英語趣味閱讀

Jim and Mary were both patients in a Mental Hospital. One day while they were walking by the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom. Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.When the medical director became aware of Marys heroic act he immediately reviewed her file and called her into his office. Mary, I have good news and bad news. The good news is youre being discharged because since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think youve regained your senses. The bad news is Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom,hes dead.Mary replied, He didnt hang himself, I hung him up to dry.Jim和Mary都是精神病院里的病人。一天,他們沿著醫(yī)院的游泳池散步,Jim突然跳入泳池的深水區(qū),他沉到了底部。Mary立刻跳下去救他,她潛到水底,把Jim拉了上來。當(dāng)院長聽聞了Mary的英勇行為后,他立刻翻看了她的病歷檔案,把她叫進了自己的辦公室,“Mary,我有一個好消息和一個壞消息要告訴你。好消息是你能跳入水中救其他病人,這說明你的意識已經(jīng)恢復(fù)了,你可以出院了。壞消息就是,Jim,你救的那個病人,他還是用自己的浴袍帶子在浴室上吊自殺了?！盡ary說:“他沒有自殺,是我把他吊起來好讓他晾干?！盕iveHundredTimes五百遍In the traffic court of a large mid-western city, a young lady was brought before the judge to answer a ticket given her for driving through a red light. She explained to his honor that she was a school teacher and requested an immediate disposal of her case in order that she might hasten on to her classes. A wild gleam came into the judges eye. You are a school teacher, eh? said he. Madam, I shall realize my lifelong ambition. Sit down at that table and write I went through a red light five hundred times.在中西部一個大城市的交通法庭里,一位年輕女士被帶到法官面前,她由于開車闖紅燈被開了罰單。女士向法官解釋,她是一名學(xué)校老師,請求法官馬上處理她的案子,以便可以趕回去上課。法官眼中閃過一絲狡黠,說道:“你是學(xué)校的老師,對嗎?女士,我馬上要實現(xiàn)我畢生的愿望了。在那張桌子旁坐下,寫我開車闖了紅燈500遍?！盰ourhorsecalled馬打電話A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan.He asks, What was that for?She says, I found a piece of paper in your pocket with Betty Sue written on it.He says, Jeez, honey, Betty Sue was the name of the horse I bet on. She shrugs and walks away.Three days later hes reading his paper when she walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head again with the frying pan.He asks, What was that for?She answers, Your horse called.一個家伙正在看報紙,他的妻子走到他身后,用一只煎鍋敲他的后腦勺。他問道:“這是為什么?”她說:“我在你口袋里發(fā)現(xiàn)了一張寫有Betty Sue的紙條?！彼f:“哎呀,親愛的,Betty Sue是我賭的那匹馬的名字?！彼柫寺柤?走了。 三天后他正在看報紙,妻子走到他身后,又用一只煎鍋敲他的后腦勺。他問:“這又是為什么?”她答道:“你的馬打電話來了?！焙孟南?！An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings currently on display. Ive got good news and bad news, the owner replied. The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all fifteen of your paintings.Thats wonderful! the artist exclaimed, Whats the bad news?. With concern, the gallery owner replied, The guy was your doctor.一名藝術(shù)家問畫廊老板,最近有沒有人對他展出的畫感興趣。“這有好消息和壞消息,”老板回答。“好消息是有一位先生咨詢你的作品,他想知道在你死后你的畫會不會升值。我告訴他你的畫會升值,他就把你的15幅畫全都買走了?！薄罢媸翘昧恕?藝術(shù)家是喜形于色,“那壞消息是什么?”帶著關(guān)心的口吻,畫廊老板回答,“買畫的人是你的醫(yī)生”。Story 107Fear is only six inches deep故事107 六英尺的恐懼A man walking in the nightslippedfrom a rock.一個人在趕夜路時，突然從巖石上跌了下去。Afraid that he would fall down thousands of feet, because he knew that place was a very deepvalley, he took hold of a branch that was hanging overthe rock.他嚇得趕緊抓住了巖石上的樹枝，因為他知道這一帶有個深谷，一不小心就會跌入上千英尺的深淵。In the night all he coulds see was abottomlessabyss.一晚上，他唯一能看到的就是深不見底的峽谷。He shouted, his own shout reflected backthere was nobody to hear.他大呼救命，但只聽到了自己的回音-沒有人能聽到他呼救。You can imagine that man and his whole night of scare.你可以想象一下他的處境和整晚的恐懼。Every moment there was death, his hands were becoming cold, he was losing hisgrip死神隨時都可能降臨。他的手開始發(fā)涼，漸漸地抓不住了And as the sun came out he looked down and he laughed.當(dāng)太陽升起的時候，他朝下看了看，笑了。