Frasier《歡樂一家親（1993）》第十季第五集完整中英文對照劇本

1、第十季 第五集嘿 Roz 嗨 嗨 RozHey, Roz. Hi, hi, hi. Roz,你剛剛錯過了一個史上絕妙的惡作劇you just missed the classic prank of all time.我必須要說 那是我的杰作I'll admit it, this was my masterpiece.噢 誰啊 誰啊 你整誰了 - 給你說Oh, who, who? Who'd you get? - OK.干得漂亮 Bulldog - 他在那兒呢Way to go, Bulldog! - There he is!我在地下車♥庫&hear

2、ts;用一臺報廢的寶馬I got this friend down at the impound lot,整到了這個伙計who came across a smashed-up BMW,那臺破車和Frasier愛車的型號♥一模一樣same make and model as Frasier's.真的啊 你整到了FrasierYou didn't! You got Frasier!我把他的車拖出車♥庫♥ 然后把那個破車停在車位上I had his car towed from the garage, the wre

3、ck went in its place.他看見的時候嚇壞了The doc totally freaked when he saw it.他先是爆粗口First, he started swearing,然后又求天告地and then he implored the heavens,當(dāng)他嘴唇都開始發(fā)抖的時候and just when his lip started trembling,Bulldog出來告訴他這一切都是惡作劇Bulldog comes out, tells him it's all a prank.嘿 我可是見好就收了Hey, Bulldog observes the

4、mercy rule.再說了 我把這一切都錄下來了Besides, I got the whole thing on tape.承認(rèn)吧 醫(yī)生 我整到你了Admit it, Doc, I got you good.來吧 說"Bulldog最棒了"Come on, say it: "Bulldog's the best!"好吧 好吧 來一段兒我教你的熱舞怎么樣OK, OK, how 'bout the bitch dance I taught you?那么 至少擊個掌吧 來Well, at least give me one up high!

5、 Come on.噢 行了 別讓我白舉個手oh, come on, don't leave me hanging,醫(yī)生 你的萬圣節(jié)精神呢Doc! Where's your Halloween spirit?放心 我一直舉手等著呢Don't worry, it'll be here waiting for you.聲明一下 我一開始就看出來那不是我的車了For the record, I knew immediately it was not my car.我車上有車尾貼 上面寫著Mine has a bumper sticker on it that says,

6、"擁護(hù)奧普拉 行使選舉權(quán)""I AM PRO OPERA AND I VOTE!"Frasier 你得承認(rèn) 他手段很高明Frasier, you've got to admit, it was clever.我什么也不會承認(rèn)I admit nothing.再也不要討論這件事了That is the last we shall discuss of it,我們還要做節(jié)目呢 We have a show to do.下午好 西雅圖Good afternoon, Seattle,歡迎來到Crane醫(yī)生秀的萬圣節(jié)特別節(jié)目and welcome to th

7、e Halloween edition of the Dr. Frasier Crane Show.今天我們來談一談 恐懼Today we will be discussing the topic. of fears.人們會恐懼莫名的阻礙 還是更新?lián)Q代的工具呢Are they irrational hindrances, or evolutionary tools?嗯 說了這么多 答案竟然是Hmmm. the surprising answer, after these words.我的車 噢不要 我的車My car! Ohhhh, no my caaar!他們對你做了什么 噢我的寶貝車車Wh

8、at did they do to you?! Oh, my bay-beee.!舉手等著呢Whenever you're ready.又到了10月31日嗎你找到點兒東西沒Did you find something?你覺得他們會要醬油包嗎Do you think they'll take soy sauce packets?誰一直在摁門鈴啊 - 噓 是來要糖的小孩子Who keeps ringing the doorbell? - Shh! It's trick or treaters.好了 他們走了 - 怎么 為什么不讓他們進(jìn)來OK, they're gon

9、e. - Well, why didn't you let them in?因為某些人忘了準(zhǔn)備萬圣節(jié)糖果Because someone forgot to get Halloween candy.盡管如此 有的人本來可以買♥♥糖的Although, someone else could have picked it up因為她就在商店里啊since she was already in the store.但是 那樣就破壞了某些人But, that would override the duty list一直堅持實施的任務(wù)表啊that som

