2025屆江蘇省常州市高三年級上冊讀后續(xù)寫講義：黑點(diǎn)背后的希望：Brown安慰鼓勵考試失利挫敗感十足的學(xué)困生

2025屆常州市高三年級期末考試

第二節(jié)（滿分25分）

閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完

整的短文。

“Ifeelhopelessaboutmyschoollife!I'mnotapopularstudentinourclass.I

can'tplaybasketballaswellasotherboys.AndIfailedMathexamagainyesterday,

whichmademe.…”Tom,a16-year-oldboyofMr.Brown'sclass,loweredhishead,

sobbing（啜泣）uncontrollablyintheTeacher9sOffice.

“Pmsorrytohearthat,"Mr.BrownpattedTom'sshouldergentlyandaskedthe

youngboytositdowninfrontofthedesksothattheycouldsitoppositeeachother.

ThiswasthefirsttimethatTomhadturnedtoMr.Brownforhelpbecausehewasso

shyandquietinschool.ButMr.Brownhadnoticedhimmanytimesinschool9s

volunteerwork.Lookingatthesadyoungboy,Mr.Brownwassilentforamoment.

Then,hetookapieceofpaperandapenoutofhisdrawer.

“I'dliketoinviteyoutotakeasurprisetest,myboy”,saidMr.Brown,passing

thepentoTom."AnewMathexam?”,Tomraisedhiseyeswhichwerestillfilled

withtears,gotthepenandrepliedinconfusion,worryingaboutthecomingchallenge.

“Justtakeiteasybecauseit'snotaboutnumbersorfbrmulas（方程Mr.Brown

comfortedhimwithabigsmile.Notknowingwhatwouldcomeintheexampaper,

Tomnoddedhisheadandwipedhistearswithhissleeves.

Mr.BrownhandedTomthequestionpaperandencouragedhimsoftly,"Now,

youcanbeginandpleasefinishthetestwithintenminutes."ToTom'ssurprise,there

wasnoquestionsinthepaper,butjustablackdotinthecenterofthepage.Mr.

BrownthoroughlyreadthroughTom'spuzzledexpressionsandsaid,“Iwantyouto

writewhatyouseethere."Confusedashewas,Tombegantodowhathehadbeen

askedtodo.Meanwhile,Mr.Brownpickedupanovelandstartedreadingit,waiting

patiently.

注意：

（1）續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150個左右；

（2）請按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。

Paragraph1:TomScratchedhisheadanxiously,havingnoideawhattowrite.

Paragraph2:"Whatyourwritingfocusedonwasjusttheblackdot,butyouhave

awholewhitepaper,“SaidMr.Brown.

閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完

整的短文。

“Ifeelhopelessaboutmyschoollife!I'mnotapopularstudentinourclass.I

can'tplaybasketballaswellasotherboys.AndIfailedMathexamagainyesterday,

whichmademe…?"Tom,a16-year-oldboyofMr.Brown'sclass,loweredhishead,

sobbin虱啜五泣）uncontrollably（非謂語動詞做伴隨動作）intheTeacher9sOffice.

"I'msorrytohearthat,"Mr.BrownpattedTom'sshouldergentlyandaskedthe

youngboytositdowninfrontofthedesksothattheycouldsitoppositeeach

others目的狀從）.ThiswasthefirsttimethatTomhadturnedtoMr.Brownforhelp

becausehewassoshyandquietinsc/z。?！盃顝模?ButMr.Brownhadnoticedhim

manytimesinschool'svolunteerwork.Lookin史atthesadyoungboy,Mr.Brown

wassilentforamoment.Then,hetookapieceofpaperandapenoutofhisdrawer.

"I'dliketoinviteyoutotakeasurprisetest,myboy”,saidMr.Brown,passing

thepentoTom.“AnewMathexam?”,Tomraisedhiseyeswhichwerestillfilled

withtears,gotthepenandrepliedin鹿（動作串），wo/ry加&aboutthecoming

challenge（非謂語動詞做伴隨動作）.“Justtakeiteasybecauseifsnotaboutnumbersor

formulas（方萄（狀從）”,Mr.Browncomfortedhimwith。瓦*smile.Notknowing

wouldcomeintheexam（非謂語動詞做原因狀語）,Tomnoddedhisheadand

wipedhistearswithhissleeves.

