河北省張垣聯(lián)盟2023-2024學年高二4月考試讀后續(xù)寫分析及下水文-合唱團關愛學生的老師Mr.Wright 講義素材

閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構成一篇完整的短文。WhenIwas12yearsold,

mygrandparentspassedaway.Iwasreallyclosetothem,andlosingthemwasthehardestthingI’veeverhadtogothrough.

Icouldn'teat,sleep,orthink;IfeltlikeIcouldn’teverbreathe.Itwasasifmywholeworldhadfallendownfromunderme,andIfellintothishugeholeofdepression.?AlthoughIwasbattlingdepression,

Iwasdeterminedtomakemyhighschoolyears

thebestofmylife.Itwasdifficulttobehappy,butIhadtotry.IjoinedWomen’sChoir(合唱團).

Mr.Wrightwasthechoraldirectorandhewassofunnythatthefirstday,IjustknewIhadmadethebestdecisionofmylife.Astheyearprogressed,Ilovedchorusmoreandmore.Ibegantosmileagainandreallyenjoylife.Thenonedaythatallchanged.

Myfriends---orthosethatIthoughtweremyfriends---startedtalkingaboutmebehindmyback.Iwashurt,andIsatbymyself.Mr.Wrightcameoverandaskedwhatwaswrong.ThelookinhiseyestoldmeIcouldtrusthim.Tryinghardtoholdbacktears,Itoldhimthewholestory.?WhenIfinished,henoddedandtoldme,“Ifyouneverlearnanythingfromme,learnthis:Nooneisworthstealingyourjoy.

”WhatMr.Wrightsaidreallystruckachord(心弦)inmyheart.Hetrulycaredaboutmeandwhatwasgoingon.Henotonlysavedmebutinfluencedeverydayofit.Ibegantorealizethatmyhappinessdidn'tdependonwhatothersthoughtofme.Islowlyletgoofthehurtandpain,andwitheachpassingday,Ifeltmyselfregainingthestrengthto

smileagain.Thechorusbecamemysanctuary(避難所)，aplacewhereIcouldlosemyselfinthebeautyofmusicandforgetabouttheworld'stroubles.注意：1.所續(xù)寫短文的詞數(shù)應為150左右；2.續(xù)寫部分分為兩段，每段的開頭語已為你寫好。Paragraph1:Outofgratitudeforallofthese,

IdecidedtowritealettertoMr.Wright.Paragraph2:Yearslater,IfollowinMr.Wright'sfootsteps,becomingachoirteachermyself.

?【考查目標】本次月考試題讀后續(xù)寫主題語境為“人與自我”，涉及“學校生活”、“認識自我，豐富自我，完善自我”、“正確的人生態(tài)度”等內(nèi)涵意義。續(xù)寫材料難度中等，但在短時間內(nèi)構思出情節(jié)合理、銜接得當?shù)亩涛娜匀徊灰?。其實，高考英語自從加入讀后續(xù)寫這個寫作試題以來，英語試卷的整體難度就提升了。考生必須加快前面題型的答題速度，才能為兩篇寫作題目節(jié)省出更多的構思空間。另外，寫作本身屬于創(chuàng)造性勞動，是稀缺資源，需要很多知識的積淀，耗費大量時間的構思，才能在最后收獲讓人眼前一亮的作品。師生關系一直是教育的熱點話題，也是各級各類考試讀后續(xù)寫題目?？嫉膬?nèi)容。上次月考提到的是老師對學生從開始的誤解到最后的理解，而本次考試是老師對學生更加正面的影響——幫助學生走出同學欺凌的陰影并影響了學生的職業(yè)選擇。

讀后續(xù)寫這個相對有創(chuàng)造性的半開放性試題要求考生在限時閱讀的基礎上，合理想象，續(xù)寫兩段文字，以使故事完整、情節(jié)合理、銜接有序和語言生動，來對抗寫作內(nèi)容的固化。我想這也是教育部教育考試院設置該題型的目的，希望考生有更多的想象空間來展示寫作水平，以讀促寫，引導高中英語教學的改革。?【文本主旨】文本講述了作者在經(jīng)歷祖父母去世和朋友的背叛后陷入悲傷，但后來在合唱團老師Mr.Wright的幫助下重新找到快樂，意識到自己的幸福不取決于別人的看法，合唱團成為了作者精神的庇護所，讓她能夠在音樂中忘卻煩惱?！纠m(xù)寫分析】

