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Unit6Caring

for

yourhealthLesson5Writing九年級(jí)下冊(cè)—上海教育出版社—英語(yǔ)—第三模塊第六單元3.運(yùn)用表示關(guān)心、建議和祝愿的表達(dá)方法。4.使用“蛛網(wǎng)圖”列寫(xiě)作要點(diǎn)并根據(jù)寫(xiě)作步驟完成郵件和修改。2.列出“慰問(wèn)建議類(lèi)郵件”的格式及內(nèi)容要素。1.認(rèn)讀和理解單詞:recovery。Bytheendofthelesson,Ihopewecan:學(xué)習(xí)目標(biāo)

Pre-writing1AnemailtoasickclassmateMary’sproblemWhat’swrongwithMandy?WhatdoesMarywanttodo?Sheissick.ShewantstowriteanemailtoMandy.GettheformatA(P92A)Get

the

formatReceiver’snameSender’snameGreetingBodyClosingThanks/Bestwishes,Sender’snameP92AJimhaswrittenanemailtohisclassmateAndyinhospital.①⑥⑤④③②GettheoutlineLearnusefulexpressionsBGettheoutline(body)UsefulExpressions

Howtoshowyourconcern:

I’msosorrytohearthat…Thatsoundsterrible!

I’msoupsettohearthat…Icouldn’tbelievethat!

WhathappenedtoAndy?HowdoesJimfeelaboutit?CauseofillnessshowconcernTheproblemshe/shefacesGettheoutline(body)WhatistheproblemthatAndyfaces?Causeofillnessshowconcern+Thingswecandoforhim/herGettheoutline(body)WhatwillJimdoforAndy?Theproblemshe/shefacesCauseofillnessshowconcernSuggestionsforhim/her+Gettheoutline(body)WhatdoesJimadviseAndytodo?UsefulExpressions

Howtogivesuggestions:

Itisgood/wisetodo…+Thingswecandoforhim/herTheproblemshe/shefacesCauseofillnessshowconcern

Howtogivesuggestions:Youshould/cando...Youhadbetterdo...Remembertodo...Whynotdo...?Whydon’tyoudo…?What/Howaboutdoing...Itisimportantforsb.todo…Doingsth.is…UsefulExpressionsExpresswishesGettheoutline(body)returntoanormalstateofhealth[r??k?v?ri]UsefulExpressions

HowtoexpresswishesIwishyouallthebestforarapidrecovery.Ihopeyou’llgetwellsoon.Ihopeyouwillgetoveritsoon.

Suggestionsforhim/her++Thingswecandoforhim/herTheproblemshe/shefacesCauseofillnessshowconcernn.恢復(fù)While-writing2Let’sfinishMary’semailtoMandytogether!theseniorhighschoolentranceexaminationMary’sclassmateMandyisgoingtotake

.Butrecently,shefoundthatshesufferedfromthe

ofit.Shecouldnotsleepwellatnightandoftenfeltnervousinthedaytime.Afewdaysago,Shefellasleepinclassand

.Thedoctortoldhertostayathomeforseveraldays.Marywantstowriteanemailtoher.Writingtask:?aheadache?astomachache?atoothache?acold?afever?asorethroatMandy?SpeakingstresshadacoldMaryandMandyLet’sfinishMary’semailtogether!

Analyze

(審)人稱(chēng):時(shí)態(tài):2.Organize(構(gòu))格式:段落:3.List(列)提綱和要點(diǎn)Writingsteps:ThefirstandsecondpersonDependonthetimeoftheaction6parts3paragraphsList(列)TheproblemsMandyfacesSuggestionsforMandyExpresswishesMary’semailtoMandy1.Sufferedfromthestressoftheseniorhighschoolentranceexamination.2.Hadacold.1.Guardagainstthestress:2.Preventacold:Reading?Bepositive?Learntorelax?Takeupahobby?Takecareofyourbody?LaughParagraph1Paragraph2Paragraph2Paragraph2Paragraph31..2..3..…1..2..3..…1).2)..…5minutestofinishtheleftpartsThingsMarycandoforMandyCauseofillnessShowconcernMary’semail