Mr.BrownhandedTomthequestionpaperandencouragedhimsoftly,"Now,

youcanbeginandpleasefinishthetestwithintenminutes."ToTom飛surprise,there

wasnoquestionsinthepaper,butjustablackdotinthecenterofthepage.Mr.

BrownthoroughlyreadthroughTom'spuzzledexpressionsandsaid,“Iwantyouto

writewhatyousee統(tǒng)ere（賓從）?“Confusedashewas（倒裝句）,Tombegantodowhat

hehadbeenaskedtodo（賓從）.Meanwhile,Mr.Brownpickedupanovelandstarted

readingit,waitingpatiently（非謂語動詞做伴隨動作）.

注意：（1）續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150個左右；（2）請按如下格式在答題卡的相

應(yīng)位置作答。

Paragraph1:TomScratchedhisheadanxiously,havingnoideawhattowrite.

Paragraph2:“Whatyourwritingfocusedonwasjusttheblackdot,butyouhave

awholewhitepaper,“SaidMr.Brown.

1.按高考英語讀后續(xù)寫要求進(jìn)行分類和分析

分

析

內(nèi)容原文反映句

維

度

"Ifeelhopelessaboutmyschool

類

勵志類讀后續(xù)寫life!I'mnotapopularstudentin

型

ourclass."

構(gòu)

從主人公內(nèi)心困惑入手，通過一個特殊

"Lookingatthesadyoungboy,

思

的引導(dǎo)過程，讓主人公領(lǐng)悟到隱藏的潛Mr.Brownwassilentfora

思

0

力和生活的積極面，完成情感轉(zhuǎn)折。moment.

路

-第一段：描寫主人公在“考試”中的困

布惑心理。"Iwantyoutowritewhatyousee

局-第二段：展示老師引導(dǎo)的智慧與主人there."

公心理變化。

框1.起：情緒低落的學(xué)生。

架2.承：老師用智慧的測試引導(dǎo)。"Justtakeiteasybecauseifsnot

提3.轉(zhuǎn)：學(xué)生領(lǐng)悟生活真諦。aboutnumbersorformulas."

煉4.合：學(xué)生情感得到正向提升。

實(shí)

-結(jié)合主人公心理活動的細(xì)膩描寫。

施"Now,youcanbeginandplease

-注重情節(jié)層層遞進(jìn)，尤其是對比學(xué)生

建finishthetestwithintenminutes."

由］后的態(tài)度O

議

分

析

內(nèi)容原文反映句

維

度

-確保心理描寫自然過渡。

"ButMr.Brownhadnoticedhim

意-承接原文情節(jié)，避免斷層。

manytimesinschool'svolunteer

事-巧用象征物（如黑點(diǎn)和白紙）深化主

work."

項(xiàng)題。

巧-以黑點(diǎn)和白紙作為象征，啟發(fā)主人公

妙關(guān)注積極面。"Whatyourwritingfocusedon

wasjusttheblackdot,butyou

設(shè)-巧妙運(yùn)用對比手法（如黑點(diǎn)與白紙、

haveawholewhitepaper."

計(jì)學(xué)生的前后心理轉(zhuǎn)變）。

2.故事山模式分析

StoryMountain思維導(dǎo)圖：

引入：Tom感到無助，向老師傾訴內(nèi)心困惑。

上升：老師提出意外測試，引發(fā)學(xué)生疑惑。

高潮：Tom完成測試，寫下自己的觀察。

下降：老師解釋測試意義，揭示隱藏真諦。

結(jié)局：Tom領(lǐng)悟生活中的積極面，內(nèi)心感到釋然。

關(guān)鍵分析表格：

分析

內(nèi)容原文反映句

角度

人物Tom從自卑到釋然，老

"Mr.Browncomfortedhimwithabigsmile."

刻畫師耐心且充滿智慧。

分析

內(nèi)容原文反映句

角度

情感"Tomraisedhiseyeswhichwerestillfilledwith

從絕望、疑惑到頓悟。

層次tears."