There was no abyss. Just six inches down there was a rock.下面壓根就沒有什么深淵。在他下方六英尺的地方有一塊大石頭。He could have rested the whole night, slept well-the rock was big enough-but the whole night was a nightmare.巖石那么大，他本可以在那兒休息一個晚上，美美的睡上一覺，但昨晚他卻在夢魘中度過。Fear is only sixinchesdeep.恐懼只是六英尺的距離而已。Now it is up to you whether you want to go onclingto the branch and turn your life into anightmare, or whether you would love to leave the branch and stand on your feet.接下來，到了你做決定的時候了：你是想要繼續(xù)抓著樹枝過夢魘一般的生活，還是更喜歡把手從樹枝上松開，雙腳著地?There is nothing to fear.真的沒有什么好害怕的。In the story what happened on the next day?A. The man found that there was no abyss but only a rock.B. The man lost his grip and fell in the abyss.C. The man waited until someone passed and saved him.Story 111 The Frog and the Well故事111青蛙和井Two frogs lived together in amarsh.兩只青蛙住在沼澤里。One hot summer the marsh dried up, so they had to leave it andlook foranother place.在一個炎熱的夏季，沼澤干涸了，因此他們不得不離開去尋找新的濕地。They soon found a deepwell.他們很快發(fā)現(xiàn)一口深井。One of them looked down and said to the other, This is a nice cool place. Lets jump in and settle down here.其中一只向下看了看對另一只說：“這是個涼爽的好地方，就住這里吧?！盩he other frog was much wiser. He replied, Dont be so fast, my friend. If this well dries up like the marsh, how should we get out again?而另一只較明智，它說：“別著急,朋友，如果這口井也干了的話，我們怎么出來呢？”寓意：凡事應(yīng)該首先考慮周到，然后再付諸行動。According to you knowledge, what will happen to the two frog if the well dries up like the marsh?A. They can give up the well and look for another place to live.B. They cant get out of the well, and have no choices but die in that dried well.Story 108The ass in the lions skin故事108 披著獅皮的驢Anassonce found a lions skin. He put it on, and walked towards the village.有頭驢發(fā)現(xiàn)一張獅子皮，他披著獅子皮走進村莊。All fled when he came near,both men and animals.所有的人和動物見到他走過來都逃走了。The ass felt quite proud. Heliftedhis voice andbrayed, but then everyone knew him.驢感到很得意，他高聲地嘶叫，卻被人認了出來。His owner came up and gave him asoundwhipping.他的主人跑過來打了他一頓。Shortlyafterwards,a fox came up to him and said, Ah, I knew it was you by your voice.不久，一只狐貍也跑過來，對他說：“哦，你一張嘴我就知道你是驢?！盚ow does the fox know that the lion isdisguisedby the ass?A. By his ower.B. By his skin.C. By his voice.Story 111 The Two Pots故事111兩口鍋There were twopotson the bank of a river. One was made ofbrass, and the other was made ofclay.河中漂流著一個瓦鍋和一個銅鍋。When the water rose they bothfloatedoff down the river. Theearthenpot tried to stay away from the brass one.每當(dāng)潮漲潮落時，瓦鍋就盡量地遠離銅鍋。So the brass pot cried out, Fear nothing, friend, I will not hit you.銅鍋大叫：“別害怕，朋友，我不會撞你的。”But I may comein contact withyou, said the earthen pot. If I come too close, whether I hit you or you hit me, I shallsufferfor it.“但是我有可能會和你接觸，”瓦鍋對銅鍋說，“如果我離你太近，無論是你碰到我，或者是我自己不小心碰到你，我都會碎的?！盇fter that the earthen pot floated away.然后，瓦鍋就漂走了。寓意： 與強硬的人相伴是很不安全的。Why did the earten pot float away from the brass pot?A. Because he hated to be with the brass pot.B. Because if he came near the brass pot, he will be broken.Story 110 The Thirsty Crow故事110 口渴的烏鴉A crow felt verythirsty. He looked for water everywhere. Finally, he found apitcher.一只烏鴉口渴了，到處找水喝。終于，他找到了一個大水罐。But there was not a lot of water in the pitcher.然而，水罐里面的水并不多。Hisbeakcould not reach it. He tried again and again, but still could not touch the water.他的尖嘴夠不到水面，他試了一次又一次，都沒有成功。When he was about to give up, an idea came to him.就在他想放棄的時候，他突然想到一個主意。He took apebbleand dropped it into the pitcher.烏鴉叼來了一塊小石子投到水罐里。Then he took another and dropped it in.接著又叼了一塊又一塊石頭放進去。Gradually, the water rose, and the crow was able to d