10、eone insisted on implementing.如果你們管這也叫吵架If this is what you two call a fight,那你們根本不配結(jié)婚you're not fit to be married.有一次我把你♥爸♥的頭按到水下 然后 - 噓I once held your father's head underwater, and. - Shh!哦 天哪 我們沒有糖 走開Oh, for heaven's sake! We haven't got any candy, shove off

11、!這下好了 他們知道家里有人了Great, now they know we're here.這個國家的癥結(jié)所在就是That is precisely what's wrong with this country,沒人敢站出來反抗這些孩子everyone's afraid to stand up to the children.不給糖就搗蛋 - 你沒聽見嗎 我們沒有糖Trick-or-treat! - Didn't you hear? We've got no candy!我們可以給你酒店里帶回來的香皂We can offer you hotel soa

12、ps.但這是萬圣節(jié)啊 我盛裝打扮 你得給我糖啊But it's Halloween. I dress up, you give me candy.你這衣服是要嚇人的嗎 - 不是啊 你的是嗎That costume's supposed to be scary? - No, is yours?噢 你那張小嘴Oh, a nice bite into an onion真該被塞滿洋蔥is what that mouth of yours deserves.如果你不給糖 我就會搗蛋的If you don't have treats, you're going to get

13、 a trick.隨你怎么辦 我不怕你Do your worst! I'm not afraid of you.認(rèn)真的Honestly!也許我還是應(yīng)該去買♥♥點糖回來OK, well, maybe I'll go and get some candy after all.好吧 我還是去拿我的雨衣和壁球護(hù)目鏡吧OK, I'm going to need my slicker and my squash goggles!好吧 要是氣球是藍(lán)色怎么辦早上好 Roz 一起吃吧 - 好啊 FrasierGood morning, Roz.

14、 May I join you? - Sure, Frasier.很高興見到你今天不是怒氣沖沖的Well, I'm glad to see you're not sulking today.是啊 我好好地想了想Yes, well, I had a little time to think about it,決定要把Bulldog整我這事兒拋在腦后and I've decided to put Bulldog's prank behind me.很成熟的想法 - 我沒說完吶That's very mature. - I'm not finished

15、!前提是我得整回去.by visiting upon him a prank還得用比他損十倍的招兒 看這個that is ten times more dastardly. Look at this.看起來像是綁著氣球的汽車啊 - 的確是Looks like a car with a balloon tied to it. - Precisely.每次他最愛的海鷹隊輸比賽時I will tie a red balloon to the antenna我就會在他車的天線上綁一個of Bulldog's car every time his precious Seahawks.紅氣球.lo

16、se a game.假以時日 這種條件反射Over time, the conditioned response在他的心里就會變得根深蒂固will become ingrained in his psyche.最終 他一看到紅色的氣球Eventually, the mere sight of a red balloon.就會有一種無法言說的.will bring about in him an inexplicable sense.挫敗 .of loss.完勝Check and mate 這是不有點 過頭了Isn't that. kind of out there?要的就是這樣 當(dāng)然了

17、That's the point. Well, of course,我可以隨便弄一個你們那種小兒科整蠱I could go with any one of your basic pranks:遞一杯開水什么的 相信我hand in warm water, and whatnot. Believe me,我對這些了如指掌I have an intimate knowledge of all of them.但是我在尋求一種專屬于我的方式But what I'm looking for is something unmistakably ME.可以說是一個整蠱代表作 A signa

18、ture prank, if you will.你為什么不能忘了報復(fù)Why don't you just forget about revenge給他時間休息休息and give him his two minutes in the sun?什么 我付薪水他休息 - 看看他的生活吧What, at my expense? - Look at his life!你們原本是平等的You guys used to be equals,現(xiàn)在他必須待在樓下那個now he's stuck downstairs in that不見天日的 發(fā)霉的檔案室dark, musty archives

19、 room.你得同情同情他 不是嗎You must have some sympathy for him, don't you?"不見天日 發(fā)霉的檔案室" 我也許能用到"Dark, musty archives". I think I could use that!大家好啊 - 你好 NilesHello, all. - Hello, Niles.我們?yōu)槭裁捶堑迷谶@兒耽誤 Why do we have to stop here? 我在家我也可以做咖啡I could make coffee at home.現(xiàn)在 還是不回家比較好Now, now,