關(guān)鍵

老師的測試設(shè)計(jì)和對黑"Whatyourwritingfocusedonwasjusttheblack

情節(jié)

點(diǎn)的象征意義的解釋。dot,butyouhaveawholewhitepaper."

點(diǎn)

語言簡潔生動，象征手法貫"Lookingatthesadyoungboy,Mr.Brownwas

特色穿始終。silentforamoment.n

心理描寫Tom的緊張、疑"Tomscratchedhisheadanxiously,havingnoidea

描寫惑到釋然的心理轉(zhuǎn)變。whattowrite.n

動作老師耐心引導(dǎo)，Tom認(rèn)"Tomnoddedhisheadandwipedhistearswithhis

描寫真作答。sleeves."

環(huán)境老師辦公室中的溫馨氛“Mr.BrownpattedTom'sshouldergentlyand

askedtheyoungboytositdowninfrontofthe

描寫圍突出教師的關(guān)懷。

desk."

隱含看問題要著眼于整體，

"Youhaveawholewhitepaper."

主題不要糾結(jié)于細(xì)節(jié)。

情感從失落到頓悟的積極轉(zhuǎn)

"Tombegantodowhathehadbeenaskedtodo."

轉(zhuǎn)折變。

空間辦公室內(nèi)不同互動情景"Mr.Brownpickedupanovelandstartedreading

轉(zhuǎn)換的變化。it,waitingpatiently."

時間測試時間的推進(jìn)與心理"Now,youcanbeginandpleasefinishthetest

過渡轉(zhuǎn)變同步。withintenminutes."

3.續(xù)寫所需推薦語料：動作、心理、環(huán)境描寫及詞匯替換

動作描寫例句（8個）

1.Heclenchedhisfists,tryingtosteadyhisnerves.

2.Shetappedherpenrhythmicallyagainstthedesk,lostinthought.

3.Heslouchedinhischair,shoulderssaggingwithdefeat.

4.Shestraightenedherback,determinationshininginhereyes.

5.Hefidgetedwithhissleeves,unabletositstill.

6.Shereachedout,herhandtremblingslightly.

7.Hepacedtheroom,hismindracingwithpossibilities.

8.Shenoddedslowly,processingwhatshehadjustheard.

心理描寫例句（8個）

1.Hismindwasastormofthoughts,eachonemorechaoticthanthelast.

2.Doubtcreptintoherheart,whisperingthatshemightfailagain.

3.Reliefwashedoverhimlikeagentlewave.

4.Herheartachedwithamixtureofregretandhope.

5.Hefeltasurgeofpride,hisconfidenceslowlyrebuilding.

6.Asenseofuneasesettledinherchest,refusingtogoaway.

7.Determinationburnedinhiseyes,pushingasidehisfears.

8.Shefeltasthoughaweighthadbeenliftedoffhershoulders.

環(huán)境描寫例句（8個）

1.Thesunlightfilteredthroughtheblinds,castingwarmpatternsonthefloor.

2.Theroomwasquietexceptforthesofttickingoftheclock.

3.Afaintbreezerustledthepapersonthedesk.

4.Thecozywarmthoftheofficestoodincontrasttothechillyairoutside.

5.Shadowsdancedonthewallsasthesunlightshifted.

6.Thearomaoffreshcoffeelingeredintheair.

7.Thesterilesilenceoftheroomfeltalmostoppressive.

8.Outside,birdschirpedmerrily,oblivioustothetensionwithin.

高級替換詞匯（分場景）

場景普通詞匯高級替換詞匯

情緒表達(dá)happyelated,jubilant

描述失敗failuresetback,downfall

場景普通詞匯高級替換詞匯

強(qiáng)調(diào)信心confidentassured,self-reliant

鼓勵行動tryendeavor,strive

描述過程startinitiate,embark

3.推薦語料：讀后續(xù)寫常用描寫例句

描寫

推薦英文例句（8句）

類別

1.Hescratchedhishead,ahintofconfusioncloudinghisface.

2.Shenoddedslightly,hereyesfullofhesitation.

3.Hewipedhistearswithtremblinghands.

