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..Lookingforajobafteruniversity?First,getoffthesofaMorethan650,000studentsleftuniversitythissummerandmanyhavenoideaaboutthewaytogetajob.Howtoughshouldaparentbetogalvanize通電,刺激theminthesefinanciallyfraught擔(dān)心的,憂慮的times?1InJuly,youlookedonasyourhandsome21-year-oldson,dressedingownandmortarboard,proudlyclutchedhishonorsdegreeforhisgraduationphoto.Thosememoriesofforkingout不情愿掏出thousandsofpoundsayearsothathecouldeatwellandgototheoddpartybegantofade.Untilnow.2Asthesummerbreakcomestoacloseandstudentsacrossthecountryprepareforthestartofanewterm,youfindthatyourgraduatesonisstillspendinghisdaysslumped掉落infrontofthetelevision,brokenonlybytexting,Facebookandvisitstothepub.Thisformerscion幼芽ofGenerationYhasmorphed改變overnightintoamemberofGeneratingGrunt.Willheevergetajob?3.Thisisthescenario情節(jié)facingthousandsoffamilies.Morethan650,000studentsleftuniversitythissummerandmostinthesefinanciallytestingtimeshavenoideawhattodonext.Parentsrevertto回復(fù)nagging;Sonsanddaughtersbecomerebelswithoutacause,awarethattheyneedtogetajob,butnotsurehow.4.JackGoodwin,fromMiddlesex,graduatedwitha2:1inpoliticsfromNottinghamthissummer.Hewalkedintotheuniversitycareersserviceandstraightbackoutagain;therewasabigqueue.Helivedwithfiveotherboysallofwhomdidthesame.Therewasnopressuretofindajob,eventhoughmostofthegirlsheknewhadaclearerplan.5."Iappliedforajobasapoliticalresearcher,butgotturneddown,"hesays."theywerepaying£18,000,doesn?tbuyyoumuchmorethanatinofbeansafterrent,buttheywantedpeoplewithexperienceormaster?sdegrees.ThenIappliedfortheCivilServicefaststream.Ipassedtheexam,butattheinterviewstheyaccusedmeofbeing?toodetached"andtalkinginlanguagethatwas?tootechnocratic?,whichIdidn?tthinkpossible,butobviouslyitis."6.Sincethenhehasspentthesummer"hiding".HecanrecountseveralepisodesofTrafficCopsandhasseenmoredaytimetelevisionthanishealthy.Hetalkstohisfriendsabouthisaimlessdaysandfindsthatmostareinthesameboat.Onehasbeenforcedouttostackshelvesbyhisparents.Fortherestitis9-to-5"chilling"beforeheadingtothepub.Sohowaboutworkingbehindthebar,topayforthosedrinks?"Idon?twanttodobarwork.IwenttoacomprehensiveandIworkedmybacksideofftogotoagooduniversity,whereIworkedreallyhardtogetagooddegree,"hesays."NowI?mbackatthesamestageasthosefriendswhodidn?tgotouniatall,whoarepullingpintsanddoingdead-endjobs.IfeelthatI?vecomefullcircle."7.JacquelingGoodwin,hismother,defendshim.Sheinsiststhathehastriedtogetajob,buthavingworkedfull-timesinceleavingschoolherself,sheandherhusbandfindittrickytoadvisehimonhowtoproceed."Ihavealwayshadtowork,"shesays."It?sdifficultbecausewhenyouhaveadegree,itopensnewdoorsforyou,oryou?dliketothinkthatitdoes."8.Althoughsheistakingasoftlinewithhersonatthemoment,sheisclearthatafteranupcomingthree-weektriptoSouthAmerica,hisholidayfromworkwillhavetoend.Hemayevenhavetopayrentandcontributetothehouseholdbills.9."They?vegottogrowupatsomepoint.We?vefinishedpayingforuniversity,soalittlebitofhelpbackisgood,"shesays."TheSouthAmericatripisthecutoffpoint.Whenhecomesbackthere?llbeChristmasworkifnothingelse."10.GaelLindenfield,apsychotherapistandtheauthoroftheEmotionalHealingStrategy,saysthattheGoodwinparentshavestruckexactlytherightnote.Thetransitionfromuniversitytoajobistoughforparentsandchildren:Cruciallytheymustbalancebeingpositiveandunderstandingwithnotmakinglifetoocomfortablefortheiroffspring.11"themainjobfortheparentsistobetherebecauseiftheystartadvisingthemwhattodo,thatiswhentheconflictstarts.Ifyouhavecontacts,byallmeansusethose,"shesaid."Butalotofparentsgettoosoft.Putlimitsonhowmuchmoneyyougivethem,askthemtopayrentorcontributetothecareofthehouseorthepets.Carryonlifeasnormalanddon?tallowthemtoabuseyourbankaccountorsapyourreservesofemotionalenergy."12payingforcareerconsultations,trainfarestointerviewsorbooksaregoodthings;beingtoopushyisnot.Butwhileparentsshouldbewaryofbecomingtoosoft,Lindenfieldadvisesthemtotread踩sympatheticallyafterajobsetbackforafewdaysorevenweeks–dependingonthescaleoftheknock.Afterthatthesonordaughterneedstobenudged推動(dòng)firmlybackintothesaddle.13boysaremorelikelytogetstuckathome.Lingenfieldbelievesthatmenareoftenbetterathelpingtheirsons,nephews,orfriends?sonsthanaremothersandsisters.Menhaveadifferentwayofhandlingsetbacksthanwomen,shesays,sotheyneedthemalepresencetotalkitthrough.14asforbarwork,sheisapassionateadvocate:it?sagreatantidote解毒劑tograduateapathy冷漠.Itjustdependsonhowyouapproachit.Lindenfield,whofoundherfirstjobasanaerialphotographicassistantthroughbarwork,saysitisagreatnetworkingopportunityandcertainlymorelikelytogetyouajobthanlounginginfrontoftheTV.15"Thesamegoesforshelf-stacking.Youwillbespottedifyou?regoodatit.Ifyou?rebrightandcheerfulandarepolitetothecustomers,you?llsoongetmovedon.Sothinkofitasanopportunity;peoplewhoaresuccessfulinthelongrunhaveoftengotshelf-stackingstories,"shesays.16yoursonordaughtermaynotwanttofollowHollywoodstarssuchasWhoopiGoldbergintoapplyingmake-uptocorpses尸體inamortuary太平間,orguardingnuclearpowerplantslikeBruceWills,butevenBradPitthadtostandoutsideElPolloLocorestaurantchaininagiantchickensuitatonetimeinhislife.Noneofthemappearsthepoorerfortheseexperiences.Danger!Booksmaychangeyourlife1LikeLewisCarroll'sAlice,whofallsintoarabbitholeanddiscoversamysteriouswonderland,whenwepickupabookweareabouttoenteranewworld.Webecomeobserversoflifefromthepointofviewofapersonolderthanourselves,orthroughtheeyesofachild.Wemaytravelaroundtheglobetocountriesorcultureswewouldneverdreamofvisitinginreallife.We'llhaveexperienceswhicharenew,sometimesdisconcerting,maybedeeplyattractive,possiblyunpleasantorpainful,butneverlessthanliberatingfromtherealworldwecomefrom.2TheEnglishpoetWilliamCowper<1731–1800>said"Variety'stheveryspiceoflife,/thatgivesitallitsflavour"althoughheneglectedtosaywhereorhowwecouldfindit.Butweknowhewasright.Weknowweliveinaworldofvarietyanddifference.Weknowthatpeoplelivevariousdifferentlives,spendtheirtimeinvariousdifferentways,havedifferentjobs,believeindifferentthings,havedifferentopinions,differentcustoms,andspeakdifferentlanguages.Normally,wedon'tknowtheextentofthesedifferences,yetsometimeswhensomethingunusualhappenstomakeusnotice,varietyanddifferenceappearmoreasathreatthananopportunity.3Readingbooksallowsustoenjoyandcelebratethisvarietyanddifferenceinsafety,andprovidesuswithanopportunitytogrow.Tointeractwithotherpeople'slivesinthepeaceandquietofourhomesisaprivilegewhichonlyreadingfictioncanaffordus.Weevenunderstand,howeverfleetingly,thatwehavemoreincommonwithotherreadersofbooksinotherculturesthanwemightdowiththefirstpersonwemeetwhenwestepoutofourfrontdoors.Welearntolookbeyondourimmediatesurroundingstothehorizonandalandscapefarawayfromhome.4Ifweeverquestionthetruthofthepowerofreadingbooks,weshouldtakethetroubletogotoourlocallibraryorbookshop,oreven,ifwe'refortunateenough,tothebooksonourshelvesathome.Weshouldwonderatthestrikingvistascreatedbythetitlesofnovelsrangingfromtheclassicstothemostrecent:TheGrapesofWrathbyJohnSteinbeck,TheFourthHandbyJohnIrving,CancerWardbyAleksandrSolzhenitsyn,ForWhomtheBellTollsbyErnestHemingway,OurManinHavanabyGrahamGreene,TheTimeTraveller'sWifebyAudreyNiffeneggerorSalmonFishingintheYemenbyPaulTorday.Thenweshouldreflectontheotherliveswe'llmeetoncewebegintoread.5Everybookwillhaveitsownlanguageanddialect,itsownvocabularyandgrammar.Wemaynotalwaysunderstandeverywordorsentence,butwhetherwe'reenchantedorwhetherwefeelexcluded,ouremotionsareneverthelessstimulated.Otherpeopleandotherculturesarenotalwaysdistantbecauseofgeography.Inabookwemayconfrontpeoplewholiveinadifferentclimate,havedifferentreligiousbeliefs,orcomefromadifferentethnicgroup.Evenourneighboursdowntheroadmaybestrangerswhowecanonlymeetthroughbooks.6Assoonasweareabletolisten,booksaresupremelyinfluentialinthewaywelive.Fromthebedtimestoryreadbyaparenttotheirchildallthewaythroughtothesittingroomlinedwithbooksinouradulthomes,booksdefineourlives.TheEnglishwriterE.M.Forster<1879–1970>evenhintedatamoremysticalpowerwhichbookspossessoverus.Hewrote,"Isuggestthattheonlybooksthatinfluenceusarethoseforwhichweareready,andwhichhavegonealittlefurtherdownourparticularpaththanwehavegoneourselves."It'sasiftherightbookcomestoseekusoutattherightmoment,andoffersitselftous—it'snotuswhoseekoutthebook.7ThomasMerton<1915–1968>,theAmericanmonk,priestandwriter,wasonceaskedaseriesofsevenquestionsbyajournalist:Namethelastthreebooksyouhaveread,thethreebooksyouarereadingnow,thebooksyouintendtoread,thebooksthathaveinfluencedyou,andwhy,abookthateveryoneshouldread,andwhy.Forthebookswhichhadinfluencedhim,hecitedpoeticworksofWilliamBlake,variousplaysbyancientGreekthinkersandwriters,andanumberofreligiouswritings.Whenaskedwhytheyhadinfluencedhim,hereplied,"Thesebooksandotherslikethemhavehelpedmetodiscovertherealmeaningofmylife,andhavemadeitpossibleformetogetoutoftheconfusionandmeaninglessnessofanexistencecompletelyimmersedintheneedsandpassivitiesfosteredbyacultureinwhichsalesareeverything."8Sohowwouldyouanswerthequestions?9In1947,CliftonFadimancoinedthetermhome-runbook.Whenabaseballplayerhitsahomerun,hehitstheballsohardandsofarhe'sabletorunroundthefourbasesofthediamond,andscorepointsnotonlyforhimselfbutfortheotherrunnersalreadyonabase.It'sthemostenjoyableandsatisfyingeventinabaseballgame.Likewise,ahome-runbookdescribesnotthechild'sfirstreadingexperience,butthefirsttimetheyreadabookwhichinducessuchpleasureandsatisfactionthattheycan'tputitdown.Forhundredsofmillionsofchildrenaroundtheworld,thebestknownexampleofahome-runbookwillbetheHarryPotterstories.10Asadults,we'realwayslookingforourownhome-runbooks,notjustforthefirsttime,buttimeaftertimeagain.Whoeverhasreadanovelinonesittingwillalwaysrememberthepleasureandsatisfactionwhichawaitus,andeagerly,insistently,sometimesevendesperatelyseekstoreproducethemarvelloussensationagain.Wecannotwithstandthehungertovisitanotherworld,tomeetdifferentpeople,toliveotherlivesandtoreflectonourselves.11Danger!Booksmaychangeyourlife.Suchisthepowerofreading.Unit3Fiftyyearsoffashion1Nohistoryoffashionintheyears1960to2010canoverlookorunderestimatetwoconstantfactors:theubiquitousjeansandtheriseandfallofhemlinesforwomen'sskirtsanddresses.2Denim,thematerialwhichjeansaremadeof,wasknowninFranceinthelate16thcentury,butitwasLeviStrausswhosawthatminersintheCaliforniangoldrushinthemid-19thcenturyneededstrongtrousers,whichhereinforcedwithmetalrivets.BluedenimjeansremainedpopularintheUSasworkclothesuntilthe1950s,butthenbecameassociatedwithyouth,newideas,rebellionandindividuality.WhenLeviStrauss&CobegantoexportbluejeanstoEuropeandAsiainthelate1950s,theywereboughtandwornwithhugeenthusiasmbyyoungpeopleandrecognizedasasymboloftheyoung,informalAmericanwayoflife.3Hemlineshaveamorepeculiarsignificanceduringthisperiod.Ithasoftenbeennotedthatthereisaprecisecorrelation,withonlyafewexceptions,betweenthelengthofwomen'sskirtsandtheeconomy.Asthestockmarketrises,sodohemlines,andwhenitfalls,sodothey.Exactlywhywomenshouldwanttoexposemoreorlessoftheirlegsduringperiodsofeconomicboomandbustremainsamystery.Butthegeneraltrendisinescapable.Whenevertheeconomicoutlookisunsettled,bothmenandwomentendtowearmoreconservativeclothes.4Perhapsthemostimportantdevelopmentinfashioninthe1960swastheminiskirt,inventedbytheBritishdesignerMaryQuant.BecauseQuantworkedintheheartofSwingingLondon,theminiskirtdevelopedintoamajorinternationalfashion.ItwasgivengreaterrespectabilitywhenthegreatFrenchdesigner,Courrèges,developeditintoanitemofhighfashion.Butitwouldnothaveachievedsuchinternationalcurrencywithoutthedevelopmentoftights,insteadofstockings,becausetheriseinhemlinesmeantthestockingtopswouldbevisible.5Thehippiemovementofthemid-1960sandearly1970sinfluencedthedesignofjeans,withthetrouserlegdevelopingaflared"bell-bottom"style.Bythemid-1970s,astheeconomydeteriorated,hemlinesdroppedtomidi<mid-calflength>andmaxi<anklelength>,whilejeanswerenolongerexclusivelyblue.6Jeansremainedfashionableduringtheperiodofpunk,usuallywornripped,oftenwithchainsandstuddedbelts.Thelooklastedforseveralyears,althoughbecamemoreandmorerestrictedtosmallgroupsofinner-cityyoungpeople,andhadlittleinfluenceonotheragegroups.7Asabacklashtotheanarchyofpunk,theNewRomanticswasafashionmovementwhichoccurredmainlyinBritishnightclubs.Itwasglamorousandcourageous,andfeaturedlavishfrilledshirts.Jeansweredefinitelynotacceptable.8Themid-1980ssawtheriseofanumberofdifferentstyles.Powerdressingwascharacterizedbysmartsuitsand,forthenewly-empoweredwomen,shoulderpadsandknee-lengthskirts.Notsurprisingly,theeconomywasunstable,andpeopletooklessrisksinwhattheywore.Formen,theMiamiVicestyle,namedafterthetelevisionseries,madeuseofsmartT-shirtsunderdesignerjackets,anddesignerstubble—threeorfourdaysofbeardgrowth.Butasalways,denimremainedpopularwiththeyoung.Inparticular