20、it's good to get out of the house,呼吸呼吸新鮮空氣 鍛煉一下肺部什么的get some fresh air, exercise those lungs.我的肺一直都很好啊My lungs are as strong as ever.就昨天 我兩口就把整個雪茄抽完了Just yesterday, I finished a whole cigarette in two drags.破紀(jì)錄了One off me record!這是什么 - 我在設(shè)計一個終極整蠱What's this? - I'm devising the ultimate p

21、rank,來報復(fù)Bulldogto get my revenge on Bulldog.呃 就是要小心點兒年輕人也許技高一籌Ah, well just beware the dangers of juvenile one-upsmanship. 就是昨晚 Moon女士Only last night, Mrs. Moon教訓(xùn)了一個要糖果的孩子challenged a trick-or-treater,他就朝我們家門上砸雞蛋and he responded by pelting our door with eggs.對 但是我算是扳平了Yeah, but I got the little mons

22、ter back,我涂了一大坨潤滑的凡士林by putting a big, greasy glob of Vaseline在那小鬼家的門把手上on his doorknob!你說了要了結(jié)這個事兒的 - 所以我才用凡士林啊You said you'd put an end to it! - Hence the Vaseline.媽 他還是個孩子啊 Mum, he's a child! 那是該讓他知道跟Gertrude Moon胡來Well, it's time he learned you don't mess with Gertrude Moon,是會有嚴(yán)重后

23、果的without incurring my wrath.那么就這樣 我要一杯可可Now, excuse me, I require cocoa.其實 我覺得她的心態(tài)很正確You know, I think she has the right attitude.如果我想讓Bulldog不再惹我If I expect Bulldog to leave me alone,我就得讓他知道他是在和一個聰明絕頂?shù)娜舜蚪坏繧've got to show him that he's dealing with a superior intellect.先給他們看看那個帶氣球的車Show th

24、em the balloon car.我相信達(dá)芬奇早期的手稿也是被人嘲笑過的I'm sure Da Vinci's early notes were full of laughs too!不好意思 我還有設(shè)計要做Excuse me, I have devising to do!一共是 32.03美元That'll be. $32.03.一杯飲料這么貴For one drink?!你的孫子還點了一籃蛋糕Your grandson ordered a bunch of cakes,他說是您結(jié)賬and he said it was all on you.謝謝您的招待 奶奶Th

25、anks for the treats, Grandma!噢 看那個小崽子沒了這怎么上學(xué)Oh, let's see the little sod get to school without these.噢 這樣就解決啦Oh, this should settle it!恐怖儲藏室有人嗎Is anybody there?啊 僵尸啊Oh, zombies.行尸走肉啊 救命啊 救命啊the living dead. Help, help!大家停一下Everyone, hold please.二號♥僵尸 你干嘛呢Zombie Number Two, what are yo

26、u doing?我在嚇Bulldog吧I'm scaring Bulldog?我懂了I see.僵尸是干這個的嗎 他們嚇人嗎Is that what zombies do, they scare people?錯Wrong.他們吃人腦 這才嚇人They eat brains, and THAT'S what scares people.好 這是我們的帶妝彩排Now, look, this is our dress rehearsal,咱們一定認(rèn)真點啊let's please try to get this right.Bulldog走進(jìn)來 他聽見動靜 僵尸要吃他的腦子B

27、ulldog comes in, he hears noises, zombies go after his brain,然后他受驚的樣子就會被錄下來and his terror is caught on供我們大家日后娛樂videotape for us all to enjoy at a later date.現(xiàn)在再來一遍 站到最初走位上Now, let's try this again. First marks, please.哦 天啊Fras 這是第四遍了Oh, jeez, Fras, this is the fourth time through.能讓別人來演Bulldog嗎C

28、an somebody else play Bulldog now?爸 你說了你會幫我的Dad, you said you would help me with this.那是因為你說我們要搞一個惡作劇Well that's because you said we were gonna do a practical joke.我本以為會很有趣 - 誰說會有趣了I thought it would be fun. - Whatever gave you that idea?Todd 我能看出來你在演尸體Todd, I am getting "Dead" From yo

