【公開課課件】讀后續(xù)寫五四三原則

讀后續(xù)寫指導(dǎo)：5R解讀、4句框架和3大原則（五四三法）題目：讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩端，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。

Mikelickedthelastofthemintchocolatechip

icecream.Itwasalmosttimetoleave.Hejumpedintothecarwithhis

parents

andheadedofftotheOlympic-sized

pool

forthebigswimmeet.

Whenhis

race

cameup,Mikewasconfident.Hewasstrongandswift.Mikeclimbedoutthepool,smiling.Hehadjust

won

firstplace,makinghimthefastestboyinhisagegroup.

"Congratulations,son,"hisfathersaid.Hismomgavehimahug,eventhoughhewassoakingwet.

Aweeklater,itwastimeforanotherswimmeet.Likebefore,Mikedecidedtoenjoyhisfavoriteicecreamflavor.Mikerememberedthatthelasttimehehadwonarace,healsoatemintchocolatechipicecreamfirst.Maybehe'dwinagain.

He’staken

firstplace

againinhisrace.Mikewasfeelingprettygood.Asitturnedout,MikedecidedtohavesomemintchocolatechipIcecreambeforeeveryoneofthenextfewswimmeets.Hebegantothinkofitashis

luckycharm.Afterseveralmonthsofplacinginthetoppositionsofeveryraceheswam,Mikewasfeelingunbeatable.Andhewouldn’tadmitit,butallthaticecreamwasaddingafewpoundstohisathleticswimmer'sbuild.

Itdidn’ttakelongafterthatforMiketostartcominginsecondplace-andthenthird-andthenlastplaceinhisraces.Theluckymintchocolatechipicecreamhadlostits

magic.Onthedayofhisnextswimmeet,hismothersatdownatthetablewithhim.“Mike,weallloveicecream,butit'snot

healthy

foryourbodytoeatsomuchofit.Maybeit'stimetoquitthesweettreatsforawhile,especiallybeforeyougoswimming.

Mikeunwillinglyagreed.Hewenttotheswimmeet,anddidn’t

perform

well.Hisfatherofferedtogorunningwithhimafewdaysaweektohelphimfeelbetterandstrengthenhismuscles.Theextraweightsoondisappeared,andMikefoundhimselfbreathingeasieratswimpractices.

It

was

the

last

meet

of

the

season,

and

Mike

wasn’t

sure

what

to

expect.He

felt

healthyagain,but

he

didn’t

know

if

he

still

had

any

speed

in

the

pool.

As

he

drove

into

the

water,he

kicked

his

legs

and

stretched

his

arms

as

far

as

he

could.__________________________________________________________________________________________________

His

jaw

dropped

as

he

realized

he

had

beaten

his

own

best

time,and

everyone

else

too.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________第一步：5R讀文本

Analyzethestory：

5Rs

1.Readforcharacters:

Mike,hisparents,Icecream,teammates

2.Readforconflict/problems：

IcecreamandMike’sperformance:Whetherit

isaLuckycharm3.Readforplot:單擊輸入您的封面副標(biāo)題4.Readforemotionalchanges:

Whenhisracecameup,Mikewas

confident

Mikewas

feelingprettygood.

Afterseveralmonthsofplacinginthetoppositionsofeveryraceheswam,Mikewas

feelingunbeatable.

Mike

unwillingly

agreed.

5.Readfortheme

WhatcontributestoMike’ssuccessinswimming?第二步：四句定框架：

寫讀后續(xù)寫不同于寫其它作文，有可能需要先倒著寫的

Step1:

先把最后一句寫好，即：主題句

Mikerealizedthatone‘sluckycharmwasnothingbuthisdiligence.

Step2:

再把銜接句寫好，即第一段的最后一句：

Hedashedtothefinishline.

Step3:

緊接著每段的提示語句寫角色的情感：

Ashedoveintothewater,hekickedhislegsandstretchedhisarmsasfarashecould.

Itstruckendlessenergyandmotivationintohisbody.

Mike’sjawdroppedasherealizedhehadbeatenhisownbesttime,andeveryoneelse‘stoo.

Theflowersinhisheartwerealreadyinbloom.第三部：內(nèi)容三原則

接下來就是把每段的中間補充完整記住三大原則：

1.Action—Response原則：角色A的所言、所行、所感、所想會引起其它角色的一系列反應(yīng)的。每段對話1-2句，不一定兩個人都要說話，無聲的動作也是一種response。

2.Conflict—Solution原則：一般而言第二段會有問題的solution，但本文和高考的讀后續(xù)寫文章出題不一樣，因為solution在所給文章中就已經(jīng)有了。

同時思考：能否在第一段出現(xiàn)一個問題，然后把它解決了或者沒有解決。一方面是增加看點，另一方面也是給第二段鋪墊。

3.Negative—Positive原則：寫作中一定要體現(xiàn)情感的變化，無論前面是這樣的變化，最終都是積極的。

Ashedoveintothewater,hekickedhislegsandstretchedhisarmsasfarashecould.

1.Itstruckendlessenergyandmotivationintohisbody.（心情）2.“ThisiswhereIbelong.Icanwintherace,”thoughthe,histeethclenchedandhiseyesfixedonthefinishlineforward.（內(nèi)心獨白）3.Suddenly,twofigureswhizzedpast,whichstartledhim.（心情變化））4.Fearingtofallbehind,hefelthisheartpoundedfranticallyandhismindwentblank.（解釋心情變化和問題）5.Justthen,hethoughtofhissweatandhisfather’sencouragingsmile.（問題的解決方法）6.Gradually,hisworrygavewaytohisconfidenceandthelast5minutessawhimdashtothefinishline,followedbytheendoftherace.（銜接句）

Mike’sjawdroppedasherealizedhehadbeatenhisownbesttime,andeveryoneelse’stoo.7.Theflowersinhisheartwerealreadyinbloom.

（心情變化）8.However,heknewhedeservedthehonorofchampionship.

（拓展）9.

Hisparents

cameupandgavehimahighfive,grinningfromeartoear.

（次要角色的回應(yīng)）10.“Hey,whynottryyourfavoriteicecreamandcelebrate!”saidhisfathe