動作4.Sheleanedforward,eagertocatcheveryword.

描寫5.Hefrozeinplace,unsureofwhattodonext.

6.Shesteppedcloser,acomfortingsmileonherlips.

7.Hegrippedthepentightly,hisknucklesturningwhite.

8.Sheglancedaroundnervously,herfingerstappingonthedesk.

1.Anxietycreptintohisheartastheclocktickedaway.

2.Hermindracedwithcountlessthoughts,eachmoreconfusingthanthelast.

3.Awaveofreliefwashedoverhim,lighteninghisburden.

心理4.Doubtcloudedhisjudgment,leavinghimhesitant.

描寫5.Shecouldn'tshakeoffthefeelingofunease.

6.Confidenceslowlyreplacedthefearinhiseyes.

7.Herheartswelledwithgratitude.

8.Asenseofaccomplishmentwarmedhissoul.

1.Theroomwasfilledwithasoft,calminglight.

2.Thetickingoftheclockechoedinthequietoffice.

環(huán)境3.Agentlebreezefromtheopenwindowrustledthepapers.

描寫4.Thescentoffreshlybrewedcoffeelingeredintheair.

5.Thesunlightstreamedthroughtheblinds,castinglongshadowsonthe

floor.

描寫

推薦英文例句（8句）

類別

6.Thefainthumofdistantvoicesbrokethesilence.

7.Thedeskwasclutteredwithbooksandpapers,creatingasenseofwarmth.

8.Thepolishedsurfaceofthewoodendeskreflectedthelight.

高級單詞替換:

場景基礎(chǔ)詞高級替換詞

表達(dá)情感sadsorrowful,despondent

表達(dá)心理轉(zhuǎn)變thinkcontemplate,reflect

表達(dá)行為lookgaze,observe

表達(dá)環(huán)境quietserene,tranquil

表達(dá)結(jié)果happycontent,elated

4.高中語法現(xiàn)象分析

語法現(xiàn)象原文句子解析

"Iwantyoutowritewhatyousee使用了賓語從句“whatyousee

賓語從句

there.nthere”表明寫作內(nèi)容。

"Lookingatthesadyoungboy,

非謂語動詞分詞短語作狀語，表示原因。

Mr.Brownwassilent.n

"Mr.Browncomfortedhimwith使用間接引語表述人物間的對話

間接引語

abigsmile."與情緒傳遞。

生詞積累:

詞

單詞詞義近義詞反義詞例句

性

Hisconfusionwasevidentasheread

confusionn.困惑perplexityclarity

theinstructions.

詞

單詞詞義近義詞反義詞例句

性

使迷bewilder,Thestrangemessagepuzzled

puzzleV.enlighten

惑confuseeveryoneintheroom.

Shepattedthedoggentlyonthe

patV.輕拍tap,strokestrike

head.

4.高中語法現(xiàn)象分析（續(xù)）

語法現(xiàn)象原文句子解析

Tdliketoinviteyouto

"I'dlike”表達(dá)委婉語氣，虛擬語氣增強(qiáng)

虛擬語takeasurprisetest,my

表達(dá)禮貌性與可能性。

boy?

時間狀語"Pleasefinishthetest明確時間狀語"withintenminutes”表示具

從句withintenminutes."體的完成時間要求。

"Whatyourwriting

使用強(qiáng)調(diào)句型“What...was...”突出寫作集中

強(qiáng)調(diào)句型focusedonwasjustthe

于黑點(diǎn)的特定內(nèi)容，強(qiáng)調(diào)對比性。

blackdot."

生詞積累：

詞詞

單詞近義詞反義詞例句

性義

邀Heinvitedmetothedinner,butIwas

inviteV.ask,requestdecline

請unabletoattend.

觀notice,Thescientistobservedthechanges

observeV.ignore

察perceivecarefullyunderthemicroscope.

Theteacherencouragedthestudents

鼓motivate,

encourageV.discouragetospeakconfidentlyduringthe

勵inspire

debate.

詞詞

單詞近義詞反義詞例句

性義

耐

calmly,Shewaitedpatientlyforherturn,

patientlyadv.心impatiently

serenelyshowingnosignsofirritation.