29、u.但是我沒看出來你是行尸啊But I am not getting "Undead."還不行Still?咱們這樣吧Let's try this then.排練之后 我希望你們每人寫一段話After rehearsal, I want each of you to write a paragraph詳述一下你們的角色生前是什么樣的人detailing who your character was when he or she was alive,他們是怎么死的how they died,以及現(xiàn)在為什么要吃Bulldog的腦子and why they're n

30、ow after Bulldog's brain.說真的 Roz 這樣讓我很難辦Honestly, Roz, you know, you haven't given me much to work with here.他們是我見過的最差的演員These are the worst actors I've ever seen.是啊 很抱歉皇家僵尸劇團(tuán)正巧Well, I'm sorry, but the Royal Zombie Company just left town出城去表演僵尸版哈姆雷特了with its all-zombie production of

31、"Hamlet"!我們還要來幾遍How many more times are we going to do this?為什么Bulldog惡作劇的時候Why is it that whenever Bulldog pulls off a practical joke,你們都?xì)g呼喝彩you all applaud him,就像他贏了什么獎杯一樣as if he'd won some sort of bowl or cup or other sports dish?但是當(dāng)我讓你花一個周日排練的時候But when I ask you to give up a sing

32、le Sunday,我得到的就只有抱怨all I get is complaints?那是因為你把這變成了工作Well, because you keep turning it into work!這本來應(yīng)該很開心的This is supposed to be fun!就像那天在海邊一樣Like a day at the beach! 噢 你總是做這種掃興的事Oh, you do this kind of thing all the time.我什么時候這樣啦 Like when? 就是上一次我們?nèi)ズ＿叺臅r候Like the last time we went to the beach!有很多

33、人帶耙子的A lot of people bring rakes!聽我說 Frasier 現(xiàn)在退出還不晚Look, Frasier, it's not too late to back out of this.面對事實吧 你本來就不擅長輕松幽默的東西Face it, jokes just aren't your specialty.你說這什么意思What is that supposed to mean?兒子 她說的意思是Well, what she means, son,我們都擅長不同的東西is that we all have our different blessings

34、.Bulldog很會搞笑逗樂 而你就擅長And Bulldog's good at jokes and fun, and you're good at.讀書 還有 嗯 告訴別人你在讀什么.reading, and, uh. telling people about the things you read.你就是說我弄不成這個事兒了Are you saying that you think I can't pull this off?噢 我并不是這個意思Oh, I wouldn't put it that way.我是I would.但是我每個細(xì)節(jié)都考慮到了But

35、 I've worked this out to the last detail,出不了差錯的 - 當(dāng)然有差錯nothing can go wrong! - Everything's gonna go wrong!首先 Bulldog肯定會察覺到不尋常For one thing, Bulldog's gonna know something's up,因為Kenny幾乎不會讓他晚上上班'cause Kenny hardly ever makes him work at night!再看這些照相機(jī)還有電線And then look at all these

36、 cameras and wires.他萬一發(fā)現(xiàn)了呢What if he spots these?還有這些僵尸 他一看就會知道And the zombies, as soon as he sees them,這是個惡作劇he's gonna know it's a prank,因為他剛剛整過你because he just pranked you!而且根本就沒有僵尸這種東西好嗎And there are no such things as zombies!閣下 你You, sir.被放逐了are released!你也是And you as well!我會自己把這事兒搞定I&#

37、39;ll pull this thing off by myself,證明你們都是一派胡言proving you don't know what you're talking about!我才不需要你們I don't need any of you!等等 僵尸們 你們還有用Wait, zombies, I do need you!但是不需要別人But no one else!我會證明給你們看 記住我的話I'll show all of you! You mark my words,明天晚上我會復(fù)仇的tomorrow night I get my revenge

38、!哦 真好 特效機(jī)器又能用了 好了Ah, good, the effects machine's working again. All right, everyone大家回到最初的站位上back to your first marks.怎么才到Where have you been?對不起I'm sorry,這地方太難找了I had a hard time finding this place.我在地址錄里找"Crane"I checked the directory for "Crane,"但是你們家門牌號♥邊上寫

