.Wewillhavethesefiguresforyounextweek.(NG)(NG)21Compare:Pleasebegoodenoughtoadviseus.Pleasetellus.Ihadhopedthatafavorableconsiderationonyourrequestcouldbepossible.Iamsorrywecannotapproveyourrequest.(NG)(NG)22Courtesy3)Beingconversationalwritenaturallyandsincerely1.ReferenceismadetoyourMay3letter,inwhichyoudescribedtheapprovedprocedureforinitiatingaclaim.2.InreplytoyourJune18letter,pleasebeinformedthatyouradherencetoinstructionsoutlinedthereinwillgreatlyfacilitateattainmentofourobjective.1.PleaserefertoyourMay3letter,inwhichyoutellhowtofileaclaim.2.ByfollowingtheprocedureyoulistedinyourJune18letter,youwillhelpusreachourgoal.233.Ishallbemostpleasedtoavailmyselfofyourkindsuggestionwhenandifthepricedeclines.3.Ishallgladlyfollowyoursuggestionifandwhenthepricefalls.24ThewaystogetCourtesy1)usingyou-viewpoint

2)takingapositivetone

3)beingconversational

25Correctness（正確）Correctgrammar,punctuationandspelling

arebasicrequirementsforbusinesswriting,Inaddition,correctnessmeanschoosingthecorrectleveloflanguage,andusingaccurateinformationanddata.26ExampleEnclosedisthecopyofreceipt.(×)Enclosedisacopyofthereceipt.(√)Iamlookingforanothersaleschannels.(×)Iamlookingforothersaleschannels.(√)27

AvoidthefollowingerrorsSentencefragments(不完整句）Run-onsentences（連寫句）Commasplices（逗號錯(cuò)誤）Misplacedelements(修飾語錯(cuò)位）Danglingmodifiers（懸垂結(jié)構(gòu)）28SentenceFragmentsSentenceFragmentsareincompletesentences.Theyareusuallymissingoneofthethreecomponents:subject,verb,object.Ofcourse,thereareexceptionstothisrule.Stop!Isaonewordsentence."GetMoving!"isgrammaticallycorrecttoo.MostsentencefragmentswrittenbyChineseareonesthathavemissingverbs.29Incorrect:

Fortheunemployed,goingtoattainnightschooltoprepareforabetterjob.

Correct

Fortheunemployed,theyshouldgotoattainnightschooltopreparethemselvesforbetterjobs.

30Run-on

sentences

Arun-onsentenceistwoormorecompletethoughts(orindependentclauses)thatareruntogetherwithoutadequatesigngiventomarkthebreakbetweenthem.Somerun-onsentenceshavenopunctuationatalltomarkthebreakbetweenthethoughts:

(ChinesearepronetomakingsuchamistakebecauseofthewayChinesesentencesarestructured.ManyChinesesentencesarelongsentencesseparatedbycommas.Thesame"thought",whenexpressedinEnglish,andwiththesamecommasinplace,usuallyleadstorun-onsentences.)31Typicalexamples

Iamgoingtoschool,ifIdon'tgetthereontime,Iwillbelate,myteacherwillpunishme,Iwillhavetostayafterclass.

Humannatureisseldomassimpleasitappearshastyjudgmentsarethereforeoftenwrong.

32Theymaybecorrectedinfourprincipalways:

1)Useaperiodandwritetwoseparatesentences.

Humannatureisseldomassimpleasitappears.Hastyjudgmentsarethereforeoftenwrong.

2)Useacommaandacoordinatingconjunction.

Humannatureisseldomassimpleasitappears,andhastyjudgmentsarethereforeoftenwrong.

333)Useasemicolon.

Humannatureisseldomassimpleasitappears;hastyjudgmentsarethereforeoftenwrong.

4)Makeoneoftheclausesdependent.

Becausehumannatureisseldomassimpleasitappears,hastyjudgmentsarethereforeoftenwrong.

34CommasplicesAcommaspliceresultswhentwosentencesareincorrectlyjoinedorsplicedtogetherwithacomma.