讀完文章，考生需要記住的幾個關鍵點：①作者因為加入了Mr.Wright負責的合唱團走出了失去親人的陰影，重新喚起了對生活的熱愛

②在遭受了朋友的背叛后，Mr.Wright鼓勵作者依靠自己，學會堅強

③Mr.Wright的建議和支持對學生時代的作者很重要，幫助作者度過了情緒的低谷。根據(jù)前文表述和續(xù)寫兩個段落開頭的提示，續(xù)寫內(nèi)容分析如下：

由續(xù)寫第一段開頭句Outofgratitudeforallofthese,IdecidedtowritealettertoMr.Wright.可知，本段主要闡述作者給Mr.Wright寫信時的狀態(tài)和書信內(nèi)容，可以圍繞對老師的所作所為表示感謝展開。另外，由于續(xù)寫第二段開頭提到作者多年后，也成為一名老師，所以本段還可以在信中提到未來想成為像老師的一樣人，使文章上下文更有銜接，不唐突。當然，本段也可以酌情增加Mr.Wright看到信時的反映等情節(jié)，以使續(xù)寫情節(jié)更趨飽滿。其實，對于無話可說的學生來說，本段還可以巧妙地加入對過去發(fā)生事情的重述，增加文章的銜接和粘性。

?根據(jù)續(xù)寫第二段開頭語

Yearslater,IfollowinMr.Wright'sfootsteps,becomingachoirteachermyself.可知，本段的時空和人物身份都發(fā)生了轉(zhuǎn)換。作者在Mr.Wright的影響下，也成為一名合唱團的老師。本段續(xù)寫的內(nèi)容相對開放，可以寫作者如何像Mr.Wright一樣溫暖貼心地關愛學生；也可以寫成為老師后，回去看望Mr.Wright的感人場景等。只要言之有理，情理之中，都可接受。結尾升華部分可以強調(diào)了難忘師恩對自己的影響，或者是感謝生命中黑暗時刻那些給與自己關愛的人。【下水文1】Paragraph1:

Outofgratitudeforallofthese,IdecidedtowritealettertoMr.Wright.

Onpaper,I

expressedhow

his

kindnessandwisdomhadrescuedmefromthemostchallengingperiodIhadeverfaced.Ithankedhimforteachingmethatmyhappinesswas

up

to

my

own

willingness,notdependentontheopinionsofothers.Iwantedhimtoknow

itwas

his

humorand

passionformusic

that

hadshapedmy

life,guidingmeto

beareliablepersonlikehim.ThemomentIputdownmypen,

in

relief,Ifinallyconveyedmy

deep

appreciationto

Mr.Wright,imagininghissinceresmilewhenhereadtheletter.

(97

words)

?Paragraph2:

Yearslater,IfollowinMr.Wright'sfootsteps,becomingachoirteachermyself.

Inspiredbyhisabilitytouplift

others’

spirits

throughmusic,IknewIwantedtopayforwardthesamekindnessandguidanceto

mystudents.Standinginfrontofmyownchoirclass,I

could

see

thereflection

ofmyyoungerselfintheireyes---searchingfor

comfort

andbelonging.JustasMr.Wrighthaddoneforme,I

sparednoeffort

tobeasourceofsupportand

encouragement

for

youngersouls.Everyday,Ishared

themagicofmusic

andhisgreatestwords

“Nooneisworthstealingyourjoy.”,

which

changedmylifeforever.

(96words)【下水文2】Paragraph1:Outofgratitudeforallthis,IdecidedtowritealettertoMr.Wright.

Intheletter,Iexpressedmyappreciationforwhathehaddoneforme.Duringthosedays,hiskindnessseemedlikearayofsunshineslippingthroughthewindowofmyheart.Hemademelookatthehopefulnessofmylifeandhelpedmethroughmysadnessatlosingmylovelygrandparents.Ibecamemoreoutgoingandconfident.Idon'tknowwhatwouldhavehappenedifMr.Wrighthadn'tsteppedinonthatday.Buthereallystruckachordinmyheartandencouragedmetostrugglewithlife.Atthattime,ImademyowndecisiontobecomeachoirteacherlikeMr.Wright.?Paragraph2:Yearslater,IfollowedinMr.Wright'sfootstepsandbecameachoirteachermyself.

Ioftenhelpmystudentsfacedifficulties,justasMr.Wrighthelpedme.Thatsorrowfulmemoryhasslowlyfadedfrommymind.Istilloftenlosemyselfinthebeautyofmusicandforgetabouttheworld