讀后續(xù)寫之漂流瓶的故事講義-高三英語一輪復習

讀后續(xù)寫||漂流瓶的故事續(xù)寫原題2021年4月杭州二模閱讀下面短文，根據(jù)所給情節(jié)進行續(xù)寫，使之構成一個完整的故事。ItwasonSeptember5th,my

birthday,thatweleftCambridgeandmovedaway.Wewenttotheseaside,toourholidayhouse,whichwasnowtobeourpermanenthome.Irememberthedaywascoldandgrey,

withalightrainfallingslowlybutconstantly.My

father

droveinsilence.Noonespokeandallwecouldhearwasthesoundofthetyresonthewetroad.Whenwegottothesmallhousenearthesea,mymotherquietlystartedtounpackthefewthingswehadbroughtwithus.Carol,JulieandIwentdowntothebeach.Wesaidweweregoingtolookforcrabsintherockpoolsbutactually,wejustwantedtogetawayfromourfatherandhiscold

silence.

Weclimbedalongtherocksbythesideofthebeach.JulieandCarolbecameinterestedinsomeshellstheyfoundinoneofthepools.Iwanderedaway,lostinmyprivatethoughts.Itwasmybirthday,butnoonehadsaid“HappyBirthday”tome.Ihadnot

received

anycardsor

presents.Iwalkeddowntotheseashore,wherethewaveswerebreakinglazilyagainstthemuddysand.Suddenly,Isawsomethinggreenstickingoutofthewater.I

looked

atitmorecarefully.Thegreenthingmovedcloserandclosertotheshore,andwhenitwasalmostnearenoughformeto

touch,Irealizedwhatitwas.Itwasa

bottle.Iwentoverandpickeditup,allthetimelookingatit.Itseemedold,andhadnolabelonit.Then

Irealized

therewassomethinginside.

Slowly,Ipulledoutthewetcorkfromthetopofthebottle.Insidewasapieceofpaper.Withgreatcare,Itookoutthefoldedpaperandopenedit.Writtenonitwerethesewords

：“Towhomsoeverfindsthisbottle,Ipromiseyouanew

friend,"注意：1.所續(xù)寫短文的詞數(shù)應為150詞左右；2.應使用5個以上短文中標有下劃線的關鍵詞；3.續(xù)寫部分分為兩段，每段的開頭語已為你寫好；4.續(xù)寫完成后，請用下劃線標出你所使用的關鍵詞語。Paragraph1:Istaredatthepaperandthenlookedaround.Paragraph2:AsIopenedmyeyes,Ifoundmyfatherstandingrightbesideme.思路分析上周拿到續(xù)寫的題目，看完后，是有點懵逼的。心里就在想，又難為學生了。仔細看了第二遍，大概做了構思，就去上課了。提綱列在紙上，拖延癥到今天上午才寫好整篇。構思步驟如下：一、原文情節(jié)梳理1、“我”生日那天，全家搬到海邊的小房子；2、搬家路上天氣陰冷，父親心情不好，一路沉默不說話；3、沒有人記得“我”的生日，或者給我送生日禮物，“我”非常難過；4、來到海邊的家，我和兄弟們?yōu)榱颂颖芨赣H的冷漠，來到海邊抓螃蟹；5、“我”獨自在海邊溜達，卻撿到了一個漂流瓶，里面的紙條上寫著“可以給撿到瓶子的人帶來新朋友?！倍⒃拿茳c/焦點“我”生日當天全家搬家到海邊小房子。沒有人記得我的生日，和“我”內(nèi)心的失落難過形成對比。真的沒有人記得我的生日么？三、確定文章主題我確定了文章的主題是親情。四、續(xù)寫的可能結局生日驚喜，爸媽只是忙于家中瑣事，但并沒有忘記。家人之間的愛。五、續(xù)寫情節(jié)推斷Paragraph1:Istaredatthepaperandthenlookedaround.1.

尋找朋友的急切心情。（期盼、期待）2.

沒有找到朋友的失落。（傷心，難過）Paragraph2AsIopenedmyeyes,Ifoundmyfatherstandingrightbesideme.3.父親過來尋找我們回家（失落）4.爸媽準備的小的生日驚喜，明白漂流瓶里“朋友”就是身邊家人。（釋懷，溫暖）六、續(xù)寫涉及到的主要情緒

期盼、期待、傷心、失落、開心、釋懷此外，這篇文章的原文有一些環(huán)境描寫，加上作者是在海邊，所以根據(jù)這個細節(jié)，可以添加環(huán)境描寫。1.Thewindfromtheseawasstillcoldandfrigid,constantlyblowingandwhippingontoourfaces.

海風刺骨寒冷，不斷鞭打在我們的臉上。2.Theskyisovercast,darkenedwithgloomyclouds.

天空烏云密布。3.

Theskywasacurdledgrayburdenedwithlumpsofclouds.

天空是昏暗的灰色，濃云密布。4.

Theskyclearsup.

天放晴了。5.Thesunshonethroughabreakintheclouds.

陽光透過云層的縫隙照下來。寫作步驟我一般給學生講解的作文，都會老老實實把腦子的畫面感先用中文描述一遍，還會打出來，對著中文去寫英文。學生看著會更清晰。Paragraph1:Istaredatthepaperandthenlookedaround.1.

然而，讓我沮喪的是周圍除了一望無際的大海，什么人也沒有。However,whatmademefeelgloomierwasthattherewasnooneherebuttheboundlesssea.2.沿著海岸往回走，我內(nèi)心想著，或許還能找到新朋友。Walkingdowntheseashore,Ihadamillionthoughtsrunningthroughmymind,“MaybeIcanfindmynew

friends

inthedistance.”3.走了會兒，我停下腳步，坐在沙灘上。海風陰冷，任由它打在臉上。Havingwalkedforawhile,Icametoastop,sittingonthebeach.Thewindfromtheseawasstillcoldandfrigid,constantlyblowingandwhippingontomyface.4.盯著手里的瓶子，我喃喃自語，“真可笑?。　癝taringatthe

bottle,Imurmuredtomyself,“Ridiculous!”5.我閉上眼睛，任由思緒飄揚，腦海里不斷閃現(xiàn)以前過生日時的溫馨畫面。Iclosedmyeyes,withmythoughtswanderingaway,andmemoriesofpastjoyful

birthday

scenecamefloodingbacktome.6.就在這時，似乎有人在叫我的名字。Justthen,someonewascallingmebymyname.完整作文Paragraph1:

Istaredatthepaperandthenlookedaround.

However,whatmademefeelgloomierwasthattherewasnooneherebuttheboundlesssea.

Walkingdowntheseashore,Ihadamillionthoughtsrunningthroughmymind,“MaybeIcanfindmynew

friends

inthedistance.”Staringatthe

bottle,Imurmuredtomyself,“Ridiculous!”

Iclosedmyeyes,withmythoughtswanderingaway,andmemoriesofpastjoyful

birthday

scenescamefloodingbacktome.Justthen,someonewascallingmebymyname.

Paragraph2

AsIopenedmyeyes,Ifoundmyfatherstandingrightbesideme.Confused

andabitanxious,Iasked,“Dad,whyareyouhere?”My

father

repliedinagentlevoice,“Let’sgobackhome.”Followingmyfather,wecameback.ThemomentIsteppedintothehouse,Iwasgreetedbyabeautifulbirthdaycakeonthetableandthewarmsmileonmymother’sface.Thevoiceof

“Happybirthday”brokethe

silence

andmeanwhil