專題12-2021年北京卷英語真題作文深度點(diǎn)評(píng)與滿分作文賞析

專題12-2021年北京卷英語真題作文深度點(diǎn)評(píng)與滿分作文賞析【試題再現(xiàn)】假設(shè)你是紅星中學(xué)高三學(xué)生李華。你和英國好友Jim原定本周末一起外出，你因故不能赴約。請(qǐng)你用英文給他寫一封電子郵件，內(nèi)容包括：1.表達(dá)歉意并說明原因；2.提出建議并給出理由。注意：1.詞數(shù)100左右；2.開頭和結(jié)尾已給出，不計(jì)入總詞數(shù)。DearJim,__________________________________________________________________________Yours,LiHua【試題解讀】1.從內(nèi)容上來說，本篇作文需要考生給出一個(gè)合理的“理由”以及“解決方案”。一般情況下，“受傷”這個(gè)理由是最容易被對(duì)方接受的。不過，在寫作時(shí)，“傷”要合理，而且要盡量與之后的“解決方案”匹配。比如，如果你的“傷”是骨折，而給出的“解決方案”是下周再一起出去，那么顯然就是不合理的。所以考生們?cè)趯懽鲿r(shí)，需要設(shè)計(jì)要點(diǎn)，讓作文合情合理。2.從語言上來說，今年的這篇英語作文有較為嚴(yán)格的字?jǐn)?shù)要求，要控制在100~120字之間。由于內(nèi)容相對(duì)簡單，所以考生在寫作時(shí)，只要能保證不出現(xiàn)語法或拼寫錯(cuò)誤，就會(huì)有一個(gè)比較保險(xiǎn)的分?jǐn)?shù)。如果能在作文中寫出一些漂亮的詞匯或短語，如apology/makeupfor/besorryforanyinconveniencecaused等，分?jǐn)?shù)就不會(huì)太低。除了內(nèi)容和細(xì)節(jié)之外，考生還應(yīng)該在作文中加入體現(xiàn)“交際感”的句子，如“Wouldyoumindif…?””Pleaseallowmetosaysorryagain.”“IamsorryIcannot…andItrustthatyouwillbeabletounderstand.“等。3.考生最后需要考慮的一個(gè)角度是結(jié)構(gòu)。本篇作文符合應(yīng)用文經(jīng)典的三段式，首段交代寫作背景，表達(dá)寫作目的，次段指出未能赴約原因，尾段給出補(bǔ)救方案，表明理由，并再次表達(dá)歉意。要想讓作文脫穎而出，考生還要關(guān)注連接成分的使用，如遞進(jìn)、因果等結(jié)構(gòu)?？傮w來說，2021年高考北京卷英語作文相對(duì)比較簡單，考生只要能平穩(wěn)心態(tài)，考前按部就班的復(fù)習(xí)，那么順利完成這篇作文，應(yīng)該是比較容易的事情。【滿分范文欣賞1】DearJim,Iamwritingtomakeasincereapologytoyou01thatIwillnotbeabletoattendthephotographicexhibition02whichisscheduledtotakeplace03thisSaturday.Idofeelbadaboutinformingyouonsuchashortnotice04,butIneedtohaveaphysicalcheckup05thisSaturdayafternoonandIalmostforgot.Tovisittheexhibition06,firstyouneedtotakethebusandthenchangesubwaylinestwice.Itiskindofcomplicated.Consideringthat07youhaveonlybeeninBeijingforaweekandarelikelyto08haveaproblemgettingaround,Icouldaskmycousin,whowasbornandbredinBeijing09,togowithyoutotheexhibitionvenue10.NotonlyishefamiliarwithBeijing,heisfluentinEnglishaswell11.Inotherwords,hecouldbeyourperfecttourguide.IfmycousinisnotavailableonSaturday,asalastresort12,wemightgotothephotographicexhibitionsomeothertime.Ihearthatitwillbeheldagainnextmonth.Anyway,Iamsorryagain13fornotbeingabletogowithyouthistime,butdonothesitateto14contactmeifIcanbeofanyfurtherhelp15.Yours,LiHua【范文解析】01.開門見山地說明寫信的原因，makeasincereapology可看作besorry的升級(jí)版。02.photographicexhibition，攝影展。這樣寫顯得較為具體，比party或show好一些。而且這兩個(gè)詞比較長，能充分體現(xiàn)考生的英語功底。03.可看作是whichwillbegin的升級(jí)版。04.informsomebodyonsuchashortnotice，臨時(shí)通知某人，高級(jí)表達(dá)。05.haveaphysicalcheckup，體檢。比爸媽生病了需要人照顧等理由好一些，不落俗套。06.狀語提前，盡量用不同的結(jié)構(gòu)作為一個(gè)句子的開頭。07.分詞結(jié)構(gòu)，書面表達(dá)加分項(xiàng)。08.belikelyto，有可能。可作為下面might的替換版本，增加句法多樣性。09.插入語，增加句法多樣性；bornandbred押頭韻，書面表達(dá)加分項(xiàng)。exhibitionvenue，展覽的地點(diǎn)，高級(jí)表達(dá)。倒裝句，書面表達(dá)加分項(xiàng)。asalastresort，萬不得已，高級(jí)表達(dá)。再次道歉，體現(xiàn)誠意。donothesitateto，盡管，相當(dāng)于feelfreeto，高級(jí)表達(dá)。beofanyfurtherhelp，可看作help的升級(jí)版?！緷M分范文欣賞2】DearJim,Howiseverythinggoing?WehaveplannedtogoforawalkinHaidianParkthisweekend,wherewecouldenjoythebeautifulsceneryofearlyspring.ButIamafraidIcouldn’tmakeit.Iwasseverelyinjuredinasoccergamelastnight.ThedoctorexaminedmecarefullyandtoldmethatIhadtostayinbedforatleastoneweek.IaskedhimwhethertherewasanypossibilitythatIcouldrecoverfaster,yettheanswerwasnegative.Myconditiondoesn’tallowmetogoanywhereuntilmylegsarefullyrecovered.ItisapityformetomissthistripthatIhavebeenlongingfor.Shallweputitoffuntilnextweekendiftheweatherpermits?Lookingforwardtoyourreply.Yours,LiHua【滿分范文欣賞3】DearJim,Iapologizefornotbeingabletogooutwithyouthisweekend.Igotdrenchedfromthepouringrainyesterdayandsubsequently,Icaughtaheavycold.ThedoctorsuggestedthatIstayinbedforthenextfewdays.Howaboutwegooutnextweekend?IheardthereisanewSichuan