地

Theteacherexplainedtheconceptof

解clarify,

explainV.confusevirtualrealityinasimpleyetengaging

釋elaborate

manner.

例句：

invite:

1.Sheinvitedherfriendstoherbirthdayparty.

2.Heinvitedhertoshareherthoughtsabouttheissue.

encourage:

1.Thecoachencouragedtheteamtokeeppracticingdespitethelosses.

2.Positivefeedbackencouragesstudentstoperformbetterinacademics.

人物刻畫

1.Tom:從一個內(nèi)心充滿困惑和無助的學(xué)生，逐漸轉(zhuǎn)變?yōu)橐粋€逐漸

找回自信的個體。通過Mr.Brown的鼓勵和理解，Tom體驗(yàn)至U的

是一種心理上的轉(zhuǎn)變。

2.Mr.Brown:展現(xiàn)了一個關(guān)心學(xué)生、富有同理心的教師形象。通

過給予幫助和指導(dǎo)，他不僅解決了Tom的表面問題，也為他帶來

了情感上的支持。

情感層次

1.從最初的絕望和無助，到通過一個簡單的互動體驗(yàn)轉(zhuǎn)變，Tom的

情感逐漸回歸到平靜和自信。

2.Mr.Brown通過細(xì)心的關(guān)懷和不急不躁的態(tài)度，成功緩解了Tom

的情緒沖突，使他感到溫暖和被理解。

關(guān)鍵情節(jié)點(diǎn)

1.沖突：Tom感到自己在學(xué)校無法取得成功，對自己的能力產(chǎn)生了

懷疑。

2.轉(zhuǎn)折：Mr.Brown通過"黑點(diǎn)"測試的方式，引導(dǎo)Tom從表面的困

擾轉(zhuǎn)向內(nèi)心的自我反思。

3.解決：Tom從情感上的低谷逐漸恢復(fù)，重新找到了前進(jìn)的力量，

開始重新審視自己的優(yōu)勢與潛力。

隱含主題

1.人生如紙，不能只看表面或一點(diǎn)點(diǎn)失敗。需要看到更多的可能性

和機(jī)會。

2.通過關(guān)心和支持，我們能幫助別人發(fā)現(xiàn)自己潛在的力量和勇氣。

情感描寫與動作描寫分析

?情感描寫：通過Tom的心理變化展示情感層次的轉(zhuǎn)變。他開始時的沮喪

和疑惑逐漸轉(zhuǎn)變?yōu)獒屓缓拖Ｍ?，最后充滿信心。

?動作描寫：動作通過具體行為表現(xiàn)情感，如“擦拭眼淚”“坐下微笑”等，

細(xì)致地刻畫出人物的心理狀態(tài)。

推薦語料

動作描寫

oHeliftedhishead,wipingawaythelastofhistearswiththesleeveof

hisshirt.

oSheslowlyrelaxedhergriponthepen,feelingthetensioninher

fingersease.

oTomsatupstraighter,asenseofcalmreplacingthestorminhischest.

oMr.BrownplacedagentlehandonTom'sshoulder,offeringsilent

reassurance.

心理描寫

oAwaveofreliefwashedoverTom,hisbreathingslowlyeveningout.

oHisheartwasnolongerheavywithdoubt,butlightwith

understanding.

oForthefirsttimeinalongwhile,Tomfeltaflickerofhoperisingin

hischest.

oMr.Brown'swordsresonatedinhismind,leavinghimwithasenseof

possibility.

環(huán)境描寫

oTheofficewaswarmandquiet,astarkcontrasttothestormof

thoughtsswirlinginTom'smind.

oOutsidethewindow,thesunwassetting,castingasoftglowthat

seemedtomatchthemoodintheroom.

oThesoundofpagesturningwastheonlynoiseintheroom,calming

andsteadying.

高級替換詞匯

場景普通詞匯高級替換詞匯

情緒表達(dá)saddespondent,sorrowful

信心confidentself-assured,optimistic

鼓勵helpassist,support

安慰comfortconsole,reassure

轉(zhuǎn)變changetransformation,shift

Version1

Paragraph1:Tomscratchedhisheadanxiously,havingnoideawhattowrite.