,heavymetalmusicfansworebleachedandrippedjeansanddenimjackets.9Graduallyhemlinesstartedtoriseagain...untiltheworldstockmarketcrashin1987.Sothelate1980sintheUSsawtheriseofthemoreconservativestylecalledPreppystyle,withclassicclothesbyRalphLaurenandBrooksBrothersformen,button-downshirts,chinosandloafers,withasweatertiedlooselyaroundtheneck.Theyalsoworejeans,buteitherbrand-neworcleanandsmartlypressed—notatallwhatLeviStraussoriginallyintended.10Astheworldeconomiesimprovedagaininthe1990s,fashionforyoungpeoplebecamemoredaring.BootsandConverseorNiketrainersremainedpopular,butthepredominantcoloursbecameolivegreenandoatmeal.Hairwaswornlong,orcutspikyshortanddyedblue,greenorred.Hoodies,baseballcapsandbaggyjeans,whichwereoftenwornlowbelowthebuttocks,werecommononthestreets.11TheninJanuary2000theNewYorktechnologystockmarketcollapsed.Asusual,sodidhemlines,whichweredescribedbyonecommentatoras"theprimandproperlookisin.Skirtsshouldbebelowtheknee."Butmerelyoneyearlater,thestockmarketbegantorecover,andthemicrominiskirtreturned.Hemlineswerehigherthantheyhadbeenformanyyears.12Duringthisperiod,itwasunusualtowearformalclothesunlessyouwereatwork.Designerjeansgainedhugepopularity.Theseweremadeofthetraditionaldenim,perhapswithsomelycraadded,butcutandmarketedunderwell-knownbrandssuchasArmani,HugoBossandMoschino,whountilrecentlyhadonlyconcernedthemselveswiththesmartestfashionlines.SkinnyjeansalsobecamepopularinBritainandmostofEurope.Skirtlengthisuncertain,rangingfrommicroto"sensible"—knee-lengthorjustbelow.13Sometimesthehemlineindicator,asit'scalled,canevenprecedeandpredictachangeinthemoodofthestockmarketlongbeforeitactuallyhappens.InSeptember2007,attheNewYorkfashionshows,whichweredisplayingtheirstylesforspring2008,thetrendwasformuchlongerdressesandskirts,manytomid-calforevendowntotheankles.Somepeoplefeltthisshowedthatthehemlineindicatorwasnolongerreliable,andthatdesignersnolongerdictatedwhatpeoplewouldwear.DuringtheLondonandNewYorkfashionshowsinSeptember2008,hemlinescontinuedtodrop.Butsureenough,inthefallof2008,thestockmarketindexesfelldramaticallywhenthebankingcrisishittheUS,Europeandthentherestoftheworld.Hemlineswerenolongerfollowingthestockmarket—theywereshowingthewayandindicatingfutureeconomictrends.14Duringthewholeperiod,fashionstyleshaverangedwidely,andhaveusuallybeensparkedoffbyadesiretoidentifypeopleasbelongingtoaparticularsub-culture.Buttheconstantfactorsoverthisperiodaredenimandhemlinesandthegreatestinfluenceshavebeena19th-centuryCalifornianclothesmanufacturerandayoungdesignerintheSwingingLondonofthe1960s.Unit4Thecreditcardtrap1Ihaveaconfession.Severalyearsago,Iwasstandinginaqueuetocollectsometheatreticketsformyfamily,andmyfriendwasdoingthesameforhers.Igotmine,andpaidforthembycreditcard,feelingcontentedbytheconvenienceofthiscash-freetransaction.Itwasthenherturntopay.Thewholeoperationpassedassmoothlyasmine,butmydelightsoonturnedtoabjectshame.Mycreditcardwasafairlypathetic,status-freedarkblue,whereasherswasaveryexclusivegoldone.2Howdidshedothis?Howcouldthisbe?IknewIearnedmorethanher,mycarwasnewer,andmyhousewassmarter.Howdidshegettoappearmoreflashthanme?3Now,Ihadajobwhichwasassteadyasanyjobwasinthosedays–that'stosay