39、著"瘋老太"But it had "Old Bat" Next to this apartment number.這惡作劇有點兒明顯 但是還不賴A little obvious, but not bad.我想讓你把這個"我要噓噓"娃娃I want you to deliver this "Baby-I-Have-To-Tinkle" Doll送給弗洛伊德中學(xué)的Jason Whiteto Jason White, Floyd Middle School.這是地址 我想他現(xiàn)在應(yīng)該在上體育課吧This is the ad

40、dress. I mean, he should be in gym class about now.我不覺得我能就這么大搖大擺地走進(jìn)學(xué)校 女士I don't think I'm allowed to just walk into his school, ma'am.別擔(dān)心 沒事兒的 我是他的奶奶N(yùn)o, it's OK. I'm his grandmother.記住你要說的話And you have to say this."你媽媽說了"Your mommy said,帶著這去學(xué)校能讓你振作起來bring this to you at

41、 school to lift your spirits.你看 玩具娃娃也有憋不住的時候"See? A dolly has accidents too."你真想讓我這么說 - 是的 而且要大聲說You really want me to say that? - Yes, and very loudly.那小家伙聽力有問題The poor thing's hard-of-hearing.太棒啦Yes!地下室驚魂Todd 把棒球帽脫下來Todd, take off that baseball cap.你是不死之軀 不是未開化之人You're undead, no

42、t uncouth.好了 各位都麻利點All right, everyone, step lively,機(jī)靈點look sharp.好戲就要上演了It's almost showtime.房♥間色調(diào)檢查一遍 回到站位上去Give me a final room tone check, please, and. take your marks.嘿 FrasHey, Fras.哦 你們好啊Well. hello.我猜你們是來看我失敗的吧You've come to watch me fail, I suppose.不 我們只是想來加入你No, we just

43、want to come join you.是啊 很抱歉昨天對你說了那些話Yeah, we're sorry about that stuff we said yesterday.是的 我們是來見證你的偉大時刻的Yeah, we came to see you have your day.期待已久It's long overdue.也許我不想讓你們來呢Maybe I don't want you here.這話什么意思What do you mean?你們在我最需要的時候拋棄我You abandon me in my hour of need,現(xiàn)在又來分享我成功的滋味n

44、ow you're here to revel in my success,就像在Boswell的<Johnson傳>中一樣just like in Boswell's "Life of Johnson."指Samuel Johnson <英語大辭典的編者 那是什么 那是我讀的書What? - It was something-I-read.也是我們活該 誰知道那是什么意思I guess we deserved that whatever the hell it means.好了 Frasier 真的很抱歉 就讓我們看吧Come on, F

45、rasier, we're sorry. Just let us watch.好吧 接受道歉 你們可以看 安靜地看All right, apology accepted. You may observe - in silence.請自便Make yourselves comfortable.準(zhǔn)備見證一個要被逼瘋的男人吧And prepare to witness a man brought to the very edge of madness!我覺得他已經(jīng)瘋了I think he's already there.媽 我們?nèi)ヂ牻豁憳妨薓um, we're off to

46、the symphony.還沒受夠德國人的罪吶Haven't the Germans punished us enough?哦 該死的Oh! Bloody hell!這從哪兒來的Where did this come from?你肯定是惹人生氣了吧Oh, you must have crossed someone.媽Mother.天啊 太抱歉了 我們剛下來Oh my God! I'm so sorry! We were just coming down the hall,就看見你們打開門了and we saw you open your door. 這是我們的垃圾桶 那放在這兒

47、干什么This is our trash can! - What was it doing there?Jason 過來Jason, get back here!看起來我們的孩子們在鬧別扭 很不好意思It seems our children have been feuding. We're very embarrassed.別不好意思了 看看我們的女兒You're embarrassed? Meet our daughter!你們好啊Hello! 我還有一堆作業(yè) 別動I have a lot of homework. - Stay!Jason 你是在和這位女士對著干嗎Jaso

48、n, have you been fighting with this woman?是她弄壞了我的自行車Well, she broke my bike還讓我在學(xué)?？戳诵睦碜?amp;hearts;詢&hearts;師and made me have to see a counselor at school! 我好像有什么東西忘在廚房&hearts;了 別動I think I left something in the kitchen. - Stay!我是成年人了 我可以做我任何想做的事I am an adult! I can do anything I want!不行 住在我們