Theblankpaperinfrontofhimseemedlikeasilentchallenge,whiletheblackdot

stoodout"ominentlv,mockin?his〃（非謂語動詞做伴隨動作）.Hesitatedto

writeoutontothe〃砍玖adj短語做主語補(bǔ)語）ashedescribedhowtheblackdot

overshadowedthec/ea〃（狀從+賓從），whitesurface.Lostinhis統(tǒng)（非謂語動詞做原因

狀語），hebarelynoticedthetimepassinguntilMr.Brownsoftly（狀從），

"Time'sup,Tom.^^Lookingathiswor」非謂語動詞做伴隨動作）,Tomfeltamixof

embarrassmentandrelief、unsure（adi短語做補(bǔ)語hehadmethisteacher9s

expectations.（賓從）

Paragraph2:“Wfea。writin殳focusedonwasjusttheblackdot,but

haveawholewhite〃即絲“saidMr.Brown,holdingthesheetup（非謂語動詞做伴隨動

作）.“Theblackdotrepresemschallenges,mistakes,orfailuresinlife.Butdon't

forget,Tom,there'ssomuchmoretocelebvateinthe'whiteDapey'-yourkindness,

talents,Dotential."HiswordsstruckachordwithTom,makinghim

realizehownarrowhisperspectivehad）ee〃（非謂語動詞做伴隨動作+賓從）."Lifeisnever

perfect,butweshouldfocusonthepositiveandnotletsetbacksdefineMr.

Brownaddedwithasmile.Inspiredbyhisteacher'swo/vfa（非謂語動詞做原因狀語，Tom

feltas〃rgcofconfidence.Helefttheofficethatdaydeterminedtoembracehis

strengthsandworkonhisweaA7iesscs（adi短語做伴隨動作），knowingthatlife,likethe

whitepaper,wasfullofpossibilities（英心.

亮點(diǎn)分析

情緒描寫亮點(diǎn)：

1.例句：

1."Tomscratchedhisheadanxiously."

2."Lookingathiswork,Tomfeltamixofembarrassmentand

relief/

2.分析：使用了細(xì)膩的心理活動描寫，展現(xiàn)出Tom的內(nèi)心波動，增

強(qiáng)了讀者的代入感。

動作描寫亮點(diǎn)：

1.例句：

1."Hestartedwritingdownwordslike'isolated：'flawed；and

Imperfection.,n

2."Tomwipedhistearswithhissleeves."

2.分析：動作描寫與心理描寫結(jié)合，使情節(jié)發(fā)展更自然、流暢。

環(huán)境描寫亮點(diǎn)：

1.例句:"Theblankpaperinfrontofhimseemedlikeasilentchallenge."

2.分析：用具象化的比喻展現(xiàn)場景氛圍，與人物心情相呼應(yīng)。

語法加分點(diǎn):

1.虛擬語氣:"Lifeisneverperfect,butweshouldfocusonthe

positive."

2.強(qiáng)調(diào)句型："Whatyourwritingfocusedonwasjusttheblackdot.*'

積累語料:

短語/句型升級替換選項(xiàng)同義詞/聯(lián)想詞例句

"scratch"rubone'sTomscratchedhishead,tryingto

frown,hesitate

one'shead"forehead0recalltheanswer.

remainInsteadofworryingaboutfailures,

"focusonthe"lookonthe

optimistic,stayweshouldfocusonthepositive

positive"brightside"

hopefulaspectsoflife.

"defineYourachievements,notyour

"shapeone'sdetermine,

one'smistakes,shoulddefineyour

personality"characterize

identity"identity.

6.優(yōu)秀短語與詞匯分析表（歐路詞典）

核心詞匯詞性詞義近義詞聯(lián)想詞例句

挑戰(zhàn)/

Thistestisnotonlya

difficulty,obstacle,

challengen./v.向...挑challengebutalsoachance

taskstruggle

戰(zhàn)tolearn.

潛力/capability,prospect,Hehasthepotentialto

potentialn./adj.

潛在的possibilityopportunitybecomeagreatleader.

Gainingconfide