,notvery,butyouknow,nocomplaints.Ihadamortgageonmyhouse,butthenwhodidn't?Ipaidoffallmycreditdebtattheendofthemonth,soalthoughtechnically,Iwasindebttothecreditcardcompany,itwasonlyforamatterofafewweeks.SoIassumedIhadagoodcreditrating.4Callmesuperficial,andI'mnotproudofmyself,butthereandthen,Iwassuddenlyjealousofmyfriend.IdecidedInolongerwantedabluecard.Iwantedagoldone.Agoldcardwassuddenlyindispensable,itwouldmakemefeelgoodwithmyself,anddesirabletoothers.5SoIappliedforthemostdistinctive,shinygoldencardthecompanyoffered.6Iwasturneddown.7WhenIhadrecoveredfromtheshock,whichtookseveralseconds,Iaskedwhy.ItappearsthatbecauseIpaymycreditcardbillbothontimeandinfull,I'mnotthekindofpersonthattheywanttohavetheirgoldcreditcard.Theytargetpeoplewhoarepronetoimpulse-buying,andpotentiallybadcreditrisks,temptedtospendmorethantheyhave,andliabletofallbehindwithrepayments.Thentheycanchargethemmoreinterest,andearnmoremoney.That'sthewaytheydobusiness.8Sodoesthisexplainwhythecreditcardcompaniesareluringimpoverishedstudentswithunrealisticinterestrates,likemykids?9Threeweeksago,No.2daughtercamehomefromuniversityfortheweekend.She'sinhersecondtermofherfirstyear.Shehasastudentloanof£3,000,likemostofherfriends,andasmallallowancefromherpoormother<ha!>fortransport,books,livingexpenses.Shewearsclothesfromthelocalcharityshops,andrarelygoesout.Shehuggedme<neverusuallydoesthat>andthensaid,"Mum,Ineedtotalktoyou."10"Whatisit,darling?Tellmeeverything."11"I'veappliedforacreditcard,andIneedsomeonetoactasaguaranteeforme.IsitOKifIputdownyourname?Thankssomuch,Mum,mustdash!Bye."12AfterI'dhauledherbackintothehouse,ittranspiredthatherbankhadwrittentoherofferingacreditcardatalowinterestforatrialthree-monthperiod,subjecttosuitability...andsoon.Herbank!Itrustedthem!TheyknowevenbetterthanIdohowbrokesheis.13Here’saseriousquestion.Whydotheycallthemcreditcardswhenitwouldbemoreaccuratetocallthemdebtcards?14Here'sanevenmoreseriousstory.Anotherfriend'sdaughter,Kelly,wasstudyingmodernlanguagesatuniversity,andspentayearoverseas.Atsomepointintheyear,therewasachangeofprocedure,andKelly'sbankfailedtoallowhertoaccessherfundsinhercurrentaccount,becausetherequestwasfromoutsidetheUK.Naturally,therewasalengthycorrespondencewhileshetriedtosortthisout,sothedelayinbeingabletoaccessherfundsmeantthatshewentintothered,andherdebtsbegantorisemorethan£200abovetheagreedlimitonheroverdraftof£1,500.15WhenKellygotbackhome,thebankchargedher£100forgoingoverthelimit,andinsistedshepaid£30amonthtobringthebalancebacktobelowherlimit.Theyomittedtotellherthatshewasn'tactuallypayingoffthedebt,butonlytheexorbitantinterestontheoverspendoftheoverdraft.16SoKellyhadtoturntohercreditcardwhichshehadusedsensiblyandsparinglyuntilthatpoint.Becauseshewasastudent,andbecauseshedidn'tuseitmuch,naturallyhercreditlimitwaslow.17Andnotsurprisingly,shecouldn’tpayoffeventheminimumpaymentonhercreditcardbill.Sotherewerenotonlybankchargesowing,butalsocreditcarddebtsandinterest.Andofcourse,shewasrecordedasbeingabadcreditrisk.18Thingsthenwentfrombadtoworse.Afewmonthsintoherfinalyear,thebanknotifiedherthatitwasgoingtoreduceheroverdraftfrom£1,500to£1,000.Theytoldhertoapplyforastudentloantocovertherest.Butwhentheloancompanydidacreditcheck,theydiscoveredthecarddebt.19Guesswhat?Shedidn'tgettheloan.20Thiswasadelightfulkidwhohadgreatrestraintwithherspendingandwaseconomicalaboutherlifestyle.Shedidn'tgoonspendingspreesbuyingnewshoes,andshedidn'tusehercreditcardasif<unlikeme>itwasafashionitem.Sheusedittobuyfood,tosurvive.21Andwhathappened?Shehadtodropoutofuniversity22IwishtherewasahappyendingtoKelly'sstory,althoughmaybetherewillbe.Forthemoment,she'sworkinginthelocalsupermarket,andit'sprobablethatshe'llhaveanothergoatuniversitywhenshehaspaidoffherdebts.23Sothisiswhatthebanksdo.Theysettrapswhichappealtoourvanityandgreedandsometimestoourbasicneedforsurvival.Andthenwhenwefallintothetraptheyshout"Gotyou!Didn'tyourealizeitwasatrap?"24Andherewearetoday,caughtinthecreditcrunch,withworldeconomiesinfreefall,allbecausethewickedbankerssetustrapswhichwefellinto,attractinguswithendlesspublicityforloansofmoneywhicheventheydidn'thave!Itnowappearstheywereborrowingontheirownflashygoldcreditcardstoo.25SoIhaveasolutiontothecreditcardtrap,andIwantallofyoutolistentomeverycarefully.26Iwantyoutolayoutallofyourcreditcardsinaline,takealargepairofscissorsandcutthemintosmallpieces.Thenputtheminanenvelopeandsendthemtoyourbank,withalettersaying<moreorless>"Itrustedyouandyoudeceivedme.You'vegotthewholeworldintothisridiculouscreditcardtrap,andifInowcutyourcardsinhalf,andtakeawayyourpotentialtotemptmoneyawayfromhonestpeoplelikeme,maybeitwillbeyourturntolearnwhatit'sliketorunoutofcash."27Asforme,Idon'twantanymorecreditcards,nomorestatussymbols,nomorebadfeelingsaboutwishingIcouldshowhowsuperiorIamtoothers.I'mnotgoingtoyearnanymoreforwhatIcannotaffordorcannothave.SexDifferencesinEnglishGossipRules1Contrarytopopularbelief,researchershavefoundthatmengossipjustasmuchaswomen.InoneEnglishstudy,bothsexesdevotedthesameamountofconversationtime<about65percent>tosocialtopicssuchaspersonalrelationships;inanother,thedifferencewasfoundtobequitesmall,withgossipaccountingfor55percentofmaleconversationtimeand67percentoffemaletime.Assportandleisurehavebeenshowntooccupyabout10percentofconversationtime,discussionoffootballcouldwellaccountforthedifference.2Menwerecertainlyfoundtobenomorelikelythanwomentodiscuss"important"or"highbrow"subjectssuchaspolitics,work,artandculturalmatters–except<andthiswasastrikingdifference>whenwomenwerepresent.Ontheirown,mengossip,withnomorethanfivepercentofconversationtimedevotedtonon-socialsubjectssuchasworkorpolitics.Itisonlyinmixed-sexgroups,wheretherearewomentoimpress,thattheproportionofmaleconversationtimedevotedtothesemore"highbrow"subjectsincreasesdramatically,tobetween15and20percent.3 Infact,recentresearchhasrevealedonlyonesignificantdifference,intermsofcontent,betweenmaleandfemalegossip:Menspendmuchmoretimetalkingaboutthemselves.Ofthetotaltimedevotedtoconversationaboutsocialrelationships,menspendtwothirdstalkingabouttheirownrelationships,whilewomenonlytalkaboutthemselvesonethirdofthetime.4 Despitethesefindings,themythisstillwidelybelieved,particularlyamongmales,thatmenspendtheirconversations"solvingtheworld'sproblems",whilethewomenfolkgossipinthekitchen.Inmyfocusgroupsand
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