Profitsweredownin2005,theBoardblamedtherecession.Profitsweredownin2005.TheBoardblamedtherecession（不景氣）.35MisplacedModifier

Becarefulabouttheplacementofsimplemodifierssuchas“only.”Considerhowtheplacementof“only”canchangethemeaningofasentence:Only

Itestedthebelljar(鐘形罩)forleaksyesterday.Ionlytestedthebelljarforleaksyesterday.Itestedonlythebelljarforleaksyesterday.Itestedthebelljaronlyforleaksyesterday.Itestedthebelljarforleaksonlyyesterday.36DanglingModifiers

所謂懸垂修飾語是指充當(dāng)狀語的分詞短語、不定式短語、介詞短語以及有連詞加分詞或連詞加介詞短語的縮略結(jié)構(gòu)的修飾語等，與句子的主語不能形成邏輯上的主謂關(guān)系。修改方法：將句子的主語改為修飾語的邏輯主語；將修飾語改成從句。e.g.Swimmingatthelake,arockcutJim’sfoot.----Swimmingatthelake,Jimcuthisfootonarock.----WhenJimwasswimmingatthelake,hecuthisfootonarock.37

Howtogetcorrectness?1)choosetherightform

fordifferentkindsofwriting2)verify(核實(shí)）spelling3)selectcorrectwordsorphrases4)insertappropriatepunctuation5)therightform6)accuratereliablefigures38CorrectnessCompare:Anyonecanlearntotype.Anyoneofuscanlearntotype.“TheNavy,”saysCaptainMichelStern,

“willhavemoremissilecarriers.”TheNavysaysCaptainMichelSternwillhavemoremissilecarriers.導(dǎo)彈運(yùn)載器

39Examples:Enclosedisthecopyofreceipt.Enclosedisacopyofthereceipt.

acopyofthereceipt

收據(jù)副本/復(fù)印件Iamlookingforanothersaleschannels.Iamlookingforothersaleschannels.

saleschannels

銷售渠道(√)(√)(×)(×)40Conciseness（簡潔）

Effectivewritingisconcise—eachword,sentence,andparagraphcounts.Concisenessmeanstowriteinthefewestpossiblewordswithoutsacrificingcompletenessandcourtesy.Becauseawordymessagerequiresmoretimetowriteandread,businesspeopleputahighpremiumonconcisenessinbusinessmessages.Concisenesswillgiveemphasistoyourmessage.高度重視41Conciseness1)shortenwordyexpressionsCompare:Wehavebeguntoexportourmachinestocountriesabroad.Wehavebeguntoexportourmachines.Fortheamountof$320youcanbuythemotor.For$320youcanbuythemotor.(NG)(NG)42Conciseness2)usewordstoreplacephrasesorclausesCompare:IntheeventthatyouspeaktoMr.Moodinregardtoproduction,askhimtogiveconsiderationtothedeliveryschedule.(NG)IfyouspeaktoMr.Moodaboutproduction,askhimtoconsiderthedeliveryschedule.交貨日期43Examples:Wedonotanticipateanyincreaseinpricesinthenearfuture.Wedonotexpectpricestorisesoon.Owingtothefactthatyourcompetitor’spriceismuchlowerthanyours,wecannotacceptyouroffer.Becauseyourcompetitor’spriceismuchlowerthanyours,wecannotacceptyouroffer.(Better)(Poor)(Poor)(Better)443)Avoidingunnecessaryrepetitionofwordsorideas.Itcameatatimewhenwewerebusy.Leatherdepreciatesinvalueslowly.Itwillcostasumof$120.AcertainpersonbythenameofBillJones.InthecityofColumbusTheradiosellsforthepriceof$5045Clarity（清楚）

Claritytellsthereaderexactlywhatheorshewantsandneedstoknow,usingwordsandaformatthatmakeyourwritingstotallyunderstoodwithjustonereading.Short,familiarwordsandsimple,shortsentencesratherthanlong,difficultwordsandcomplexandlongsentencesarebetterforthispurpose.46ClarityThefollowingaresomewaystohelpachieveclarity:1)

usesimple,shortwordsandsimplesentencestructureCompare:aftersubsequent

largesubstantial

duringinthecourseof

weencloseenclosedpleasefind47Clarity2)avoidusingwordswithdifferentmeaningsCompare:Weshalltakeafirmlinewiththefirm.Weshalltakeastronglinewiththefirm.48Clarity3)puttogetherwordswithcloserelationCompare:TheyboughtabicycleinBeijinginasmallshopwhichcosts$25.00.(NG)Theyboughtabicyclefor$25.00inasmallshopinBeijing.49Clarity4)useactivevoiceCompare:Afaxwassentbyusyesterday.(NG)Wesentyouafaxyesterday.Thesalaryincreasewasreceivedbyallemployees.(NG)Allemployeesreceivedthesalaryincrease.50Howtogetclarity?1)

usesimple,shortwordsandsimplesentencestructure2)avoidusingwordswithdifferentmeanings3)puttogetherwordswithcloserelation4)useactivevoiceAttention:Claritydoesn'tmeantoshortenthesentencebuttooffertheessentialinformationinshortform.51Examples:Theyhaveadecidedadvantageinregardtofreight.Theyhaveadecidedadvantageinregardtofreightcharges(運(yùn)費(fèi)).貨物，運(yùn)費(fèi)(poor)(better)明顯優(yōu)勢