1.Analyze

(審)2.Organize(構(gòu))3.List(列)4.Connect(連)過(guò)渡詞、句、段等5.Polish(潤(rùn))6.Check(查)人稱(chēng)時(shí)態(tài)格式要點(diǎn)錯(cuò)誤(語(yǔ)法、拼寫(xiě)、標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號(hào)等等)Writingsteps:15minutestofinishtheEmailMary’sclassmateMandyisgoingtotaketheseniorhighschoolentranceexamination.Butrecently,shefoundthatshesufferedfromthestressofit.Shecouldnotsleepwellatnightandoftenfeltnervousinthedaytime.Thismorning,Shefellasleepinclassandhad

a

cold.Thedoctortoldhertostayathomeforseveraldays.Marywantstowriteanemailtoher.Post-writing3MaryDearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhaveacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlentmynotebooktoyouhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remenbertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthink.Mostofussufferfromit.Youshouldbepositive.Youshouldlearnrelax.Youshouldsleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpresureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMandyChecklistAsamplefrommystudent12345DearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhaveacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlentmynotebooktoyouhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remenbertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthink.Mostofussufferfromit.Youshouldbepositive.Youshouldlearnrelax.Youshouldsleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpresureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMaryMandyEvaluationchart檢查項(xiàng)目GoodOkayPoorContent內(nèi)容郵件格式5個(gè)內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)Language語(yǔ)言語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤拼寫(xiě)錯(cuò)誤標(biāo)點(diǎn)錯(cuò)誤句式多樣性Coherence連貫性連貫得體MaryDearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhaveacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlentmynotebooktoyouhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remenbertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthink.Mostofussufferfromit.Youshouldbepositive.Youshouldlearnrelax.Youshouldsleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpresureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMandyChecklistGrammarmistake?hadlendandtoMaryDearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhaveacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlentmynotebooktoyouhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remenbertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthink.Mostofussufferfromit.Youshouldbepositive.Youshouldlearnrelax.Youshouldsleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpresureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMandyMaryEvaluationchart檢查項(xiàng)目GoodOkayPoorContent內(nèi)容郵件格式5個(gè)內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)Language語(yǔ)言語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤拼寫(xiě)錯(cuò)誤標(biāo)點(diǎn)錯(cuò)誤句式多樣性Coherence連貫性連貫得體MaryDearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhaveacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlentmynotebooktoyouhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remenbertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthink.Mostofussufferfromit.Youshouldbepositive.Youshouldlearnrelax.Youshouldsleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpresureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMandyChecklistSpellingmistake?severalRememberpressureMaryDearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhaveacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlentmynotebooktoyouhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remenbertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthink.Mostofussufferfromit.Youshouldbepositive.Youshouldlearnrelax.Youshouldsleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpresureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMandyEvaluationchart檢查項(xiàng)目GoodOkayPoorContent內(nèi)容郵件格式5個(gè)內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)Language語(yǔ)言語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤拼寫(xiě)錯(cuò)誤標(biāo)點(diǎn)錯(cuò)誤句式多樣性Coherence連貫性連貫得體MaryDearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhaveacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlentmynotebooktoyouhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remenbertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthink.Mostofussufferfromit.Youshouldbepositive.Youshouldlearnrelax.Youshouldsleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpresureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMandyChecklistPunctuationmistake?MaryDearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhaveacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlentmynotebooktoyouhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remenbertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthink.Mostofussufferfromit.Youshouldbepositive.Youshouldlearnrelax.Youshouldsleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpresureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMandyMaryEvaluationchart檢查項(xiàng)目GoodOkayPoorContent內(nèi)容郵件格式5個(gè)內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)Language語(yǔ)言語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤拼寫(xiě)錯(cuò)誤標(biāo)點(diǎn)錯(cuò)誤句式多樣性Coherence連貫性連貫得體MaryDearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhaveacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlentmynotebooktoyouhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remenbertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthink.Mostofussufferfromit.Youshouldbepositive.Youshouldlearnrelax.Youshouldsleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpresureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMandyChecklistVariedsentencepatterns?It’simportanttoYouhadbetterMaryDearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhaveacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlentmynotebooktoyouhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remenbertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthink.Mostofussufferfromit.Youshouldbepositive.Youshouldlearnrelax.Youshouldsleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpresureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMandyEvaluationchart檢查項(xiàng)目GoodOkayPoorContent內(nèi)容郵件格式5個(gè)內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)Language語(yǔ)言語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤拼寫(xiě)錯(cuò)誤標(biāo)點(diǎn)錯(cuò)誤句式多樣性Coherence連貫性連貫得體MaryDearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhaveacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlentmynotebooktoyouhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remenbertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthink.Mostofussufferfromit.Youshouldbepositive.Youshouldlearnrelax.Youshouldsleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpresureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMandyChecklistTransitionalwords/phrases/sentences?becauseFirstly,…Secondly,…Besides,…Therearestillsomewaystoovercomeit.231MaryDearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhaveacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlentmynotebooktoyouhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remenbertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthink.Mostofussufferfromit.Youshouldbepositive.Youshouldlearnrelax.Youshouldsleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpresureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMandyEvaluationchart檢查項(xiàng)目GoodOkayPoorContent內(nèi)容郵件格式5個(gè)內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)Language語(yǔ)言語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤拼寫(xiě)錯(cuò)誤標(biāo)點(diǎn)錯(cuò)誤句式多樣性Coherence連貫性連貫得體Morewritingskills原句:Youshouldbepositive.表達(dá)觀點(diǎn)技巧:Topicsentences+Supportingdetails(解釋或者舉例)原句:It’simportanttolearntorelax.Addexplanation:(添加解釋)Addexamples:(添加例子)改后:Youshouldbepositiveandbelievethatyourlifeisalwaysfullofhope.改后:It'simportanttolearntorelax.Forexample,youcantakeawalk,listentomusicorwatchafilm.ReadingMaryDearMandy,I’msoupsettohearthatyouhadacold.Doyoufeelbetternow?I’mafraidthatyouwillhaveahardtimestayingathomeforseveraldays.Youmustbeworriedaboutyourschoolwork.Icanlendmynotebooktoyouandhelpyouwithyourstudieswhenyoureturn.Remembertodrinkmorewaterandkeepwarm.Asforthestress,itisnotasterribleasyouthinkbecausemostofussufferfromit.Therearestillsomewaystoovercomeit.

Firstly,youshouldbepositiveandbelievethatyourlifeisalwaysfullofhope.Secondly,It'simportanttolearntorelax.Forexample,youcantakeawalk,listentomusicorwatchafilm.Besides,youhadbettersleepenough.Inaword,don'tputtoomuchpressureonyourself.Iwishyouallthebestforaquickrecovery.Cheers,MaryMandymodifiedversionSummary4Whatmakesagoodemailtoasickclassmate?Receiver’snameSender’snameGreetingBodyClosingSender’snameRightformatGoodcontentCauseofillnessShowyourconcernTheproblemshe/shefacesSuggestionsforhim/herThingsyoucandoforhim/herExpresswishes??ProperlanguageVariedsentencepatternsCoherence

AddsupportingdetailsNomistakes多樣的句式增加細(xì)節(jié)無(wú)錯(cuò)誤連貫性Homework51.Reviseandimproveyouremailusingtheevaluationchart.2.Exchangeyouremailwithyourclassmateandevaluateit.Thankyou!

Unit6Caring

for

yourhealthLesson5Writing(答疑)九年級(jí)下冊(cè)—上海教育出版社—英語(yǔ)—第三模塊第六單元答疑時(shí)間寫(xiě)作中常見(jiàn)問(wèn)題和錯(cuò)誤:一、無(wú)主語(yǔ)例如:1.Haven’tseenyouthesedays.

Ihaven’tseenyouthesedays.2.Afterschool,cantakeawalkwithfriends.

Afterschool,youcantakeawalkwithfriends.

這事是誰(shuí)做的?改進(jìn)措施:添加主語(yǔ)。We/They

I/h

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