49、家就得按照我們的規(guī)矩來No. While you're living under our roof, you'll follow our rules.你們應(yīng)該為你們的所作所為感到羞愧You two should be ashamed of yourselves.萬一有人受傷了呢What if someone got hurt? 那才好呢 Jason 你再過分Good. - Jason! You are one second away我們就要斷了你的網(wǎng)from losing your broadband connection.現(xiàn)在道歉然后握手言和吧Now apologize an

50、d shake hands.才不要Pish不道歉的話What if I told you你就再也不能在你屋里吸煙了you couldn't smoke your pipes in your room anymore?對不起I'm sorry.現(xiàn)在你們倆要把這收拾好Now, you two are going to clean up this mess.還有Jason 完事直接回家And Jason, come straight home when you're finished.我們回家的時候這里最好一塵不染And this place better be spotle

51、ss by the time we get back.我真希望自己是個大人I wish I was all grown-up,那樣我就不用聽他們的蠢話了and I wouldn't have to follow their stupid rules!哦 長大還是一樣 相信我Oh, nothing changes, trust me.知道么 我媽很怕蟲子 You know. my mom hates bugs. 她能被嚇得像小女生一樣大叫She screams like a girl.我女婿也是So does my son-in-law!我知道哪兒能捉到蟋蟀I know where we

52、 can find some crickets.別 我們應(yīng)該聽話No! Now, we should do as we're told, 先打掃干凈 好and start cleaning up. - Ok.這樣 他們就不會察覺了That way, they won't be expecting it!本集拍攝中并無僵尸受傷這真是太棒了 等不及了 我都起雞皮疙瘩了This is so great! I can't wait! I'm getting goose bumps!你摸摸 摸摸Feel me, feel me!Kenny 我讓你在這看的條件是什么Kenn

53、y, what was the condition of my letting you watch?他來了There he is.放嘎吱聲一Cue creaking noise one.有人嗎 誰在哪兒Hello? Who's there?嘎吱聲二Cue creaking noise two.現(xiàn)在 讓恐懼蔓延吧Now, let the horror begin.太好了 感覺怎么樣啊 大寶貝Yes! How do you like that, ya big baby!后退Get back!天哪 天哪 快打911 打911Oh my god! Oh my god! Call 9-1-1,

54、call 9-1-1!別擔(dān)心 KennyDon't worry about it, Kenny!這只是個玩笑It's just a joke!你們什么意思What are you talking about?! 槍是假的 什么 It's a fake gun! - What? 槍是假的It's a fake gun!那子彈呢What about the bullets?都是假的It's a joke!Bulldog發(fā)現(xiàn)了Frasier的惡作劇 Bulldog found out about Frasier's prank, 所以我們設(shè)了一局so

55、we set him up!太有意思了 簡直不相信他中招了That is awesome! I can't believe he fell for it!來吧 我們得告訴Frasier到底是怎么回事Come on, we got to go tell Frasier what's going on!你們先走吧You guys go ahead.我覺得我得去吐會兒I think I'm gonna stay here and puke.停 停 這都是玩笑Stop! Stop! It was all a joke!噢天哪 看我都做了什么Oh my God, what hav

56、e I done?!沒什么大不了的 他都是僵尸了What's the big deal, he was already a zombie!你瘋了嗎 叫救護(hù)車啊Are you insane?! Call an ambulance!到底怎么回事What is going on here?看鏡頭招招手 FrasierWave to the camera, Frasier!什么What?又整到你了 一切記錄在案 誰最強(qiáng)Got you again, all on tape. Who's the king?一點也不好笑 我差點犯心臟病That isn't funny, I could have had a heart attack!噢 對不起 Fras 我們實在是無法抗拒 好吧 至少沒人受傷we just couldn't resist. - Well, at least nobody was hurt.你再一次打敗我了 BulldogYou bested me, Bulldog, again! Crane醫(yī)生 我想我傷到背了 什么Dr. Crane, I think I hurt my back. - What? 天啊 看我們干了什么oh my god! -