52TheyinformedMessrs.SmithandRichardsonthattheywouldreceiveananswerinafewdays.TheyinformedMessrs.SmithandRichardsonthatthelatterwouldreceiveananswerinafewdays.(poor)(better)53Concreteness(具體）

Yourwritingshouldbevivid,specificandconcreteratherthanvague,generalandabstract,especiallywhenyouarerequiringaresponse,solvingproblems,makinganoffer（出價(jià),發(fā)盤）

oracceptance,etc.Youmustmakesureyourlettercontainsalltheinformationyourreaderneedstoactupon（按照，遵循),avoidincompleteinformation.54Concreteness1)usingconcretemodifiersCompare:Ineedtheprintout（(電腦)打印輸出）

assoonaspossible.(NG)Ineedtheprintoutby3p.m.today.55Concreteness2)avoidingopinionsorgeneralizationsCompare:

Variousaspectsofthisequipmentmakeitagoodchoice.(NG)Thismachineisagoodchoicebecauseitismorecompactandlessexpensivethananyotheroneonthemarket.56ExampleOurapplesareexcellent.Ourapplesarejuicy,crispyandtender.(Concrete)SmithtonCompanyisourbigbuyer.SmithtonCompanydidmorethanonemillionUSDworthofbusinesswithusin2005.(Concrete)57Completeness

Includeallthenecessaryinformationanddatainthemessagebecauseinformationanddatacanhelpsendersgetreceivers’responsesandachievedesiredobjectives.Anincompletemessagemayresultinincreasedcommunicationcosts,lossofgoodwill,sales,andvaluedcustomers,costofreturninggoods,andwastedtimetryingtomakesenseoutoftheincompletemessage.58Example:Supposeyouarewritingalettertoyoursuppliertellinghimthathisgoodswerenotdeliveredontime.Whatkindofinformationshouldyouincludeinyourletter?

59CompletemessageRemindinghimofhispromiseoftimelydelivery.WhatlosseshasthiscausedyouAskingforcompensationifthereisanyagreementonthat.Expectingnosuchthingwillhappen

again.60Exercise:Comparethefollowingpairsofsentences,choosethebetterone.1.Ihavepleasureininformingyou.Iampleasedtotellyou.2.Willyoukindlysendusareplybeforetheendofthemonthforwhichastampedenvelopeisenclosed?

Willyoupleasesendareplyintheenclosedenvelopebeforetheendofthemonth?3.Pleasedonotanticipateanyincreaseinprices.Wedonotexpectpricestorise.（moreconciseness）

(moreclarity)

(moreconciseness)614.Wearesorrythatthemerchandiseisnotuptothestandardandweshallgladlymakeanexchange.

Itisnotourintentiontosuggestthatyoushouldkeepunsatisfactorymerchandise,sowearewillingtoaskyoutoreturnittousatonce,andwewillbegladtomakeanexchange.5.YourletterinreplytooursofMay18camethismorning,andnowwedonotunderstandanymoreclearlyyourcomplaintthanwedidbefore.ThankyouforyourLetterofMay20.Inorderthatwemaybeofthegreatestpossiblehelptoyou,willyoupleasetellusjustwhatyouwishustodoaboutthematters.(moreconcisenessandclarity)(morecourtesy,concretenessandcompleteness)合格62MoreCriteriaandTechniquesforEffectiveBusinessWriting1.Singlingoutyourreader2.Usingthereader’sname3.Buildinggoodwill4.Avoidanger63ApproachestoOrganizingBusinessWriting1.DirectnessinGood-newsandRoutineMessages(deductive)2.IndirectnessinBad-newsmessages(inductive)3.IndirectnessinPersuasion64choosedirectorindirectapproachaccordingtodifferentmessagesandreaders.

direct

approach:

(=deductiveapproach)mainideacomesfirstfollowedbydetailsandexplanations.

indirectapproach:

(=inductiveapproach)explanationprecedesmainidea.direct

approachAdvantages:Savesreader’stimeSetsaproperframeofmindPreventsfrustrationAppearsbusinesslikeindirect

approachAdvantages:RespectsfeelingsofaudienceEncouragesafairhearingMinimizesanegativereaction（創(chuàng)設(shè)一個(gè)合宜的心境）申辯，公正的裁決，聽證（有效率的；條理的）

65Underwhatcircumstancesshouldweusedirectorder?Routineinquiriesandreplies,favorableresponsetoclaimsandadjustmentrequests,recommendationletters,goodnewsaboutemployment,congratulations,messagesofappreciation,condolences,announcement,andgreetingsfallintothiscategory.66Indirectnessinbad-newsmessages

whenthemainmessage