restaurantopeningnextSaturday.

Whydon'twetryitout?Afterthat,wecangohikinginthenearbyhills.Icheckedtheweatherforecastandnextweekendwillhavefantasticweather.Iapologizeagainforhavingtocancelthisweekend'splanandIlookforwardtoseeingyounextSaturday.Yours,

LiHua【滿分范文欣賞4】DearJim,Ihopethisemailfindsyouingoodhealthandspirit.IamwritingtoinformyouthatIwon'tbeabletoattendyourconcertthisweekend.Theschoolreleasedourexaminationscheduleanhourback,andIhaveamathstestonMonday.YouareawareofhowdeplorableIamatmaths.Iamsorryforcancelingatsuchshortnotice.Iwanttomakeituptoyou.WecantrythenewThaiplacenearyourofficenextweekend.Ifyouareavailable,Iwillbookatableforus.Yours,LiHua.【滿分范文欣賞5】DearJim,Howiseverythinggoing?WehaveplannedtogoforawalkinHaidianParkthisweekend,wherewecouldenjoythebeautifulsceneryofearlyspring.ButIamafraidIcouldn’tmakeit.Iwasseverelyinjuredinasoccergamelastnight.ThedoctorexaminedmecarefullyandtoldmethatIhadtostayinbedforatleastoneweek.IaskedhimwhethertherewasanypossibilitythatIcouldrecoverfaster,yettheanswerwasnegative.Myconditiondoesn’tallowmetogoanywhereuntilmylegsarefullyrecovered.ItisapityformetomissthistripthatIhavebeenlongingfor.Shallweputitoffuntilnextweekendiftheweatherpermits?Lookingforwardtoyourreply.Yours,LiHua【滿分范文欣賞6】DearJim,I’msorrytoinformyouthatIcan’tgooutwithyouthisweekend.I’vejustbeentoldthatIhavetogoandvisitmysickgrandfatherinthecountryside,whowassuddenlyadmittedtothehospital.Ihopethechangewon’tcauseyoutoomuchtrouble.HowaboutgoingoutnextSaturdaymorning?Ifit’sconvenientforyou,let’sm